In the comments section to a post by Instaputz on my post immediately below. I’ll not link it, because there’s nothing of note to see over there, but really, I think that being lectured by a guy who sits in his own piss all day telling other people that they’re stinky, it’s a bit much.
The debate (which in this case would be a euphemism for much flinging of monkey poo), would go something like this. Yes, I’m a terrible person for having laughed. I imagine that you didn’t laugh when George’s fiancee on Seinfeld died from poisoning as a result of licking wedding envelopes.
–Yes, but that was a fictional character! Don’t you know the difference?
And I’m sure that you’ve never laughed at any Darwin Awards.
–Those are given to stupid people! Stupid people deserve what they get!
I see, so I’m a sociopath. Is Bill Clinton a sociopath for getting his cock sucked in the Oval Office by a chubby intern?
–It’s about sex! Those matters are private!
Is Eliot Spitzer, who got off with no charges while his madam had to plead, a sociopath who now has a column at Slate?
–It’s also about sex! Hasn’t he suffered enough?
Did you snigger when Novak announced he had a brain tumor?
–Well, if I did (and I’m not saying I did!) he deserved it! He outed super-secret agent Valerie Plame!
Was it a tragedy when Senator Kennedy announced he had a brain tumor? He killed Mary Jo Kopechne.
–That was 40 years ago! Can’t you let it go, you SOCIOPATH?
Obama let his Nigerian Kenyan half brother live in squalor while he inhabited an enormous house in a nice neighborhood. Is that sociopathic?
–Bullshit!
Rangel?
–That’s financial stuff! He didn’t hurt anyone! STALKER!
Palin’s wardrobe?
—{indecipherable gibberish punctuated with monkey poo}
All very enlightening, I’m sure. But I think I know why I laughed: it has something to do with the grotesquerie. Oh, and thanks for the concern with my mental hygiene.
You may be a sociopath, Dan, but you’re our sociopath.
Thanks, Carin. I knew there was a lesson in there, somewhere. ;-P
Did you snigger
SNACIST!
Oh, yeah, and I got called a SNACIST over there, too, because she was a Filipina. God, how I loathe that Malkin.
Actually, I get a kick out of the people who appear out of the woodwork to criticize posts they find offends their sensibilities.
Gotta do something about that woodwork before Jeff gets back.
The other guys never have a sense of humor, do they?
I can score you some chlordane, if you’re interested. Hypothetically.
It’s one of those things about other guys that’s most annoying, Slart.
Please. I can’t find any pills at all behind the sofas. I accidentally kinda tipped over the breakfront.
Given the option, I’d rather be a sociopath than a putz. Just sayin’.
There was a news story, years back, that went like this:
1) Guy crashes his car on icy road.
2) Ambulance arrives on scene, loads up victim.
3) Second ambulance arrives on scene, skids on ice, hits first ambulance.
4) Victim is ejected through through open rear door of ambulance.
5) Third ambulance arrives, skids on ice, strikes and kills victim.
The victim was of unspecified race, so at least I’m not racist (unless he wasn’t, in fact, white, in which case I am).
That’s a toughie. You’re probably a sociopath, but not a racist. Unless you imagined that the victim had more melanin than you.
What’s funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume.
3730 This Absolon gan wype his mouth ful drie.
This Absolon wiped his mouth very dry.
3731 Derk was the nyght as pich, or as the cole,
Dark was the night as pitch, or as the coal,
3732 And at the wyndow out she putte hir hole,
And at the window out she put her hole,
3733 And Absolon, hym fil no bet ne wers,
And Absolon, to him it happened no better nor worse,
3734 But with his mouth he kiste hir naked ers
But with his mouth he kissed her naked ass
3735 Ful savourly, er he were war of this.
With great relish, before he was aware of this.
3736 Abak he stirte, and thoughte it was amys,
Back he jumped, and thought it was amiss,
3737 For wel he wiste a womman hath no berd.
For well he knew a woman has no beard.
3738 He felte a thyng al rough and long yherd,
He felt a thing all rough and long haired,
3739 And seyde, “Fy! allas! what have I do?”
And said, “Fie! alas! what have I done?”
3740 “Tehee!” quod she, and clapte the wyndow to,
“Tehee!” said she, and clapped the window to,
3741 And Absolon gooth forth a sory pas.
And Absolon goes forth walking sadly.
3742 “A berd! A berd!” quod hende Nicholas,
“A beard! A beard!” said clever Nicholas,
3743 “By Goddes corpus, this goth faire and weel.”
“By God’s body, this goes fair and well.”
3744 This sely Absolon herde every deel,
This hapless Absolon heard every bit,
3745 And on his lippe he gan for anger byte,
And on his lip he began for anger to bite,
3746 And to hymself he seyde, “I shal thee quyte.”
And to himself he said, “I shall pay thee back.”
