“The LORD gave Moses and Aaron the following regulations for the people of Israel. When any man has a discharge from his penis the discharge is unclean, whether the penis runs with it or is stopped up by it. Any bed on which he sits or lies is unclean. Anyone who touches his bed or sits on anything the man has sat on must wash his clothes and take a bath, and he remains unclean until evening. Anyone who touches the man with the discharge must wash his clothes, and take a bath, and he remains unclean until evening.”*
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…Anyone who visits the blog of the man with the discharge must visit James Dobson’s Focus on the Family website, and he remains unclean until doing so.
Note to self:
-Don’t take date to Bible reading prior to sloppy facial attempt. Red Lobster is a better bet.
Spam filter word – [school]
Coincidence? Nay! Chicanery? Aye!
So my question is:
What were Moses and Aaron caught doing
that they should get such a talkin’ to?
Spam word-“police”
Wow. That would mean my underwear is a source of eternal damnation, then….
Lev 15:24 (KJV) “And if any man lie with her at all, and her flowers be upon him, he shall be unclean seven days; and all the bed whereon he lieth shall be unclean.”
You know, my version doens’t mention penis anywhere. All it talks about is sores.
…
But then, Astroglide hadn’t been invented yet.
Unclean until evening for one discharge?
I guess that means I’ve finally getting worked off the uncleanliness of my teen years at the age of 43…
And, Jeff,have you been thinking about this
for awhile or did it just…come to you?
At 9am?
”…whether the penis runs with it or is stopped up by it.”
Oh that’s not good. That’s not good at all.
Turing word: “face”, which is even more not good.
So no matter how much you wash, you’re dirty until evening? Like, evening like dusk; or evening like dark? What if you touch the discharge again after dark? are you automatically clean again since it’s evening (depending on the definition)? Or do you have to wait until the following evening?
And what’s so bad about being unclean? I mean, you don’t have to walk around with a sign on your back that says “He, check me out, I’m unclean” do you? Sorry, I just worry so much about these religious laws. I mean, I don’t want to do it wrong my entire life, preparing myself for eternal bliss, when I’ll just end up in hell with the heathen masses. And Ryan Seacrest.
And, and, is this the protein
of which you speak in the web log name?
jes axin’
“discharge from the penis” ? Shouldn’t this post be about Ward Churchill ?
Isn’t that the passage just before the instructions for using the Holy Hand … Grenade?
The discharge referred to means an unhealthy discharge (like pus), not semen.
Leviticus 15: 16-24
“When a man has an emission of semen, he must bathe his whole body and he remains unclean until evening. Anything made of cloth or leather on which the semen falls must be washed, and it remains unclean until evening. After sexual intercourse both the man and the woman must take a bath, and they remain unclean until evening.
When a woman has her monthly period, she remains unclean for seven days. Anyone who touches her is unclean until evening. Anything on which she sits or lies during her monthly period is unclean. Any one who touches her bed or anything on which she has sat must wash his clothes and take a bath, and he remains unclean until evening. If a man has sexual intercourse with her during her period, he is contaminated by her impurity and remains unclean for seven days, and any bed on which he lies is unclean.”
But he does earn his Red Badge of Courage, tho…
Spam word: death. Oy…
I’m a filthy filthy boy.
Oops. I wasn’t supposed to say that here was I?
Discharged seamen on port call in San Diego; now THAT’S unclean.