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Former teen idol Leif Garrett comments on warnings issued by certain Christian groups that an upcoming SpongeBob Square Pants video promotes homosexuality

Garrett:  “Wait, I know the little dude lives in a fruit.  But that’s hardly the same as sticking your spongy dork into one, is it…?”*

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(h/t Zach Bennett)

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update:  Hugh Hewitt—whose book Blog is the definitive history of the blogosphere, both past and present—seeks to defend Focus on the Family’s Dr. James Dobson from “the Blogger/MSM Mob” (which, so far as I can tell, is made up of Jeff Jarvis and a LA Times editorial writer).

FIGHT THE POWER, HUGH! 

CHARGE!

****

update 2Heh

57 Replies to “Former teen idol Leif Garrett comments on warnings issued by certain Christian groups that an upcoming SpongeBob Square Pants video promotes homosexuality”

  1. Allah says:

    Are you mocking James Dobson?  Hugh Hewitt’s onto you, fella:

    If I was a radical deconstructionist studying the reactions to Dobson and to Summers, I might have to conclude that the bloggers pick their targets in order to gain the approval of the scribbling/talking class along the Bos-Wash corridor, but are careful to avoid offending the big guns therein.  Your conference invite might get revoked.

    I know you wouldn’t want your conference invite revoked, Jeff.  I mean, Leif.

  2. Jeff Goldstein says:

    I CRAVE WONKETTE’S APPROVAL!

  3. Jeff Goldstein says:

    (as a CITIZEN JOURNALIST, I mean…)

  4. Seriously, it was stupid to include “sexual Identity” in the freakin pledge. These are for 2-6 yr olds who don’t even know what a sexual idenitity is!!

    Get off Dobson’s back, without his child rearing book “The Strong Willed Child” I would be in strait jacket today, and the is the damn truth.

  5. Jeff Goldstein says:

    I envision an epidemic of 2-6-year old homos running wild in the playgrounds of red state America.  Kickball replaced by kiddy fashion shows.  Cowboys and Indians?  Cowboys and cowboys. 

    And suddenly that baseball bat becomes a totem…

  6. shank says:

    Little children are kind of half-gay already anyways, might as well go the full monty eh?  I mean, think about it – they’re always hugging members of the same sex, they think members of the opposite sex have cooties, and they’re just SO touchy-feely.  The way I see it, Spongebob’s just outing them all.  Little butt-pirates they are.

  7. BumperStickerist says:

    This theory does account for the prominent role the backs of David Hasselhoff’s legs played in “The Spongebob Squarepants Movie”.

    … and way the the bar scene before the scene with David’s legs was done

    … and, now that I think about it, the scene before that … and … before when King Neptune … and then … oh.

    I guess it is Gay-Programming

    Well, two hours with “Davey and Goliath” this weekend will set my kids straight.

    Or awaken them to the possibilities of anthropomorphic bestiality.

    well, at least they won’t be gay.

  8. SteveL says:

    Kikcball has already been replaced.  It seems it damaged the delicate psyches of the slow, uncoordinated kids that were good at math.  Cowboys and Indians?  If you so much as cock your thumb and point they cuff you and haul you off.  I believe they have Jack Bauer interrogate you to see if you are a terrorist or merely a violent hate monger.  I think we need a CITIZEN JOURNALIST to tackle these offenses against childhood.

  9. Beck says:

    Having seen the David Hasselhoff version of the Sponge Bob Movie ad on TV, I’m thinking Dobson might just have a point.

    Damn queers.  Tricksy ain’t they?

  10. Carin says:

    My kids are too young to have Spongebob lecture them on “sexual identity.” They don’t even know was sex is, let alone all the variations out there. Kids don’t need this stuff – at least until they start watching Anime.

  11. julie says:

    shank:  They’re also very big on sharing their secretions.

  12. Jeff Goldstein says:

    whether kids need lectures on sexual identity is a different question than whether or not the Sponge is promoting homosexuality.