3747 Who rubbeth now, who froteth now his lippes
Who rubs now, who now scrubs his lips
3748 With dust, with sond, with straw, with clooth, with chippes,
With dust, with sand, with straw, with cloth, with chips,
3749 But Absolon, that seith ful ofte, “Allas!”
But Absolon, who says very often, “Alas!”
3750 “My soule bitake I unto Sathanas,
“My soul I entrust to Satan,
3751 But me were levere than al this toun,” quod he,
If I would not rather than (have) all this town,” said he,
3752 “Of this despit awroken for to be.
“Be avenged for this insult.
3753 Allas,” quod he, “allas, I ne hadde ybleynt!”
Alas,” said he, “alas, I did not turn away!”
3754 His hoote love was coold and al yqueynt;
His hot love was cold and all extinguished;
3755 For fro that tyme that he hadde kist hir ers,
For from that time that he had kissed her ass,
3756 Of paramours he sette nat a kers,
Love-making he thought not worth not a watercress,
3757 For he was heeled of his maladie.
For he was healed of his malady.
3758 Ful ofte paramours he gan deffie,
Very often he did renounce love-making,
3759 And weep as dooth a child that is ybete.
And wept as does a child that is beaten.
3760 A softe paas he wente over the strete
At a slow pace he went down the street
3761 Until a smyth men cleped daun Gerveys,
To a smith men called Dan Gerveys,
3762 That in his forge smythed plough harneys;
Who in his forge made plowing equipment;
3763 He sharpeth shaar and kultour bisily.
He sharpens ploughshares and plough blades busily.
3764 This Absolon knokketh al esily,
This Absolon knocked all gently,
3765 And seyde, “Undo, Gerveys, and that anon.”
And said, “Open up, Gerveys, and that right now.”
3766 “What, who artow?” “It am I, Absolon.”
“What, who art thou?” “It am I, Absolon.”
3767 “What, Absolon! for Cristes sweete tree,
“What, Absolon! for Christ’s sweet cross,
3768 Why rise ye so rathe? Ey, benedicitee!
Why rise you so early? Ay, bless me!
3769 What eyleth yow? Som gay gerl, God it woot,
What ails yow? Some pretty girl, God knows it,
3770 Hath broght yow thus upon the viritoot.
Hath brought you to be running around like this.
3771 By Seinte Note, ye woot wel what I mene.”
By Saint Note, you know well what I mean.”
3772 This Absolon ne roghte nat a bene
This Absolon cared not a bean
3773 Of al his pley; no word agayn he yaf;
For all his joking; no word he gave in reply;
3774 He hadde moore tow on his distaf
He had more business on hand
3775 Than Gerveys knew, and seyde, “Freend so deere,
Than Gerveys knew, and said, “Friend so dear,
3776 That hoote kultour in the chymenee heere,
That hot plough blade in the hearth here,
3777 As lene it me; I have therwith to doone,
Lend it to me; I have something to do with it,
3778 And I wol brynge it thee agayn ful soone.”
And I will bring it back to thee very soon.”
3779 Gerveys answerde, “Certes, were it gold,
Gerveys answered, “Certainly, were it gold,
3780 Or in a poke nobles alle untold,
Or in a sack countless silver coins,
3781 Thou sholdest have, as I am trewe smyth.
Thou sholdest have it, as I am true smith.
3782 Ey, Cristes foo! What wol ye do therwith?”
Ay, Christ’s foe! What will you do with it?”
3783 “Therof,” quod Absolon, “be as be may.
“Concerning that,” said Absolon, “be as be may.
3784 I shal wel telle it thee to-morwe day” —
I shall well tell it to thee to-morrow” —
3785 And caughte the kultour by the colde stele.
And caught the plough blade by the cold handle.
3786 Ful softe out at the dore he gan to stele,
Very softly out at the door he began to steal,
3787 And wente unto the carpenteris wal.
And went unto the carpenter’s wall.
3788 He cogheth first, and knokketh therwithal
He coughs first, and knocks then
3789 Upon the wyndowe, right as he dide er.
Upon the window, just as he did before.
3790 This Alison answerde, “Who is ther
This Alison answered, “Who is there
3791 That knokketh so? I warante it a theef.”
That knocks so? I swear it is a thief.”
3792 “Why, nay,” quod he, “God woot, my sweete leef,
“Why, nay,” said he, “God knows, my sweet beloved,
3793 I am thyn Absolon, my deerelyng.
I am thy Absolon, my darling.
3794 Of gold,” quod he, “I have thee broght a ryng.
Of gold,” said he, “I have brought thee a ring.
3795 My mooder yaf it me, so God me save;
My mother gave it to me, as God may save me;
3796 Ful fyn it is, and therto wel ygrave.
Very fine it is, and also nicely engraved.
