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Teacher Mentors Students (CraigC)

If Goldstein ever decides to come back, he has a new prison-diary series waiting for him.  If he does, um, take this one on, he’ll have to come up with a new style, though.  The subtle, nuanced, innuendo-laden references to glass-cutting nipples will have to give way to a more direct approach, since our naughty teacher has somewhat of a more hands-on philosophy.  Follow, if you will, the progression of the story at the link.  First, we get:

Ms. Swogger says she rented a hotel room to socialize and drink beer with adult acquaintances, but teenage friends of her son showed up and refused to leave. She maintained yesterday that she knew nothing about drugs in the room and did not give the teens any beer.”I think if they drank, I would have known about it,” she said, adding that she unsuccessfully urged the two girls to leave.

Ms. Swogger also said she did not have sex with any of the young people present. They may have had sex with one another, she said, but did so “discreetly.”

Which eventually becomes:

In the new charges, police allege Swogger “asked or encouraged” two 15-year-old runaway girls to have sex with her.Swogger also is accused of asking the girls, one from Tarentum, the other from Brackenridge, to have sex with Swogger, a 17-year-old boy and another youth. The incident occurred at an overnight drug, beer and sex party held late last month in the Clarion Hotel, authorities said.

One of the 15-year-old girls told police Swogger tried to touch her breasts, told the girl she was bisexual, and suggested a “threesome” with the other 15-year-old girl. But the first girl told police she said no, even as Swogger undressed and told the girls how much she enjoyed having sex with the 17-year-old boy.

I don’t know why this woman was only a teacher’s aide.  Looks to me like she’s got the mad skillz to be a full-fledged professor.  Come on, Jeff, it has all the elements.  I mean, Abbiejane Swogger??  Which, in case you hadn’t noticed, rhymes with “blogger.”

14 Replies to “Teacher Mentors Students (CraigC)”

  1. Topsecretk9 says:

    I’m thinking it was pretty terrible of those young teenage boys to tempt punishing this sexual expressive woman with pregnancy. Yo! Also, it’s evident they raped her because they white and went there!.

  2. MC says:

    SEX BAITER!

  3. daleyrocks says:

    Who wouldn’t want to go whole hogger with Abbiejane Swogger?

  4. thor says:

    A Swogger dogging double kegger, woo ha!

  5. Enoch_Root says:

    Those teachers! if only the Medieval church would allow them to be married! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH, teh hypocrisy! for teh children ‘an all

  6. McGehee says:

    SEX BAITER!

    A skill almost universally mastered, yet still marketable.

  7. Salt Lick says:

    SEX BAITER!

    A skill almost universally mastered…

    Are you calling Craig a master baiter? I question the timing.

  8. McGehee says:

    Well, he may still be an apprentice. Time will tell.

  9. Tom Brown says:

    The Martha chronicles still stand as the absolute best of the internet. Armadillo tongue!

  10. TmjUtah says:

    So… which one of the boys intends to move to New York for a political career?

  11. MC says:

    SEX BAITER!

    McGehee:
    A skill almost universally mastered…

    Salt Lick:
    Are you calling Craig a master baiter? I question the timing.

    McGehee:
    Well, he may still be an apprentice. Time will tell.

    Thing is Craig’s baiting Jeff with this. Not like it’s teh gay or anything…Wha?

  12. Merovign says:

    Kids today have it so easy, and yet they complain. Why, when I was a kid, all you could do was fantasize about the hot teacher, these days it seems kids have to basically dodge the teachers throwing themselves at the spoiled brats.

    Why do I feel like the only kid in the neighborhood who didn’t get a new BMW when they turned 16?

  13. CraigC says:

    I got a used ’62 Rambler American.

  14. Vinylstrip says:

    Pitches in when you have paint where you don’t want it such as painted graffiti or decks and docks and for heavy vehicles a soy diesel fuel additive.

Comments are closed.