  13. Carin says:

    Of course Spongebob himself isn’t … my kids LOVE him. But, why did the creators allow them to use his voice/image in their little PSA?  Really this whole video is one of those touchy-feely things I can do w/o.  The pledge :

    I pledge to have respect for people whose abilities, beliefs, culture, race, sexual identity or other characteristics are different from my own.

    It’s just more of the same old crap. Let’s not teach to memorize geography and the multiplication tables, but show ‘em this nice video to love and respect one another. Drivel.  Besides, there are certain cultures I have absolutely no respect for. No, on many levels I take issue with this.

  14. SteveL says:

    Jeff’s right.  Dobson doesn’t even mention the video, he goes after a pledge on the website of the people who made the video.  Huh?  Go look at the Xerox website, I hope he doesn’t use their copiers.  This is standard among many companies.

  15. MC says:

    It’s interesting that there’s enough subtlety with some of these ‘big tent’ issues that we will differ from point to point.

    I came down on supporting having Kid Rock perform during inaugural partying – because we were talking about behaving like an adult in the appropriate context – without legislating all behavior in all contexts. And we were talking about friendlies.

    This is different. We aren’t dealing with an organization that even wants to be part of the big tent. And having adults that should know how to behave like an adult in the context of any kind of message about sexuality to very young people reeks almost of pedophilia to me.

    Actually, having any discourse on sexual identity regarding the very young when their sex organs have not developed makes me want to get my gun.

    Cartoon characters have nothing to do with it – unless we just mean the looneys that chose to associate ‘child’ and ‘sex’ at the same time.

  16. Salt Lick says:

    “whether kids need lectures on sexual identity is a different question than whether or not the Sponge is promoting homosexuality.”

    Right, and both questions are in turn different from that of whether Sponge Bob and government schools have the right to take my kid’s education on the matter out of my hands. My “tolerance” may be nuanced differently than “tolerance” as taught by a government school. Jesus, have you spent much time with education majors—most are just children themselves, if not moonbats (I guess they’re covered in the pledge under “those with less abilities.”).

  17. Jeff Goldstein says:

    I agree.  I don’t like the pledge either.

    But again, different question than whether or not SpongeBob promotes homosexuality.

  18. SteveL says:

    Is there any message about sexuality in the video itself?  I haven’t seen it yet.  If so, I agree with MC, it doesn’t belong.  The site looks very much like it might be gay-alligned, and then I see that Bob Dole and Orin Hatch are big proponents of it.  Huh?  Steven Van Zandt is on the board of directors.

  19. Jeff Goldstein says:

    Question:  what do you all think about the Pledge of Allegiance?

  20. MC says:

    SpongeBob? Pat Boone is to Jeff as Niles Rodgers is to Mr. Squarepants.

  21. JWebb says:

    I think the Pledge of Allegiance subtley promotes homosexuality. Especially the “under God” part, if you know what I mean.

    I think it’s about time I ban myself from your site, Jeff…

  22. BumperStickerist says:

    It’s worth pointing out that Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom.

    Were the show intent on promoting homosexuality, Spongebob would reside in Pouchsylvania or Thongville.

  23. MC says:

    Jeff – Did you mean:

    I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

    That one?

  24. Hubris says:

    He sure seemed gay when he was blowin’ me.

  25. SteveL says:

    A sponge lives inside Bikini Bottom?  We’ve got this all wrong, he’s a contraceptive!

  26. Carin says:

    Whether or not Spongebob promotes homosexuality is just silly. What adults want to read into it, is their business. My kids certainly don’t get it, but then they’ve been denied the pleasure of public education (we home school), so perhaps they are too out-of-touch.

  27. Salt Lick says:

    ”…and justice for all.”

    “…in the course of justice, none of us should see salvation…” William Shakespeare, Merchant of Sponge Bob

  28. “I agree.  I don’t like the pledge either.

    But again, different question than whether or not SpongeBob promotes homosexuality.”

    Jeff, so who is asking that question? I don’t think anyone is suggesting that the cartoon character does. The only problem is that the character is on a video with that pledge.

  29. Allah says:

    FIGHT THE POWER, HUGH!

    CBS got to you, didn’t they, Jeff?

