“It was a strange place to sleep. But for some reason known only to her, a woman who regularly wandered the Ridgemont subdivision in far southwest Houston decided to lie down beneath a pickup outside somebody else’s house,” the Houston Chronicle reports.

That ill-fated decision cost the woman her life early Thursday. The truck owner, not knowing anyone was under his vehicle, left his driveway to go to work. The truck ran over the woman and dragged her body 12 to 15 feet out into the street.

The 44-year-old woman, whose name was not released, was dead by the time she hit the road. She may have been dead before the truck ran over her. An autopsy will have to answer that question.

Okay. And while they’re at it, you think the doctors performing the autopsy would mind poking around those opening paragraphs for some clues as to what the writer was thinking? I mean, “it was a strange place to sleep”…? “…for some reason known only to her…”? “Ill-fated decision”?

The only thing missing is, “‘Twas a dark and stormy night…”

Uh, just the fact’s, ma’am. Please. M’kay?

(Rrrrrrrrettttch)