3797 This wol I yeve thee, if thou me kisse.”
This will I give thee, if thou kiss me.”
3798 This Nicholas was risen for to pisse,
This Nicholas was risen to piss,
3799 And thoughte he wolde amenden al the jape;
And thought he would make the joke even better;
3800 He sholde kisse his ers er that he scape.
He should kiss his ass before he escapes.
3801 And up the wyndowe dide he hastily,
And he opened up the window hastily,
3802 And out his ers he putteth pryvely
And he puts out his ass stealthily
3803 Over the buttok, to the haunche-bon;
Over the buttock, to the thigh;
3804 And therwith spak this clerk, this Absolon,
And then spoke this clerk, this Absolon,
3805 “Spek, sweete bryd, I noot nat where thou art.”
“Speak, sweet bird, I know not where thou art.”
3806 This Nicholas anon leet fle a fart
This Nicholas immediately let fly a fart
3807 As greet as it had been a thonder-dent,
As great as if it had been a thunder-bolt,
3808 That with the strook he was almoost yblent;
So that with the stroke he was almost blinded;
3809 And he was redy with his iren hoot,
And he was ready with his hot iron,
3810 And Nicholas amydde the ers he smoot.
And he smote Nicholas in the middle of the ass.
3811 Of gooth the skyn an hande-brede aboute,
Off goes the skin a hand’s breadth about,
3812 The hoote kultour brende so his toute,
The hot plough blade so burned his rump
3813 And for the smert he wende for to dye.
And for the pain he thought he would die.
3814 As he were wood, for wo he gan to crye,
As if he were crazy, for woe he began to cry,
3815 “Help! Water! Water! Help, for Goddes herte!”
“Help! Water! Water! Help, for God’s heart!”
Honestly? I thought the mirth over the story was tasteless.
Well I do not see anyone arguing that it is not tasteless. Doesn’t make someone a sociopath though. If people that throw an odd joke or two out at a car accident were sociopath’s all then the jails would be full.
Completely off topic, but I am going to be in Austin, TX next week. Any of you Texas folks want to try to get together?
I can’t argue with you, Rob, but I asked the question, “Why did I laugh”? Is it because I am a compassionless sociopath, do you think? What kinds of laughter, without perhaps getting too Freudian about it, are there?
Black humor isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. That doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with it. Ask your favorite soldier.
Or EMT.
Wanna get a real good laugh go and look at this article and realize all these people still have jobs. Now that is some gallows humor.
http://www.dispatch.com/live/content/local_news/stories/2008/12/05/copy/vanessa.ART_ART_12-05-08_A1_NQC4TEM.html?type=rss&cat=&sid=101
I love you Dan Collins
I think it’s that whole thin line between tragedy and comedy thing.
In addition, it just has that whole black comedy feel. As if it were written for a movie. That’s prolly why Dan laughed.
Not because he found the real event funny.
I’ll take it, Alexandra.
Consider yourselves denounced. Denounced and condemned.
Comment by Pablo on 12/5 @ 8:26 am #
Black humor isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. That doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with it. Ask your favorite soldier
By the end of my deployment I would keep playing Xbox when I heard a mortar or maybe take the time to say “excuse me” like I farted when we heard one. Really nothing else you can do in some situations other than find sick humor.
I just got a call from the Papal Denuncio.
Who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscovere’d country, from whose bourn
No traveller returns, puzzles the will,
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
It’s simply another case of the left’s subjectivism…
If it’s either a reference to one of their heroes or statements by someone who doesn’t share their ideology, then regardless of circumstance, irony, or karmic rectitude, any levity is sociopathic-or simply divisive hate-speech. That’s why the late night comics strangely find nothing they can joke about when it cimes to Obama…
But, if it’s someone who they oppose, well then it’s Chimeror BusHitlerBurton, wishing death on Cheney, applauding Novak’s tumor, or celebrating the death of Tony Snow; anything goes amongst the tolerant, free expression, crowd. How they especially love the taste of schadendreude…
And Carin is right about the way the nutroots come out if the woodwork. Are they getting O! style action alerts! from Kos or something..? I mean, he is the Ernst Rohm of the O! brownshirts, is he not? In which case, I can only pray for the coming night if the long knives…
Mrs. DarthRove, who happens to be an emergency physician, sees some pretty bad things that are rather horrible. The only way to cope with it is to objectify and make jokes, sometimes coarse and heartless jokes that would sound sociopathic, nay meeeean-spirited (the worst thing a Rethuglikkkan can be called short of racistsexisthomophobeplanetkillerbigot).
