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Bamalot! [Dan Collins]

BARRY:
It’s true! It’s true! The crown has made it clear.
The climate must be perfect all the year.

A law was made a distant moon ago here:
July and August cannot be too hot.
And there’s a legal limit to the snow here
In Bamalot.
The winter is forbidden till December
And exits March the second on the dot.
By order, summer lingers through September
In Bamalot.
Bamalot! Bamalot!
I know it sounds a bit bizarre,
But in Bamalot, Bamalot
That’s how conditions are.
The rain may never fall till after sundown.
By eight, the morning fog must disappear.
In short, there’s simply not
A more congenial spot
For happily-ever-aftering than here
In Bamalot.

Bamalot! Bamalot!
I know it gives a person pause,
But in Bamalot, Bamalot
Those are the legal laws.
The snow may never slush upon the hillside.
By nine p.m. the moonlight must appear.
In short, there’s simply not
A more congenial spot
For happily-ever-aftering than here
In Bamalot.

25 Replies to “Bamalot! [Dan Collins]”

  1. MC says:

    Yeah, that’s so Cream of Wheat.

  2. jon says:

    You’re the knights of the odd website.
    You claim a lot of foresight.
    You do routines,
    And act like queens,
    And emulate Rodgers and Hammerstien.
    Pontificate,
    un-obfuscate,
    and get bizarre comment spam a lot!
    (doot doot doot doot doot doot doot,
    doot doot doot doot doot)

    It’s a silly place.

  3. MC says:

    Or, Bamalot Blows.

  4. maggie katzen says:

    no, no. It’s only a model.

  5. mgroves says:

    Help, help, I’m being repressed! Don’t taze me, bro!

  6. BJTexs says:

    You’re trolls of protein wisdom
    Your faces full of jism
    Your comments wail
    and ignorance flails
    around your heads like beach pails
    Regurgitate
    the huff po plate
    and cause your cheeks to cram a lot!
    (doot doot doot doot doot doot doot,
    doot doot doot doot doot)

    They are silly people.

  7. J. Peden says:

    “Captain, I canna’ hold her much longer! I think she’s gonna’ blow.”

    “Well, that’s ok, Scotty, because… We’re Going To Ibitza!”

  8. Alcyoneus says:

    We all know what happened to the Black Knight.

  9. lee says:

    Seriously, I have become disgusted with all our local weathermen this winter. They have all taken to referring to the average temperature for the date as the “normal” temp., whenever it happens to be above the average.

    “It’s going to be 59 degrees today, that’s 12 degrees above normal for this time of year”

    Drives me crazy. “Normal” is anywhere between the record high(70) and the record low(36). I’ll bet the temp. is rarely exactly the average, but by calling the average normal(only when the temp is higher of course), they subtly advance the GW agenda.

    Besides, meteorologists can’t consistently get tomorrows temperature within 3 degrees, but they want me to believe they can predict a 1 degree rise in temp in the next 30 years…riiiiiight.

  10. Should have been Obamalot! or perhaps ‘Bamalot if you’re too picky about scanning.

  11. Patrick Chester says:

    Let’s not go to Bamalot. It is a silly place.

  12. kelly says:

    How about O’Bama?

    Barry O’Bama.

    Saint Barry O’Bama, leading lemmings to the sea. But with hope. And change you can believe in.

  13. BJTexs says:

    It may be changelicious, kelly, but it’s hopefallacious.

  14. kelly says:

    Hopefellatio? You bet!

  15. nishizonoshinji says:

    hehe, clever idea………i wish allahpundit wud photoshop obama into the picture, like in the old days.
    ill see if i can make some better lyrics.
    no offense dan, but those are kinda dull.

  16. steveaz says:

    I raise my grail to THE DAN!

    Slosh the ale ’round! Barry’s mistake smell’th my Hounds. Cheers!

  17. McGehee says:

    “I have to push the pram a lot!”

  18. mishu says:

    It’s only a model.

  19. lee says:

    Ooooo, deja vu…

  20. serr8d says:

    i wish allahpundit wud photoshop obama into the picture…

    I’ll be your huckleberry

    (Oh, charles austin, since your title was the best and I used it, you’re in it too…)

  21. JD says:

    serr8d – Serious question? What is that image in the lower right corner of the Obamalot picture. It looks like the Chief Illiniwek symbol from the U of I.

  22. […] Dan Collins (that magnificent bastardtm), a post (including a poem, no less!) in point of our favorite fascist. Concerning some environmental requirements He will impose upon […]

  23. serr8d says:

    That from charles austin’s place, because of his title.

    The least I could do!

  24. JD says:

    serr8d – Is that Chief Illiniwek in the lower right hand corner?

  25. serr8d says:

    JD – Check out charles austin’s blog. I lifted directly.

    Chief Illiniwek smiles on Obamalot. It’s just sickening.

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