  30. Jeff Goldstein says:

    No. Not a pledge.  A pledge that includes sexual identity in its list of things to be celebrated.

  31. MC says:

    ’Cause I was just wondering whether in the context of this thread whether you meant that ‘We Are Family’ pledge – you know the other one:

    I pledge allegiance to the f*gs of the United States of America, and to the butt public for which they stand, gay nation, under, over, and behind – unmentionable, with liberty and license for all. Oh, and give the North American Man/Boy Love Association a chance. They are part of the family too.

    From the NAMBLA site is a variant:

    Freedom is indivisible. The liberation of children, women, boy-lovers, and homosexuals in general, can occur only as complementary facets of the same dream.  —David Thorstad

  32. BumperStickerist says:

    Just out of curiousity, is this one of those dealy-ohs where codewords are being used?

    Does “respect” in this case mean “celebrated” instead of meaning, well, ‘respect’?

    I pledge to have respect for people whose abilities, beliefs, culture, race, sexual identity or other characteristics are different from my own.

  33. SteveL says:

    I’m still missing something.  Is the pledge in the video?  Is sexual orientation in the video?  It seems that the organization that made the video, has it’s own pledge, but when did they become linked?

    Now I agree that kids shouldn’t be fed this touchy feely crap by the government schools in any event, but nobody has linked the pledge to the video.

  34. MC says:

    For this particular point though – even my dearest Mrs. Malkin and I disagree.

  35. jonkendall says:

    yes, yes, yes, our diversity pledge is just FINE. let us alone about it. dobson’s all ‘censor this’ and ‘that’s unacceptable’ and ‘this and that’s all inappropriate’.  but man, it ain’t nothing like what he and his are trying to do.  they wanna put ‘under God’ in the pledge of allegiance. damn FREAK.  he’s a ZEALOT.  let us BBBURNN HIM.  can’t we have our own separate but equal pledge?  huh?

  36. Jeff Goldstein says:

    I’ll be honest. I was a little worried that simply linking to the story—with it’s prominent picture of SpongeBob—would make me gay.

    Let me be even more clear here:  The diversity pledge is stupid but not pernicious. Much like the Pledge of Allegiance.

    Or, to put it another way:  in my opinion, the Pledge “promotes” religion in the exact same degree that the SpongeBob’s pledge “promotes” homosexuality.

  37. Sean M. says:

    Are you saying the Pledge of Allegiance is “stupid,” Jeff? 

    Effing commie.  I swear, the John Birch Society is never around when you need them.

  38. MC says:

    Jeff – Linking and posting only made you a SpongeBob Republican as well as a South Park one. I grok.

    “degree” ? “point of view”

  39. Jeff, the pledge of allegiance is kinda different than a cartoon video pledge.

    I know your trying to say “don’t get your panties in a wad over such trivial stuff.” But, for heaven’s sake, we deal with this “little” stuff over and over and I for one am sick of it.

    Since you just began parenthood Jeff, it won’t be long until you see exactly what we are talking about.

  40. This is what everyone may be missing here. Dr. Dobson has become a force to be reckoned with. He is a very upstanding and well respected Doctor who has written bestselling child rearing books. His Christian organization is not evangelical. Focus on the Family ministers to every type of need out there. And Dr. Dobson has never taken a dime of money from that organization. He does not take a salary. He lives only on his secular child rearing books. He lives a modest lifestyle and has always practiced what he preached.

    The left is now trying to paint him into a Jerry Falwell, quoting him out of context and making him look radical and ridiculous.

    That is what this is about. Period.

  41. Jeff Goldstein says:

    I’ve only been a parent for a year, but I’ve been an adult for a lot longer. And to suggest that telling kids to respect other lifestyles is the same as “celebrating” or “promoting” homosexuality is simply ridiculous and insulting.

    Some people think the Pledge of Allegiance is harmful to their kids. My answer to them is to tell their kids not to say it then.

    But this “offended” nonsense is getting tedious.

  42. Diana says:

    …soaking it up in all the wrong places ..

    What’s really strange is that …

    music video due to be sent to 61,000 U.S. schools in March

    …. teachers find any time to teach.