For instance: A 19-20 year old fellow came into Mrs DR’s hospital one day. He’d been hunting, was a bit careless, and discharged his shotgun into a rock not far in front of him. Being loaded with what I’m told was a deer slug, the ricochet caught the poor boy in the crotch, splitting his danglies in twain. Mrs DR went into the lad’s room to make sure he was in no immediate danger of expiring, looked under the cover to examine the damage and promptly said, “Yeah, I don’t do plumbing,” then went to fetch a reconstructive urologist. She takes great pleasure in telling this story while I roll around holding myself in sympathetic pain saying, “Stop it, stop it!!!”
Is it pathological to stalk someone on an internet comments thread in order to denounce that someone for sociopatic tendencies?
Because if it is I don’t want to be sane!
This Absolon gan wype his mouth ful drie
In an odd bit of synchronicity, I just ran across this video of the Danish Navy ship Absalon sinking a Somali pirate boat.
Carin, I think people who are offended by other people’s sense of humor are retarded.
The Collins and Heisenberg Principle–
There are things that are so serious that you can only laugh about it.
In a three foot wave, hold your friends close and your bride closer.
At some level we all are required to confront the reality that our lives are unfair and short.
Our lives are lived in a physical world that is not controlable or controled. You laughed as an expression dismay, concern and anxiety. The view from the pinnacle is that of the abyss.
I’m not sure you’re a sociopath, but the whole moral equivalence, “you’re as bad as I am” defense lacks grace and merit. I’m not exactly sure when it became so fashionable to defend one’s self from an accusation with a fictional conversation on the accuser….and I’m pretty sure, despite the love and warm feelings Governor Palin causes amongst you, that equating the criticism of her wardrobe and make-up amongst the lefties is not exactly equal to a woman being swept out to sea.
But, hey, who really cares…if a moral equivalence argument is not a good defense (my assertion), then a bunk, fictional moral equivalence argument is still silly. Degrees of difference and not kind, I guess.
Words of comfort from LauraW at AOSpades HQ –
“Hey, it’s no one’s fault that there’s funny ways to die. The best we can do is try not to crack up during the eulogy.”
congratulations on your new job and stuff JD! glad you are back in business and all …
the most tragical one in modern history was that somewhat neurotic I guess British teen guy what deodoranted himself to death … it wasn’t funny but it was definitely not a there but for the grace of god way to go … he kinda owns that one I think
but my sense Dan this is just another one of those things white people like things … they like to be shocked and express their shockedness so they feel all delineated as normative and good … you just have to bear with them cause this need comes from an empty place I think. I think it’s related to binge eating but someone would have to study that I think.
Now, as a non-anthropomorphic source of all evil, I laugh at it all…
But seriously, there are events so “out there,” in terms of the facts or circumstances of said events, that are so ludicrous that the only rational response is to laugh.
Remember — comedy is when you slip on a banana peel… tragedy is when I get a splinter. (Mel Brooks)
In a completely unrelated universe, Rush opened his show today saying that we’re all in a sitcom that God has written, and as evidence cited various stories, including the fate of this unlucky woman.
He also was berating himself for finding it funny. So you’re in good company, Dan.
Swept Away; The Proposing Mariner and the Ingestion of the Other the new fictionalized and heavily nuanced dark comedy from thor.
It’s a story worth telling, I feel.
“I’ve found out why people laugh. They laugh because it hurts… because it’s the only thing that’ll make it stop hurting.”
Michael Valentine Smith in Stranger in a Strange Land
-Robert A. Heinlein
I like this version better:
“Tragedy is if I cut my finger. Comedy is if you fall into an open manhole and die.”
-Mel Brooks
Was she 93 pounds soaking wet?
Dan
I’d have thrown you a life raft there, but if it looked like it was going to hit you, the last thing you’d of heard before your untimely but welcomed (by your loving lefty friends) death was me laughing.
What part of “doh!” isn’t funny?
I’ve heard my friends laughing when I was still frickin airborne. Then they ate all my hospital food and tried to get the nurses into the shower stall.
Then they left me to deal with the aftermath of the comfort of their visit…
Does remind me that my wife needs how to learn to swim
Thanks, Steve.
I promise never to steal your wallet while you’re being medivacked.
Why be the outsider?
It’s not like I’d need the money for a few days or weeks and this whole is so “upsetting” that you’ll need beer and tequila
I personally didn’t find it funny, but both hubby and I did find the incident to be rather suspicious, frankly. I hope they are investigating the circumstances and not just trust the fiance’s characterization of events.
However, I do think it’s such an odd story that I can see how some would find it funny.
I don’t think you’re a sociopath, Dan, just a bitter, insecure loser who desperately needs to get some. You don’t have to be mad at the rest of the world just because women run from you. Just take a deep breath and try to keep the rage at a slow simmer. Maybe you’ll find someone as desperate and lonely as you.
[…] probably be denominated a sociopath again, but here […]