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How John McCain can make inroads with the youth vote [Karl]

The conventional wisdom is that Barack Obama has the youth vote sewn up in a general election.  But in an interview with Williamette Week, Obama gives John McCain an opening:

If you had a tattoo, what would it be and where would you put it?

Uh, I cannot imagine any circumstances in which I would get a tattoo. If a gun was put to my head?

Where has Obama been the last ten years?

Around this time, the popularity of body art and modification catapulted, with 24 percent of American adults owning up to at least one tattoo, according to a 2003 Harris Poll. That jumps to 36 percent for the younger, 18-29 age group.

The Harris poll stated a third of those tattooed got inked up because it made them feel sexier. Other said it made them feel more rebellious.

Reality shows on tattooing such as “Inked,” “Miami Ink” and “LA Ink” have since debuted, driving the industry into the mainstream.

According to New York Times columnist David Brooks:

We now have to work under the assumption that every American has a tattoo. Whether we are at a formal dinner, at a professional luncheon, at a sales conference or arguing before the Supreme Court, we have to assume that everyone in the room is fully tatted up — that under each suit, dress or blouse, there is at least a set of angel wings, a barbed wire armband, a Chinese character or maybe even a fully inked body suit. We have to assume that any casual antitattoo remark will cause offense, even to those we least suspect of self-marking.

Clearly, Obama has made a serious gaffe that McCain can exploit — and earn some free media — by driving the Straight-Talk Express to the nearest tattoo parlor.

McLaughlin/Allahpundit-esque exit question: What kind of tattoo should McCain get, and where should he put it?  I’m thinking big anchors on his forearms to pump up his Popeye factor, but there are several other obvious choices out there.

45 Replies to “How John McCain can make inroads with the youth vote [Karl]”

  1. Ouroboros says:

    and of course, the glyphs on the back of our necks are how we Vampires recognize our kind.

  2. Carin- says:

    “Playa” tramp-stamp.

    (I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth)

  3. Education Guy says:

    I think he should get “Born to speak freely”, on his ass.

  4. Jeff G. says:

    I think he should get a tattoo of himself that covers himself, only the tattoo doesn’t support McCain-Feingold, won’t for a minute consider Huckabee for a running mate, and would cherish individualism over the kind of national greatness platform that leads him toward nannystatism and progressivism.

    But that kind of thing would be pricey, I think. Not sure if it’s even allowed under Mccain feingold, come to think of it…

  5. Whatever happened to bumper stickers and smart-alecky T-shirts, anyway?

  6. lee says:

    Finally! Obama said something I agree with!
    Never thought I would see the day…

  7. dre says:

    Maybe “Maverick” on his rectum.

  8. Jeffersonian says:

    How about “¡Fuck la Migra!” on his forehead?

  9. TaiChiWawa says:

    “Born to Raise Doubts”

  10. mojo says:

    “On the upper arm – a skull-and-dagger with the banner ‘Death Before Dishonor'”

  11. Dr. Weevil says:

    Why do you all assume he doesn’t already have one? Don’t you remember around ten years ago when an indiscreet talkative health club employee revealed that George Schultz, of all boring people, has a Princeton tiger tattooed on his left buttock? (“A very wrinkled tiger by this point”, as a friend noted. He was over 70 when the story appeared.)

  12. McGehee says:

    I have a tattoo on my chest of an invisible naked woman. My wife loves it.

  13. […] Protein Wisdom – How John McCain can make inroads with the youth vote [Karl] […]

  14. Dan Collins says:

    I think he ought to bet his tongue pierced, and a tear on his cheek.

  15. SarahW says:

    Comment by Jeff G. on 5/14 @ 1:08 pm #

    I think he should get a tattoo of himself that covers himself,

    Shoot, untoppable.

    But I’ve been hoping that McCain gets elected, and then opens his shirt, and then, like there’s a huge Rick Astley tattoo. With a zipper and then if you unzip it, out pops BURGE/GOLDSTEIN. Or maybe an “Alien” pop out, that would be a sight.

  16. Boss429 says:

    PW in large letters across the upper back.

  17. Mikey NTH says:

    Around this time, the popularity of body art and modification catapulted, with 24 percent of American adults owning up to at least one tattoo, according to a 2003 Harris Poll. That jumps to 36 percent for the younger, 18-29 age group.

    The Harris poll stated a third of those tattooed got inked up because it made them feel sexier. Other said it made them feel more rebellious.

    One third of the 18-29 year olds have a tatoo because ‘it makes me feel rebellious’. Nice conformity you guys got going there. *guffaw*

  18. kelly says:

    Clearly something tasteful, just below the panty line.

    No, wait. Check that.

    I meant the American electorate should get a tat only to be revealed at the appropriate time. Y’know, once the ass-fucking we’re going to get starts in earnest.

  19. SGT Ted says:

    He spent 20 years in the Navy. I bet he already has tats.

  20. psycho... says:

    UNBALANCED LOAD

  21. Mikey NTH says:

    But to be serious for a moment, John McCain doesn’t need a tatoo to prove he’s a bad-ass. He tailhooked, and that’s all anyone needs to know.

  22. Odin says:

    Yeah, anyone willing to basically crash-land on a boat has balls, that’s for sure.

  23. Cowboy says:

    When I get discouraged about McCain, I fantasize that all of this Feingold, Shamnesty, AGW stuff is just a sham to get him elected, and the day after the inauguration he’ll start kicking asses and taking names.

    But then I wake up.

