Toledo – “Nick and Sarah Arena gave birth to a baby boy early Thursday morning at St. Luke’s Hospital. They’re huge Detroit Red Wings fans, so when they found out they were having a boy, they decided to name him Joe Louis…as in the stadium where the Wings play. Add in thier [sic] last name and he’s Joe Louis Arena.”

‘When I started watching the Red Wings, I put two and two together and I thought that would be a good name for me. I kinda wish it was my name, so this is a good opportunity for me to show my spirit,’ says Nick Arena.

‘Some people think you can’t do that to a baby, but most people start laughing right away and they think its a really cool thing,’ says Sarah Arena.

…And by “most people,” Sarah Arena is of course referring to the three other members of her bowling team. Because everybody else in the world thinks she and her husband are sad, silly assholes.

Prediction: When little Joe Louis Arena reaches 14-years of age, he’ll curse out his mother, get into a fistfight with his father, and take to drinking and skipping school. By 20, he’ll be married to a 17-year old girl he knocked up named Terri, and Joe and Terri will live with their two kids, Joe Jr. and Donna, in a Toledo trailer park.

Any mention of hockey will be forbidden in the Joe Louis Arena trailer.