Search






Jeff's Amazon.com Wish List

Archive Calendar

November 2024
M T W T F S S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
252627282930  

Archives

Blacklisted [Dan Collins]

The more recently discovered servitor of ex-Gov Eliot Spitzer’s not-so-little black book contains numerous references to blacklisted clients:

The Murray Hill madam’s little black book didn’t contain just names and telephone numbers – it also logged its johns’ likes and dislikes and their bad behavior.

  • “This guy’s blacklisted! Violent & scary. Don’t ever send a girl to him.” – Christopher goes from the black book to the blacklist after a bad date in May 2007.
  • “Guy was a pain in the a–. Half an hour in, he flaked.” – A $600 date for Doug gets cut short.
  • “Client is very sweet, polite and discreet and needs sweet and accommodating companion.”
  • “Client walked out, said that the girl is not blonde. described the girl to the client as (Hawaiian) dream girl.” – For $220, Jayson wanted a little bit more.
  • “Marriott Hotel Room 1006. Discretion very important with this man.” – Mark paid $3,000 in hopes that his name would never be made public.
  • “Came in and gave the ol’ ATM excuse. Flake.” – Robert booked a $500 date, then didn’t pony up the $500.
  • “Client wants young, thin baby face; rejected her because she was not thin enough.” – For a $1,200 date, John was not happy with the product.
  • “Really into all-American schoolgirl type.” – At $1,200 an hour, Richard knew what he wanted.
  • “Walked out, wants big boobs*.” – Jim’s $160 date went bust.
  • Some guys wanted a particular girl – but didn’t always get what they wanted. Mark got “May as Sara.” Lawrence got “Sasha as Lauren.” Walt got “Zara as Kara,” but lucky Neil got “Gabbie as Gabbie.”
  • “Mark left since he didn’t like place. Mention this to him if he books again. Beggars can’t be choosers, [expletive] …” – Another john goes from the black book to the blacklist.
  • Despite the persistent rumors, I have it on good authority that none of these clients is Ace.

*Harlot slang for tits.

29 Replies to “Blacklisted [Dan Collins]”

  1. Hoodlumman says:

    My money is on Ace being the 3rd bullet point.

  2. Mikey NTH says:

    It didn’t mention anything about client being ‘furry as an Ewok’ so it likely ain’t Ace.

  3. SarahW says:

    From the link:

    “If you go to a bar, you have to talk for hours and you have to go on a date, and talk for hours”

    But talking for hours is fun. What’s wrong with men.

  4. Bill Clinton says:

    I had just moved a considerable sum into another account and the ATM card had not come in the mail yet. I’d forgotten all about it. This whole thing is the biggest fairy tale I’ve ever heard of.

  5. SarahW says:

    Ace never paid for it in his life. And he’s a good-looking guy.

  6. JD TWP says:

    What kind of customer service is this? For $1000+, one might think that you could get the person you ask for.

  7. ZaraW says:

    All Sasha’s are grey in the dark.

  8. TaiChiWawa says:

    “Client said the Annette Funicello mask was not realistic enough, the sparklers would not stay lit, the mayonnaisse was almost rancid, and the sheep kept wandering off.”

  9. alppuccino says:

    *Harlot slang for tits.

    Does this mean that the word “Boobs” is slang or that the word “Boobs” was used in place of slang such as “golden bozos” or “nip-holders”?

  10. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    It didn’t mention anything about client being ‘furry as an Ewok’ so it likely ain’t Ace.

    I agree. The lack of a “Walked out, wanted a hobo” comment is also telling.

  11. McGehee says:

    Alp, I think they’re all a euphemism for “foibles.”

  12. alppuccino says:

    As I age, my foibles become more apparent.

  13. McGehee says:

    Adding some upper-body work to your gym routine should help with that.

  14. TmjUtah says:

    al,

    Lower, too?

  15. alppuccino says:

    al,

    Lower, too?

    Sadly yes. I’m thinking of buying a Wonder Belt.

  16. TmjUtah says:

    Duct tape.

    Gotta wax first, I’m thinking.

  17. SarahW:
    But talking for hours is fun. What’s wrong with men.

    It isn’t the talking for hours that wears us out. It’s the pretending to listen for hours that’s so exhausting for us.

  18. alppuccino says:

    I gotta do something. Cuz you know I ain’t givin’ up the wife-beater.

  19. fmfnavydoc says:

    I like the following terms:

    Hooters
    Jugs
    Funbags
    Yaboz
    Sweater Puppies

  20. Dan Collins says:

    Yeah, well you know all that lingo, because you’re a doctor.

  21. JD TWP says:

    Lovebags

  22. JD TWP says:

    For RWS

    TITS !

  23. Rob Crawford says:

    I like the following terms:

    Chesticles

  24. Rob Crawford says:

    Not mine — I first heard it from Gary Burbank.

    (If you don’t know who he is, you’ve missed out.)

  25. McGehee says:

    But you’re the one who plagiarized said it in this thread. Ergo…

  26. Rob Crawford says:

    Then I’ll take the thread.

    Thank you — I owe it all to my parents!

  27. Mikey NTH says:

    You really dislike your parents then?

  28. McGehee says:

    If they’re willing to take a thread in lieu of all the money you owe them…

Comments are closed.