Search






Jeff's Amazon.com Wish List

Archive Calendar

November 2024
M T W T F S S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
252627282930  

Archives

"Taco Bell looks to 'reinvent the taco'"

Well, not so much “reinvent” — no need to mess with what is, by many accounts, a near perfect food — as take the AWESOMENESS level up to 11!

Taco Bell is testing a new taco featuring a shell made from nacho cheese-flavored Doritos, a product that is quickly becoming a media star as the chain’s parent company hints of plans to “reinvent the taco” next year.

In a third-quarter call to analysts this week, Yum! Brands Inc. chairman and chief executive David Novak said the company is focusing efforts on turning around disappointing sales at Taco Bell, the company’s largest and most profitable chain in the United States.

Novak promised “market-tested, category-breakthrough innovation” to re-energize the Taco Bell brand by the end of the first quarter next year.

Company officials were shy to confirm whether the new Doritos Locos Taco is part of that so-called innovation.

“We’re excited about the positive consumer response to Doritos Locos Tacos, which is currently in test markets in Bakersfield, Fresno and Toledo,” said Rob Poetsch, a spokesman for the chain. “It’s highly innovative because it combines two classic favorites that people love. When we know it’s perfect, we’ll bring it to market.”

Well, without even market testing the thing, I can tell you right now that a Nacho Cheese Doritos-flavored corn tortilla stuffed with seasoned meat and cheese is about as close to a sure thing as the next Lindsay Lohan DUI.

Faster, please. And if Michelle Obama gives you any shit, tell her you’re doing your part for comprehensive immigration reform — and that she needs to step off, lest that little Taco Bell doggie decides to slap a bitch.

(h/t a fine scotch)

47 Replies to “"Taco Bell looks to 'reinvent the taco'"”

  1. motionview says:

    What innovation starvation? A Transformed Taco for a Transformed America! Thank you Dear Leader.

  2. happyfeet says:

    Jack in the Box tacos are still as awesomely tasty as they are mysterious

  3. bh says:

    Bring on the Cool Ranch taco!

  4. sdferr says:

    Damn, Steve Jobs made a world-record fast turn-around of his re-incarnation business, wot? Like he was all made of faster than light neutrinos, getting where he needed to go before he even left where he was.

  5. bh says:

    My friend says those have American cheese, ‘feets.

    That’s just wrong.

  6. Darleen says:

    eh … sorry, the only “fast food” taco I buy is from Miguel’s Jr.

  7. happyfeet says:

    but they’re soooo good

    I don’t have a Miguel’s Jr. in my zone

    also Gugu’s Tacos are really really tasty British people can be so mean

  8. dicentra says:

    The Taco Smell nearest my house is all shuttered up.

    I don’t understand anything anymore.

  9. Pablo says:

    Bakersfield? Fresno? Toledo? WHAT ABOUT THE 99 PERCENT!?!?!?!?

  10. […] and faith based curriculum GET YOUR FREE PASS TODAY. CLICK HERE NOW Selected excerpt FROM: https://proteinwisdom.com/?p=31123 Sponsor- Bible Island at BibleIslands.com is your home for Kids Bible Stories told through the […]

  11. LBascom says:

    My daughter recently quit her job at Taco Bell in Fresno(second job, her other one became full time). She’s tasted it.

    Apparently, none of us that haven’t has really lived.

    We don’t know true happiness, much less ecstasy. The sky’s are less blue, and flowers withhold their true essence from us. We’re less quick with a smile, and the twinkle in our eye lacks a facet.

    Pretty damn good taco, is what I heard.

  12. McGehee says:

    The flavor of Doritos I’ve been buying has been the resurrection of the old taco-flavor in the retro bag.

    I wonder if Taco Bell is open to having a taco-flavor taco?

  13. sdferr says:

    Given the thought, I’m fairly sure this is doable in the home kitchen, though obviously troublesome in the execution (God blessed economies of scale and there ain’t nothin’ we can do about it). Still, I think I may give it a go, shaking a fist, so to speak.

  14. McGehee says:

    To be honest, I think I’d be more likely to eat at Taco Bell if their combo menus made more sense.

    Then again, maybe they are more sensible now, and I just haven’t gone there in so long that I don’t know about it. Anyway, my wife and I tend to go to sit-down Mexican restaurants instead.

  15. cranky-d says:

    Taco Bell changes its menu every six months. If you haven’t been there in years, you’ve missed many an iteration of their offerings.

  16. McGehee says:

    Not years, but quite a while. We even have a Taco Bell close to home now. I don’t know why I don’t enjoy going there like I used to, but that menu board is always the first reminder that this isn’t the Taco Bell I used to enjoy going to.

  17. McGehee says:

    They’re getting too gimmicky, is part of it — oddly enough, this new “re-invented” taco thing is just one more example.

  18. LBascom says:

    Yeah McGehee, I can’t remember the last time I ate at Taco Bell. I think it was to try the new one they came out with; a corn taco slathered with refried beans and a flour tortilla stuck around that. Very good and easy to do at home.

    One thing we gots in the central valley is authentic Mexican food. The best is out of the taco truck parked in a rural intersection corner. If you can say “carne asada tacos” and hold up three fingers, it’s like eating in Oaxaca.

    I’ll try a dorito one if it makes it’s way into the hinterland though.

  19. Spiny Norman says:

    Taco Bell has been aggressively going after the “Youth Market” for some time, so this seems a no-brainer. They probably had this in mind for some time and only recently worked out a licensing agreement with Frito-Lay.

