Garrett: “Wait, so New Year’s resolutions don’t have to be, like, introspectivey…? Because if that’s the case, screw losing fifteen pounds and landing a sitcom. I’d rather just see that Ryan Seacrest jaggoff suffer like a Biblical Hebrew.”*
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(h/t Command Post)
I used to get confused when your celebrity quotes didn’t match up with the story link, but now I just agree that Ryan Seacrest needs to be beaten like a rented mule.
Whoever Ryan Seacrest might be.
Ooooooo, the Islamic Army has a website. I’m so scared.
Islamic Army: “We’re going to beat you up. Really bad. You bad, bad Americans. And no one likes you anyway. Do you know how many people don’t like you? You are totally unpopular. And you do bad things. Like drink. So God doesn’t even like you. God likes us. You just better watch your back.” Enter GWB and let the slapdown begin.
Lordy. Someone start the Islamic Reformation already. They so desperately need a Martin Luther.
We so desperately need to export hippy culture to the Islamic world–“Peace dude, tokeup! Hey, y’know, we’re like, ‘The Religion of Peace’, and all, right dude?” “Far out, man! Pass the bong, Allah Akbar!”
John Walker Lindh tried that but it didn’t work.
Someone start the Islamic Reformation already. They so desperately need a Martin Luther.
Well, they’ve already got the Anti-Semitism down pat. Now they just need to find someone who knows how to use a hammer….