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The Killer Oceans Are Coming [Dan Collins]

“Did asteroids really wipe out the dinosaurs? Scientists* now think rising sea-levels were to blame – and they could threaten our survival too.”

So what led to the rise and fall in sea levels? One explanation is the shift in the Earth’s tectonic plates. The other is climate change. Over the past 500 million years, ice sheets have been forming, advancing, melting and retreating. These vast perturbations in climate change were produced by shifts in Earth’s orbit around the Sun. Geologists say this is natural and normal: we are in a cold phase right now.

However, as we know, after the death of the dinosaurs, one species came to dominate the planet – and it is warming the earth up rather rapidly. The 20th century saw the greatest increase in temperature of any century in the last thousand years. The last decade has been the warmest since records began. “The rate at which we’re changing the climate is unusual,” Peters says, with scientific reticence. “The only similar rate and magnitude of global warming seen in the fossil record was 55 million years ago. Something caused massive amounts of carbon dioxide to be injected into the atmosphere and dramatically altered the climate.”

My guess? Either Bush, or Joooooos, or (most likely) a combination.

*by which I mean a scientist

Marine Families Hard Hit by Extinctions

Extinctions that shaped our planet

Cretaceous-Tertiary, 65 million years ago
Thought to have been aggravated by the impact of large asteroid on the Yucatan peninsula, it led to the death of 16 per cent of marine families and 47 per cent of marine genera, and 18 per cent of land vertebrate families, including the dinosaurs.

End of the Triassic, 200-214 million years ago
This extinction was aggravated by a supervolcano that triggered a rise in sea levels and global temperatures. The death toll included 22 per cent of marine families and 52 per cent of marine genera.

End of the Permian, 250 million years ago
Earth’s worst mass extinction, annihilating 95 per cent of all species, including 53 per cent of marine families, 84 per cent of marine genera and 70 per cent of land species such as plants, insects and vertebrate animals.

Late Devonian, 364 million years ago
About 22 per cent of marine families and 57 per cent of marine genera were lost.

Ordovician-Silurian, 439 million years ago
Sea levels fell as glaciers formed, and then rose as glaciers melted, resulting in the extinction of 25 per cent of marine families and 60 per cent of marine genera.

Semper fi!

43 Replies to “The Killer Oceans Are Coming [Dan Collins]”

  1. Pablo says:

    However, as we know, after the death of the dinosaurs, one species came to dominate the planet – and it is warming the earth up rather rapidly.

    Science! Blech.

  2. dicentra says:

    we are in a cold phase right now.

    Zeus on a zamboni. The cold phase involves a BIT MORE SEA ICE than we currently have, ya moron. The last time we were in an actual cold phase, 10,000 years ago, the place where I am now sitting was under 1000 feet of water.

    Cold phase, my pasty white elbow. An increase of 1°C per century is NORMAL when you’re emerging from the latest ice age.

    I’ve had it with the WARMongers. Off to Antarctica with them, if they can’t take the “heat.”

  3. happyfeet says:

    It’s already rare to see large blue butterflies, badgers and bee orchids.

    Also, muskrats.

  4. dicentra says:

    Or in other words,

    NASA Discovers 70% Of Global Climate Due To Pacific Ocean Oscillations – Not CO2

    Which we’ve known for decades, but post-modern science is determined to make us stupider than before.

    BECAUSE OF THE PROGRESS!

  5. N. O'Brain says:

    “Also, muskrats.”

    Are they in love?

  6. Dan Collins says:

    Please. I can’t think of The Captain without a shudder.

  7. N. O'Brain says:

    Actually, global temps are falling.

    A wonderful site:

    http://wattsupwiththat.wordpress.com/

    That sound you hear is Al Gore’s Gravy Train leaving the station.

  8. N. O'Brain says:

    Tenille? No thrill up MY leg.

  9. kelly says:

    We’re all GONNA DIE!!!!

  10. JD says:

    I thought Baracky already stopped the oceans from rising.

  11. happyfeet says:

    Yes, I saw the bunny. I was deeply affected. It is the soul of imperturbability I think. Very humbling.

  12. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    …”Peters says, with scientific reticence.”

    Ok, I know what ‘scientific’ means. After Googling, I now know what ‘reticence’ means. But, wtf is an opinion given with ‘scientific reticence?’

    Is the author saying Peters flunked highschool chemistry, failed a polygragh? What?

    The next time I fuck up at work, I’m going to tell my boss I made that particular decision with ‘scientific reticence.’

    He played football in college, so I think those two words right next to eachother will scare the shit out of him.

    Yeah, it’ll work.

    I love this site.

  13. Big Bang Hunter (pumping you up) says:

    – You just can’t imagine how impressive it is that “group Left” has discovered that the earths climate changes. Thats got to be worth at least a Nobel.

  14. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “Something caused massive amounts of carbon dioxide to be injected into the atmosphere”…

    (raises hand)

    Solar spike? Comet? Meteor? Lots of volcano activity? A super volcano? 500 million, giant, multi ton reptile like creatures taking HUGE daily, methane shits the size of volkswagens?