    Yeah, McGehee, their menu board is a confusing jumble, and I agree, it isn’t the Taco Bell I loved when I was a kid.

  20. cranky-d says:

    Taco bell had a really good chicken wrap of some kind many years ago. I really liked it, so naturally they dropped it. I haven’t been there since, but these days the only time I eat fast food is at the Minneapolis airport.

  21. A fine scotch says:

    Just confirmed with the local (Longmont, Colorado) Taco Bell that these things exist and may be rolled out next year.

    They were test marketed in Ohio this year and sold out within 2 hours every day.

  22. Seth says:

    I vote for “I wonder if Taco Bell is open to having a taco-flavor taco?” as comment of the day.

  23. A fine scotch says:

    Seconded, Seth.

  24. A fine scotch says:

    My wife loves Taco Bell so much she was excited to get back from our honeymoon (in Zihuatanejo, MEXICO) and have a “real” (her word) taco at Taco Bell.

  25. happyfeet says:

    Taco Bell has a male skew as well I think I remember – it’s a young guy place

    but NG likes it too so we go to the one over by Warner Bros sometimes

    she always spends less than $5 and I always spend over $10 and she always tells me I’m doing it wrong

  26. DarthLevin says:

    I like the “taco in a bag” they serve up at the Little League park: Snack-size bag of Fritos, dump in some onions, shredded cheese, and a ladle or two of chili-dog topping. Drop in a spoon and it’s surprisingly tasty eating. More so with a few smuggled beers in you (but then what isn’t)?

  27. alppuccino says:

    I hate to be the one to break this to Taco Bell, but Doritos don’t bend.

  28. happyfeet says:

    frito pie yay I love that but I like diced tomatoes and sour cream on it too and also some cilantro

  29. No. The Doritos, they do not bend. They will never bend. You cannot make the Doritos not a Doritos. Some day, when all around you are Fritos and Tostitos, the bland, the greasy and the scooped… you will call for the return of the Doritos, and the Doritos will hear you. The Doritos will return… oh yes… they will return…

  30. They may be nacho…or cool ranch… or even baked. But they will never be soft. The days of the 3D Doritos are over, my friend… We will be thin, and crispy, and wild with flavor. You cannot fold us! You can put us in smaller and smaller bags, yes, but even the smallest of crumbs will taste of greatness… The fingers of future generations will forever be tasting of the soul of the Doritos… Now go… go and try to satisfy your munchies with lightly salted generic restaurant-style tortilla chips and weak, watery cooked salsa… It is the right thing to do… But know this! Somewhere, impacted in the farthest molar from the front, is a tiny crumb… a crumb that cannot be sucked out or softened… a crumb of…the Doritos!

  31. leigh says:

    That is a frito pie deluxe, happy. At least that’s what we call them here in Oklahoma.

  32. sdferr says:

    But they will never be soft.

    Aha! A competitive angle then, cause mine will.

  33. cranky-d says:

    Normal Taco Bell taco shells don’t bend either, DZ. You shall be assimilated.

  34. JD says:

    Ima gunna go to Toledo next week.

  35. LBascom says:

    I bet I could eat like 10 of them.

    And then just laugh and laugh.

    A perhaps take a nap.

  36. Abe Froman says:

    When all your food is different variations based on like five ingredients, you knew this had to happen eventually.

  37. Entropy says:

    Taco Bell is testing a new taco featuring a shell made from nacho cheese-flavored Doritos

    Eww.

  38. Entropy says:

    I live in Chicago, screw that stuff. I pass a taco bell on my way to El Gallo Tapatio. There’s guys all over selling tacos out of trucks that taste better than the excuse Pepsi invented to get their cola into fast food stores.

  39. happyfeet says:

    deluxe! I love it

  40. LTC John says:

    Aii I know is that if I ever get into a jam where I need wit to bail me out – I am sending e-tickets to Jeff, McGehee and LMC…

    I damn near cried with joy reading this post and comments #12, #29 and #30.

  41. LTC John says:

    “All”, that is

  42. Spiny Norman says:

    …the excuse Pepsi invented to get their cola into fast food stores.

    Huh?

    Glen Bell founded Taco Bell in 1962, in Downey, CA. That first one is still there, and is the one I used to eat at when I was a kid, in the late ’60s. Bell sold the franchise to Pepsi in 1978.

  43. dicentra says:

    Isn’t Taco Bell the only place you can get that aqua-colored Mountain Dew?

    Good stuff.

  44. DarthLevin says:

    JD: Is your journey to the Glass City punishment or self-imposed penance?

    Regardless, hie thee to The Beirut on Monroe Street. Fatoush and chicken shwarma that will make you want to put smugglers compartments in your largest vehicle so’s you can take enough home to last a year.

  45. Sarah Rolph says:

    Calling Rachel Lucas!

  46. Sarah Rolph says:

    You guys are killing me:

    “sit-down Mexican restaurants”, “El Gallo Tapatio”

    California-raised, living in New England. Sigh.

    (next weekend I will be in Northern California where you can get a beer and a REAL taco for under five bucks, with free chips and salsa; see you at Taqueria San Jose on positively Fourth Street in San Rafael)

  47. McGehee says:

    I have yet to travel north of the Potomac so I haven’t quite been everywhere, but I can’t remember ever being somewhere that didn’t have a decent sit-down Mexican place. Certainly not here in Georgia, nor even in the itty bitty town in eastern Tennessee where my wife was born.

Comments are closed.