24 Replies to “protein wisdom offers advice on how to overcome your outrage over the CBS Memogate Report whitewash”

1. Jeff Goldstein says:

   January 10, 2005 at 10:03 pm

   I have. And I am at peace.

2. Fess Parker says:

   January 10, 2005 at 10:08 pm

   I’m so disappointed. Somebody told me Daniel Boone was your master, and I rushed right over.

   I also played Davy Crockett, y’know.

3. kyle says:

   January 10, 2005 at 10:19 pm

   I’m still waiting for an image (either photoshopped or real) of a kneeling throng worshipping a leather-clad Boone.  Or, in keeping with the Rathergate theme, perhaps a photoshopped picture that is passed off as legit?

4. Robin Roberts says:

   January 10, 2005 at 10:22 pm

   Crap, now I gotta wear more sweaters.

5. Scott P says:

   January 10, 2005 at 10:26 pm

   I got my white patent leather bucks yesterday.  What’s the next step?

6. tongueboy says:

   January 10, 2005 at 10:51 pm

   Wanna know Gunga Dan’s last words from the anchor desk?

   Courage? Nooooo…

   Stay Classy!

7. soccerdad says:

   January 10, 2005 at 10:52 pm

   Hey – anyone notice that Little green footballs has been unavailable all day?  Looks like a D.O.S. got them.

8. Scott P says:

   January 10, 2005 at 11:08 pm

   I haven’t been able to get to LGF, either.  Bummer.

9. Joe says:

   January 10, 2005 at 11:08 pm

   I believe we were promised white vinyl ?

10. Hubris says:

    January 10, 2005 at 11:10 pm

    Why’d you have to cut off the pic just above Pat’s nipples?  Cocktease.

11. Joe says:

    January 10, 2005 at 11:12 pm

    Sorry. On closer inspection I see the white vinyl is inside the black leather.

12. kyle says:

    January 10, 2005 at 11:18 pm

    Thanks, Jeff!  The sexy twinkle in his eye is what makes it work.  How could anyone resist?

13. Diana says:

    January 11, 2005 at 12:05 am

    Scott P –

    What’s the next step?

    White belt.

14. JWebb says:

    January 11, 2005 at 12:25 am

    THIS IS THE ANTIPAT! Don’t let him put the mark of the Boone on your forehead, Jeff!!

    I know a priest in Denver who can be there in minutes with holy water to perform a circumcision!

    S t a y a w a y f r o m t h e l i g h t ! !

15. Carin says:

    January 11, 2005 at 12:38 am

    Something … about … his … eyes … must throw away all my naughty music now.

16. Rightwingsparkle says:

    January 11, 2005 at 2:50 am

    I ‘heart’ Jerry Falwell is gonna look so cool on your butt.

    Maybe we can do a ‘TammyFaye forever’ on your shoulder…yeah…can’t wait.

17. dorkafork says:

    January 11, 2005 at 3:13 am

    “I know a priest in Denver who can be there in minutes with holy water to perform a circumcision!”

    What, like a 24 hour emergency circumcision service?  Is that really necessary?  There are some things I want at 3 in the morning, an operation on my genitals isn’t one of them.  Ok, depends on what you mean by “operation”.  But you get my drift.  “When you absolutely, positively have to get your foreskin removed overnight, call BriskBris!  And yes, we accept tips!” Goodnight folks!  I’ll be here all week!

    (keyword is “shaft”)

18. gail says:

    January 11, 2005 at 5:10 am

    If he performs circumcisions with holy water, I wonder what he uses to cast out demons?

19. JWebb says:

    January 11, 2005 at 7:11 am

    To cast out demons, it’s Schlitz Malt Liquor.

20. bbeck says:

    January 11, 2005 at 3:51 pm

    Jeff, I think you just topped your Anna Nicole spew in terms of gross-out factor.

    And I am resisting the call by turning “Sex Farm” up to 11.

    Later,
    
    bbeck

21. Ana says:

    January 11, 2005 at 4:39 pm

    Holy Water, Excorcism.
    
    Pointy knife, Circumcision.
    
    Grilled cheese, Holy Vision.
    
    Pat Boon, Jeff’s Derision.

    needs work

22. kyle says:

    January 11, 2005 at 5:46 pm

    I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that JWebb meant “exorcism” and not “circumcision”.  Most Jews (myself included) have had the tip snipped long before they reach Jeff’s age.  Otherwise, um, ouch.  I’d hate to be the mohel that got that job!

    Turing word: off
    
    No lie.

23. SteveL says:

    January 11, 2005 at 7:09 pm

    Pat Boone is just a minion….John Denver is his master, even from beyond the grave.

24. Diana says:

    January 12, 2005 at 3:01 am

    Cartman: Dude, that is not cool! Chopping off wee-wee’s is not cool!

    [keyword “nothing” kid you not]

Comments are closed.