  43. Jeff, telling older kids, who actually understand what sexuality is, to respect other’sexuality is one thing. To bring that into a pledge to an age group that neither understands nor needs to even hear about sexuality of any kind clearly indicates an agenda.

    That is all I am saying.

  44. MC says:

    RWS – <smooch>

  45. well…<smooch> right back at cha MC!

  46. Carin says:

    My “issue” is that it is “I” that will decide when my kids are ready for sexual discussions. Not the government, and not “the village” (HIllary’s not, M. Knight Shamalamadingdong’s.) This JUST was an issue for me – when my gay cousin had a conversation with my SIX year old regarding “gayness.” At this point, I am basically a black sheep from my family, because my daughter didn’t give a PC answer. Truth be told, my daughter doesn’t know THING ONE about Lesbians, etc.  She gave a six year old answer … which was unacceptable, apparently. Have I “programed” her against gays? My cousin would probably say yes … but, in truth, she has never be informed about any of it.  I think she is too young for any discussions of sexuality. Period.

  47. Carin says:

    And, RWS- I think we are on the same page here.

  48. Carin, I am appalled that your cousin would take it upon herself to discuss ANYTHING of a sexual nature with your child without your permission!!!! Good Lord! My brother makes sure he asks me before he rents movies when he knows my kids are going to be there. It is called “respect.”

    The government nor schools should have ANYTHING to do with the teaching of sexual or religous things in elementary or secondary schools. (I emphasize teaching, because acknowledging is a whole different thing) High school may be a time to approach these subjects from a strictly educational view, meaning learning about different religions, and the biological reproductive discussions of sex. I have no problem with biological reproductive discussions in late middle school either.

  49. Jeff B. says:

    Jeff.  Jeff.  Come now – there is an obvious problem you’re ignoring with this “tolerance” pledge. If I don’t teach my son to hate homosexuality from an early age, he might “catch the gay” from some sinister proselyte, capitalizing upon his ingenuous and unformed ambisexual youth.

    For the sake of America’s children, we cannot allow this to happen.

    (PS: Man you guys really hate Hugh Hewitt, don’t you?)

  50. Jeff B. says:

    By “you guys” I mean you and Allah, who always seems to tag-team here on PW whenever Hewitt comes up.

  51. JWebb says:

    Why has no U.S. pharmaceutical company licensed Sponge Bob Square Pants as a feminine contraceptive product?

  52. cthulhu says:

    Just to throw two cents into something that I know virtually nothing about….a diversity pledge with specifics can easily become obnoxious, through biased selection of listed groups to tolerate.

    Example: “We proudly pledge to extend tolerance to the cultures and peoples of the mideast, including Syria, Qatar, Lebanon, Jordan, Iraq, the UAE, Egypt, Iran, Yemen, and Saudi Arabia.” Could this be seen as anti-Israel? What if it were published in the Times of Lebanon? The NY Times? Le Monde?

    Similarly, if—say—Democrats were to extend fond feelings of amity and tolerance to specific groups who voted 70%+ Democrat in the last election, could this not be seen as implying intolerance toward other groups?

    Common sense and politeness would probably keep any truly well-meant pledges a bit more general.

  53. Well Jeff, thanks for the picture of Spongebob dancing in a gay bar. It is now burned in my brain and I will never feel comfortable watching the exciting episodes in Bikini Bottom or ever look at a cabby patty in the same way again.

    Is NOTHING Sacred?

    Wait…I’m asking that in the wrong place.. my bad.

  54. Diana says:

    “Dear Dowd” has another take in this imbroglio.

    “A Bunch of Krabby Patties

    By MAUREEN DOWD Published: January 23, 2005

    I can’t believe I thought he was just an innocent little sponge wearing tight shorts.

    What in the name of Davy Jones’s locker would a sponge be doing holding hands with a starfish or donning purple and hot-pink flowered garb to redecorate the Krusty Krab if he weren’t a perverted invertebrate?