  24. I’m with Senator Obama here.

  25. Mikey NTH says:

    Oh, he has his flaws, Cowboy – big ones. But he has his virtues too; much like any man.
    But with regard to AGW, I do recall Bill Clinton never sent Kyoto to the senate, and the senate voted 97 to 0 to say they would reject it. I think that means that for all of the rhetoric the US senate isn’t going to destroy the economy and throw many, many voters out of work. Talk’s cheap, especially in congress, but votes – that’s different. Ask Sen. (present) Obama that.

  26. kelly says:

    I wish I shared your optimism (if I may call it that) re McCain and AGW, Mikey. Can you say veto proof majority in the Senate? Yes, we can.

  27. JD says:

    In order for any of us to see a tat on McCain, it will have to be on his shin or the top of his foot, so we can see it while we are bent over, getting an assbanging.

  28. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    In order for any of us to see a tat on McCain, it will have to be on his shin or the top of his foot, so we can see it while we are bent over, getting an assbanging.

    Good idea. It should be a Droste effect of an infinite regression of voters getting assbanged, I think.

  29. Mikey NTH says:

    Kelly – what has been the result of all the hyperbole? Really, what has been the result?* Even those nations that have signed on to Kyoto have cheated like heck and are weaseling out of their fines. Don’t stop fighting the idiocy, of course. But scenarios of ultimate gloom are unlikely to appear (based on track records) as are scenarios of utter bliss.

    *Other than explorers going to the arctic to show the world the devestating effects of global warming being chased out by the bloody cold! The Northwest Passage is still not regularly navigable, and oceanfront property on Baffin Island is still available with no takers.

  30. Mikey NTH says:

    One more thing on AGW, and to follow Reynolds’ idea, when the movers and shakers start buying property for year-round residences on Michigan’s Keewenaw Peninsula, then you can worry. What? Copper Harbor is not the next Hamptons? Do tell…

  31. Mikey NTH says:

    Keweenaw Peninsula.
    Sheesh! You’d think I would know that!

  32. Rusty says:

    Two things that the majority of people in this world should never wear. One is tatoos. The other is spandex. Trust me on this.

  33. Mikey NTH says:

    Tatoos ought to be on burly MCPOs who can repair a steam turbine with material from the galley. Really, it’s in the best reference works! ;)

    Seriously, before you get a tat you ought to do an appernticeship where you reline a 14″ gun.

  34. Mikey NTH says:

    I will second that on call on spandex, Rusty. I live in Michigan, I have seen the horror, the belly of the beast…snow-cows!

  35. The Lost Dog says:

    Spandex is pretty much out, but I have to admit, when I was younger, I was pretty much into edible panties. Depending on who was wearimg them, of course. I mean, what could be freakier than a woman who has s string of licorice with a knot in it holding up her panties? And actually WANTS you to eat them? Whoopi-ki-yi-yo! I get hungry just thinking about it!

    I think that’s much cooler than tatoos or spandex.

  36. ThomasD says:

    Damn, the O had to go and say something I can actually agree with.

    Seriously, before you get a tat you ought to do an appernticeship where you reline a 14″ gun.

    Or be able to complete a factual, first person account that includes the words ‘Singapore’ and ‘shore patrol.’

  37. JD says:

    I have a tat on my ankle, a vintage Harley symbol. I like it, but would love to be able to go back and un-make that decision.

  38. kelly says:

    M9th: Agreed on your point. I’m just a tad cynical (read: a lot) when two combustible memetic ingredients mix: gullible pols and hyper-hysterical eco-fascists.

    FTR, I’m tat free. But looking on the bright side, maybe I’ll get to pick my own number once the final purge gets underway.

    /dark allegory

    ‘night all

  39. Jim in KC says:

    Or be able to complete a factual, first person account that includes the words ‘Singapore’ and ’shore patrol.’

    Well, maybe Olongapo and Shore Patrol.

  40. Mikey NTH says:

    I’ll agree with your comment #36, ThomasD. Because I am a traditionalist; there ought to be a story for that tatoo other than ‘me and a few girlfriends got drunk at college and decided to get tats, and Mandy hadn’t maxed out her credit card that month’. The story ought to have a bar fight with a bunch of guys from USS Whatever in it somewhere. Tradition, dammit.

  41. The Lost Dog says:

    Comment by JD on 5/14 @ 4:48 pm #

    “In order for any of us to see a tat on McCain, it will have to be on his shin or the top of his foot, so we can see it while we are bent over, getting an assbanging.”

    I’m with you here, JD.

    I keep trying to psyche myself to vote for McCain, nut he kicks us in the balls almost every day.

    Although I see-saw about this, right now, I wouldn’t vote for him unless he decided to put a little piece of lead WAY deep in his ear, just like that farmer did to calm his nutso bull. Jimmuh has had his shot and blew it.

    We now have a choice of THREE Jimmuhs for president.

    “Cap and trade” my ass, Jimmuh, Jimmuh, and Jimmuh..

  42. […] was kidding yesterday, but apparently Luis Salgado did not appreciate the deadpan tone: Salgado, 28, owner of the Ill […]

  43. I can’t believe nobody has thought about the fact that Obama just put down the bitter, gun loving, bible toting, tatoo wearing americans again.

    Seriously, do you know how many of those bitter americans Obama loves to hate have tatoo’s.

  44. Jeff says:

    A tattoo is just a mullet you can never cut.

    And man, people who draw on themselves sure are _sensitive._ You never hear people who wear stupid clothes get so worked up when people make fun of them.

    I guess that’s because they didn’t have the clothes permanently glued to their bodies…

  45. Radish says:

    *blink* Looks like O! just insulted the entire NBA.

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