    Professor Peters?

  15. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Because I know at some point we’ve all had to yell, ‘GET THAT DINOSAUR OFF MY LAWN!’

    ‘Haven’t you read Peters!?…that triceritops is messin’ up my breatheables. He can go shit in his own yard.’

  16. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    With that, I think I just wrote a script for ‘Squidbillies.’

  17. I think it’s racist to believe dinosaurs don’t swim. they do. And they ski and play hockey too.

    You bastards.

  18. N. O'Brain says:

    Ericlindrosaurus.

    From the Latin for “soft headed lizard”.

  19. TheGeezer says:

    And they ski and play hockey too.

    But can they play hockey underwater?

  20. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Comment by Lost My Cookies on 7/23 @ 1:14 pm #

    I think it’s racist to believe dinosaurs don’t swim. they do. And they ski and play hockey too.

    You bastards.

    The Brontosaurus had a 47′ foot schlong.

    Just like Barack.

    All this dinosaur acting out is just democrat envy on my part.

  21. McGehee says:

    I thought we already knew what killed off the dinosaurs.

    Secondhand smoke.

  22. Obstreperous Infidel says:

    Um, the last decade has not been the warmest. I second reading Wattsupwiththat.com. A great site, indeed.

  23. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “I thought we already knew what killed off the dinosaurs.

    Secondhand smoke.”

    I’ve watched ‘Caveman’ many, many times, and I don’t remember Ringo lighting up.

    But ‘Lar’ has been a smoker forever, so I guess your theory holds water.

  24. BJTex says:

    McGehee is channeling “The Far Side” methinks.

    or not

  25. McGehee says:

    Or maybe it was negative campaigning.

  26. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “McGehee is channeling “The Far Side” methinks.”

    Well a link to Gary Larson would have done wonders.

    It’s been a crappy hump day.

  27. william says:

    You mean to tell me that the earth’s climate has warmed and cooled for HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF YEARS? Why I never…

  28. BJTex says:

    Sorry, Lamont. I couldn’t find a picture of the original cartoon of the “Smoking Dinosaurs.”

  29. mojo says:

    Don’t forget the “Rise of the Oxygen Producing Algae” some 1.5 billion years back.

  30. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “Sorry, Lamont. I couldn’t find a picture of the original cartoon of the “Smoking Dinosaurs.”

    Your forgiven.

    If you come across a picture of some boobs or something, send it my way.

    In the ‘Seven Days’ creation theory, I think Wednesday was the day God made the platapus.

    It was a, ‘SCREW OFF, ALL OF YOU. I’M TIRED’ kinda thing.

    But He got his second wind Thursday, and created the genes that would someday form Pamela Anderson (circa Baywatch), and single malt scotch.

    The above being the two reasons I go to church.

    But I don’t tell the pastor that.

  31. Mikey NTH says:

    The last time we were in an actual cold phase, 10,000 years ago, the place where I am now sitting was under a mile of ice.

    Things change – and I didn’t need a science degree to know that!

    Tenille? No thrill up MY leg.

    I think the platypus was God saying “Watch this – I’m going to drive them nuts figuring THIS one out!”

    But He got his second wind Thursday, and created the genes that would someday form Pamela Anderson (circa Baywatch), and single malt scotch.

    Civilization was worth it, despite mistakes such as David Hasselhoff.

    She was cute back in the day.

  32. Mikey NTH says:

    The “She was cute back in the day” should go under the Tenille quote.

  33. McGehee says:

    Trans-fats…?

  34. Dan Collins says:

    No thrill up MY leg.

    Obviously, you are not a muskrat. SIR.

  35. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “DISCO!”

    A Republican 527 ad with Tony Manero? I dunno…

    …Nah. Bigger fish to fry.

    Tempura.

    I’m gonna go get something to eat.

  36. SevenEleventy says:

    You guys keep reminding me of the seventies, and I’m not going to take responsibility for my comments.

  37. Patrick Carroll says:

    Marines! They give, and they give, and they give!

  38. Mikey NTH says:

    7/11ty

    The seventies were a hard time for all – the time when the response to WTF? was “It’s cool”, and kids learned about decorum by watching old movies on UHF when they were home from school and ill.

    I remember sitting home and watching ‘Bill Kennedy at the Movies’ on WKBD 50 in Detroit, and seeing how adults used to dress and behave, and thinking “Is this what grown-ups look like? Why don’t I see any?”

    Confusing when you are seven years old. Perhaps adults shouldn’t dress like larger kids? Or let children call them by their first names?

  39. Mikey NTH says:

    #39 Patrick – It is usually ’rounds down range’ for the giving.

    Unless you are talking Toys for Tots.

  40. Bleepless says:

    You are very naive. Everybody knows that Bush is a reel maroon and can’t plot anything. Get smart and blame Karl Rove.

  41. McGehee says:

    Karl Rove invented disco?

Comments are closed.