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Kerry:  “Bush lied. Allawi is a liar and a puppet.  Iraq is Vietnam.  And bumbling American troops are creating chaos in Iraq.  Now.  Who wants a fudge pop?”

Fox News:

Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry said Thursday that Iraq’s Ayad Allawi was sent before Congress to put the “best face” on a Bush administration policy that has gone wrong.

Shortly after Allawi, the interim government’s prime minister, gave a rosy portrayal of progress toward peace in Iraq, Kerry said the assessment contradicted Allawi’s own statements as well as the reality on the ground.

“I think the prime minister is, obviously, contradicting his own statement of a few days ago, where he said the terrorists are pouring into the country,” Kerry said. “The prime minister and the president are here obviously to put their best face on the policy, but the fact is that the CIA estimates, the reporting, the ground operations and the troops all tell a different story.”

Kerry went on to compare Iraq to Vietnam, himself to Patton, and George Bush to a “confused little monkey,” before concluding his statement with a black power salute and a booming cry of “word to your mother!”—whatever the hell that means.

12 Replies to “Kerry:  “Bush lied. Allawi is a liar and a puppet.  Iraq is Vietnam.  And bumbling American troops are creating chaos in Iraq.  Now.  Who wants a fudge pop?””

  1. rick says:

    Right on, brother. Kerry is So much groovier than Bush, I can’t imagine how anyone wouldn’t, like, vote for him, man. Bush is like, so square.

    Oh, wait – it IS the 21st century! Sorry. I’m lost in a 30-odd year old quagmire or something.

  2. RC says:

    Yeah, that John F’ng Kerry is quite the diplomat and will patch up our “weak” foreign relationships.

    What a tactless boob (apologies to all other boobs out there).

  3. kbiel says:

    How the hell would John Kerry know what Allawi said to Congres?!?  Did he actually show up for a session?  I doubt it, it would have been the news story of the day if he had.

  4. Brandon says:

    Can I still have a fudge pop?

  5. SarahW says:

    “the ground operations and the troops all tell a different story”

    As in STFU, Kerry, you’re gonna get us killed.

    Does it cross anyone else’s mind that it’s not a good idea to telegraph to the enemy “if you act up as much as you can in the next several weeks, kill lots of soldiers and wreak lots of havoc, I’ll get elected and stop fighting you.”

    That’s Kerry’s vaunted win/win diplomacy.

  6. Bill in CO says:

    SarahW: your post made it all clear!  We keep hearing from the left how Kerry’s Vietnam experience has prepared him to lead the country in a time of war.  What they fail to say as clearly as you did is that his experience is in cutting and running at the first opportunity, then aiding the enemy by removing public support and thus condemning millions (in Vietnam and Cambodia anyway) to death.

    He’s great at leading in times of war.  Just for the other side.

  7. Silicon Valley Jim says:

    You failed to note that the good Senator said those things in French.

    By the way, he served in Vietnam.  So there.

  8. Bill in CO says:

    SVJ:

    Bush s’est trouvé. Allawi est un menteur et une marionnette. L’Irak est le Vietnam. Et les troupes Américaines gaffantes créent le chaos en Irak. Maintenant. Qui veut un bruit de fondant?

    Just rolls off the tongue.

    (The truth: I used babelfish)

  9. MaDr says:

    I’ve heard so many explanations of what the “F” of Kerry’s middle name stands for.  It just dawned on me – it’s for Fifth.  As in Fifth Column.

  10. Dean Esmay says:

    It reminds me of how Wendell Willkie, Barry Goldwater, and Bob Dole promised not to use the war as an issue in order to cynically win votes when they were running against a Democratic incumbent.

    Only Kerry’s doing the exact opposite.

    Well it didn’t work out for them. Do you think the doing the opposite will work out for Kerry?

  11. TomB says:

    Did Edwards have anything to say about how the bunnies felt about all this?

  12. Bill, never reveal when you can impress. tongue wink

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