“What are those, behind the reeds? Are those ducks?”
Billy didn’t hesitate. “Without a doubt. Ducks.”
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Uh, whut?
I like the reeds. Nice touch.
one of my dogs had surgery yesterday and I have to pick her up today after dropping my son off at school. Wife is away on a business trip — and my other dog figures to be sniffy and mouthfully curious around any kind of dressing on surgically-repaired dog’s leg.
Which means I’ll have to closely monitor the situation. Which leads me to adopt frivolity today. As a way of coping.
Plenty of stuff over at the Pub, though.
If it walks, looks, or quacks like a duck……… shoot it.
I hate ducks.
Because of the intentionalism.
Billy Jack? Billy Carter? Billy Barty? Billy Bob Thornton? Billy Idol? Billy Graham? Billy Joel? Billy Martin? Billy Zane? Billy Ray Cyrus?
Damn, that’s a big hole to fill in.
Fulvous whistling?
So is the itching healing finger syndrome gone by now or lingering yet?
Frivolity is highly underrated I think. More people should try it.
Billy – don’t get complacent. Could be a DBIED. I suggest you cordon off the area and see if anyone from Task Force Troy is in the area. Or at least call a route clearance team… Don’t forget to call in your 9-line UXO report. We’ll make sure we load your observations into CIDNE. Thanks Billy.
Billy was wrong, however. They were ocelots afflicted by some strange mallardy.
whee! I didn’t get the 9 extra minutes of sleep after hitting the snooze alarm this morning because Roxie, the german shepherd mix, needed an escort to the water dish because maggie the tabby terror usually lies in wait for her there. I shouldn’t have to referee that one. especially at seven in the morning.
now, if maggie were a duck? Roxie would chomp her without a second thought.
I dreamed my attic was full of kittens.
Yeah, but why can’t you tell me viaduct?
I went up there to get a box, and there were kittens. Big kittens, new kittens, cat’s with kittens, kittens having kittens; I wasn’t really sure how to handle the situation.
Now I know – duct tape.
Your dog will probably get one of those plastic funnels place on its coller to keep it from licking the stitches. Ours had one and it was funny to watch her eat – a bowl of food, the funnel coming down and engulfing the bowl, the funnel going up, and all the food is gone.
Sarah W. – Duck tape – keeps everything from quacking.
There now, there is a solution. Duct-tape a cone on the head of the dog with the good legs, too.
Who says you have to have surgery to get the head-cone.
Win-win!
Well, maybe you’d have to put netting on the big end of the cone.
Rather more complicated than I anticipated.
Why a duck?
Shotgun?
I denounce myself.
filled with kibble?
AFLAC!!
In other words, “indubitably ducks.”
Finger not yet healed. Much better, but lots of scabbing. And no feeling in the tip.
Andrew Sullivan denounces me for that last…
Practically everything I’ve ever posted here has been frivolous and still I get no repect!
…But there’s a poison I’d like to administer,
You think they’re cuddly, but I think they’re sinister.
Ducks! Ducks! Quack quack! Quack quack!
Could be a smallish goose. Geese are bad — grumpy as hell and they crap everywhere.
Duck down. Duckbill soup. Duckbill platypus. Duck l’Orange.
Mmmmmmmmm. Duck donuts.
“Can’t fool-a me! There is no sanity clause!”
Repect is sort of like building underdeveloped chest muscles all over again?
Duck! Dodge! Hyde!
Duck Cheney
Punctuate as desired.
Regards,
Ric
BJT – killing kittens? A job, perhaps, for a so-flo barfly. But then the fumigation bills. Nosiree, sticky tape.
“And what’s a duck’s beak called, Bill?”
All these bad puns remind me of “Howard the Duck”.
A movie like that would have ended most guy’s careers.
Great, my alma mater plays the Ducks this Sat. How very meta.
oh, shoosh, Kelly, let’s not even go near “riding the ducks”.
oops.
Sarah: Your choice of ammo package.
We saw a merganser on the creek by my sister’s house a couple of weeks ago.
That little bastard was chasing trout in a deep pool, and boy, could he SWIM. Chased a 12 inch trout into the shallows, picked it up and swallowed it whole.
“Ho! Ha-ha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin! Ha! Thrust!â€Â
-Daffy Duck wielding the buck-and-a-quarter staff
Mr. O’Brain: You forgot the inevitable WHAM!!
I’m just glad the ducks weren’t on the wall, know what I mean?
I question the timing.
I went up there to get a box, and there were kittens. Big kittens, new kittens, cats with kittens, kittens having kittens; I wasn’t really sure how to handle the situation.
Dur. You call in the Itty Bitty Kitty Committee.
From NRBQ’s roadie band (The Mother-Fathers) circa 1973 –
“Of all the animals in the zoo,
I hate the fuckin’ duck the most
Because the fuckin’ duck will fuck you,
and then give you a fuckin’ bill”
I think the Mother-Fathers were the first punk band I ever heard.
And they still make me laugh…
and, as an addendum, I used to have ducks until the foxes came.
OMG! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean for that to sound so erotic! Puns are so much fun, I think.
I think you probably hate ducks because you have not thought of wrapping them in “duck” tape to keep them from splitting open when you do that thang to them.
Maybe I should leave now…
Yeah. Pretty definitely.
Later, when cynicism has bowed it’s ugly head…
eeeeee! I luv them! but she won’t have any new kittens for a while. supposedly.
Ducks are tasty.
Ducks are nice.
Ducks are good,
on a bed of rice.
Whale oil beef hooked. M r ducks!