    Before this is over, we’re going to find out that SpongeBob is the illicit spawn of the Tampa shock jock Bubba the Love Sponge. Who knew SpongeBob would become as fraught as the cover of “Abbey Road”?

    It took Dr. James Dobson, the conservative Christian leader and gay marriage opponent, who claims the president’s re-election was more a mandate for his ideas than George Bush’s, to point out the insidious underside of the popular cartoon character SpongeBob SquarePants. It takes a sponge to brainwash a child.

    Holy Abe! Dr. Dobson outed SpongeBob at a black-tie inaugural fete last week for members of Congress and political allies. He said that a “pro-homosexual video” – starring SpongeBob, Barney, Jimmy Neutron, Winnie the Pooh, Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy – was set to go to elementary schools to promote a “tolerance pledge,” including tolerance for differences of “sexual identity.”

    Hoppin’ clams, as they say in Bikini Bottom, the den of epicene iniquity where SpongeBob lives. Nothing good can come of tolerance.

    Dan Martinsen, a spokesman for Nickelodeon, where SpongeBob beats the pants off the competition, was flummoxed: “It’s a sponge, for crying out loud. He has no sexuality.”

    Dr. Dobson has done the country a service by reminding us to watch out for the dark side of lovable but malleable sponges. He inspired me to fish through the president’s Inaugural Address with a more skeptical eye.

    Mr. Bush’s epic pledge to support democratic movements and institutions in every nation and to end “tyranny in our world” may seem wildly pie-in-the-sky, given that the Iraq vortex has drained our military.

    Although his incendiary speech about “the untamed fire of freedom” has been widely interpreted as a code-red warning to both foes and friends, I wonder if the president knew he was literally promising to stamp out undemocratic governments across the globe, which would include some of our top allies. He probably thought it was a fancier way of repackaging the Iraq invasion, not as a failed search for W.M.D., but as a blow for freedom (a word used 27 times) and liberty (used 15 times).

    I wonder if W. is surprised that people took it literally. The Bushes don’t always understand that they’re being held to their rhetoric in major speeches. (Read my warships.) For such a brass-knuckled vision, the president’s delivery was curiously unemotional.

    Some of the same advisers who filled Mr. Bush’s brain with sugary visions of a quick and painless Iraq makeover did mean the speech to be literal; they are drawing up military options for the rest of the Middle East. Once again, the lovable and malleable president seems to be soaking up the martial mind-set of those around him, almost like … a sponge.

    SpongeBush SquarePants!

    We can only hope that Dr. Dobson doesn’t pick up on the resemblance. SpongeBob, as his song goes, “lives in a pineapple under the sea/absorbent and yellow and porous is he!” SpongeBush lives in a bubble in D.C./absorbent and shallow and porous is he!

    SpongeBush ensnared the country in a whale of a mess in Iraq because he guilelessly absorbed the neocons’ dire warnings about Saddam’s weapons capabilities and their rosy assumptions about Ahmad Chalabi’s leadership capabilities.

    Dick Cheney is a gruff Mr. Krabs taskmaster to SpongeBush, but SpongeBush is crazy about him anyhow. W. trustingly let his vice president make the worst-case scenario about Iraq a first-case scenario.

    Mr. Bush might have thought he was just blowing pretty bubbles full of lofty ideals about freedom and liberty in his speech, but Mr. Cheney and the neocons seem intent on filleting Iran and Syria. (Doesn’t Richard Perle remind you of the snarky and pretentious next-door neighbor to SpongeBob, Squidward Tentacles?)

    The vice president told Don Imus that Iran was “right at the top of the list” of trouble spots, and that Israel “might well decide to act first” with a military strike.

    Even if he’s a little light in the flippers, SpongeBob has brought children good, clean fun. SpongeBush has brought the world dark, endless fights.”

  55. skeloric says:

    If this pledge teaches to respect conservatives then I am definitely opposed.

    Being conservative is a CHOICE!  With proper intervention and prayer vigils one can be freed from the sin of being a Political/social conservative….

  56. Spongebob is really funny and hilarious. somebody says that spongebob is gay, is that even true?”‘:

  57. sometimes spongebob is stingy and annoying*;`

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