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Big Chill [Dan Collins]

Stock up on fur coats and felt boots! This is my paradoxical advice to the warm world.

Earth is now at the peak of one of its passing warm spells. It started in the 17th century when there was no industrial influence on the climate to speak of and no such thing as the hothouse effect. The current warming is evidently a natural process and utterly independent of hothouse gases.

The real reasons for climate changes are uneven solar radiation, terrestrial precession (that is, axis gyration), instability of oceanic currents, regular salinity fluctuations of the Arctic Ocean surface waters, etc. There is another, principal reason—solar activity and luminosity. The greater they are the warmer is our climate.

Astrophysics knows two solar activity cycles, of 11 and 200 years. Both are caused by changes in the radius and area of the irradiating solar surface. The latest data, obtained by Habibullah Abdusamatov, head of the Pulkovo Observatory space research laboratory, say that Earth has passed the peak of its warmer period, and a fairly cold spell will set in quite soon, by 2012. Real cold will come when solar activity reaches its minimum, by 2041, and will last for 50-60 years or even longer.

Read the rest.

Hey . . . is there any “commodities” market where one can short carbon credits?

57 Replies to “Big Chill [Dan Collins]”

  1. eh, why bother? it’s all going to end in December of 2012.

  2. jgarry says:

    wouldn’t you wanna go long the credits on the assumption that we’ll burn more fuel for heating? Even should the global warming hysteria fade, the carbon credit market is likely to persist as a pollution control mechanism. Although I’m a skeptic of global warming, I do support assigning the cost of pollution to the polluters.

    maggie, was that the mayans or the aztecs — i can never remember…

  3. happyfeet says:

    Carbon dioxide is not pollution. It’s what plants call “air.”

  4. RTO Trainer says:

    Hothouse effect? I’ve been waiting for the cathouse effect to kick in.

  5. JD says:

    Meh. I am waiting for the Taco Bell effect, when an excess of methane gasses renders most of the population unconscious, and the other half is reduced to laughing and bragging about how bad theirs smelled.

    The hot is because of AGW. The cold is because of AGW. Droughts. Floods. Lots of hurricanes. No hurricanes. AGW. When did we quit just calling this shit WEATHER ?

  6. Hothouse effect? I’ve been waiting for the cathouse effect to kick in.

    too bad happyfeet already won QOTD. Who knew it was a competition? now I’m bringin’ my “A” game.

    course I may be biased.

  7. RTO Trainer says:

    Concering a comodities market–unless we’re talking about actual carbon, you know a hard currency, you’re just trying to pawn off a fiat credit. Monetizing the vapor, as it were.

  8. JD says:

    You guys really do not know how funny you all are. I can pull a comment, completely rip it from the context, and it is still hysterical. Freaky heehawing little Malachai’s will be great tomorrow. There are at least 5-10 a day that are hysterical, on a bad day.

  9. JD says:

    Farts are money, man. Money. Methane is the gold standard.

  10. RTO Trainer says:

    JD, You can’t touch methane. You gotta have something tangible BEHIND the metha….Never mind.

  11. JD says:

    Like sharts? I almost sharted myself earlier with happyfeet’s comment about heehawing Malachai’s. Sharts are tangible. Gross, but tangible. And pretty fucking hysterical.

  12. Ric Locke says:

    Errrr, you do know they did have the hothouse (Brit for “greenhouse”) effect back in the 17th Century, don’t you?

    I mean, they had to power it with bullocks going round in a circle because America hadn’t been settled yet, so there were no 500 CID planet-warmers around, but it did exist. The warmeninsts are going to pick up that blunder and run with it.

    Regards,
    Ric

  13. Pablo says:

    Sharts are tangible. Gross, but tangible.

    And there’s a market for them. Plants love them too.

    Ya ever think that maybe the plants are out to kill us? It would, after all, be a matter of returning the favor. It’s not to late to form PETP.

  14. JD says:

    Flying home from Houston to O’Hare, the really large sweaty dude that took up 2 seats that sat on the other side of the aisle from me. He sharted. While he was sleeping. I thought the Air Gleen was going to puke.

  15. RTO Trainer says:

    Cathouse Effect: Gobal levels of atmospheric Libigel reach critical levels. Married women all over the planet begin to thaw. Global productivity crashes as married men find themselves otehrwise “engaged”. Manhattan is sunk beneath a deluge of newborns in a matter of months. Starvation, overpopulation, economic ruin.

    Monasteries make money hands over fist selling Abstinence Credits. Everyone will have to try to reduce their Genital Footprint. Swedish pump makers will be ruined.

  16. JD says:

    RTO – That is not a world I want to live in. Any world that does not have a market for penis pumps for sock puppets is a world that I do not want to be a part of.

  17. RTO Trainer says:

    Oh, no. The Happy Sock market would take off as a hedge against Booty Devaluation. Sock Puppets are easily repurposed to this.

  18. happyfeet says:

    I never heard “Swedish pump” before. You can get them from Amazon turns out. This one’s on sale.

  19. Michelle says:

    I’ve given you all so much, especially JD and happyfeet, that I ask that you return one in favor.

    I have rescued four little puppies and they need good homes. I ask here, because, you all know, you are the salt of the earth. If any of you can help, you will. There are pictures on my humble blog and I will take more. They are growing and changing each day, as you might imagine. While they have names now, those can be changed. Only one is answering.

    Help save the planet by taking on a pup and burrying its poop!

    They are non-political pups — lab/terrier mixes.

    Thanks for the space Jeff/happyfeet/Dan/Thor/whoever.

  20. JD says:

    RTO – Is the happy sock anything like the Magic Sock of Love ?

  21. JD says:

    Sure, chipslady. Send one up here to Indy. I cannot keep it, my better half is allergic, but I will be happy to find a home for it.

    Now, run along …

  22. One-Eyed Trouser Snake says:

    When I am ready to spit my love spunk, the last thing I want to have to worry about is being smothered by the faggot sock puppets from the Greenwaldian minions.

  23. Michelle says:

    and which one will you take, One-Eyed?

  24. happyfeet says:

    Sorry Michelle – no pets where I live unless I go blind and pay a $5000 deposit according to my lease and I’m already harboring little critters that are forbidden, but it’s good what you’re doing.

  25. One-Eyed Trouser Snake says:

    A cute one, chips. I was down in Houston last week, I would have picked it up. As is, for me to take it, you would have to ship it to me in Indy.

  26. happyfeet says:

    I think I can go deaf too, but it has to be a certified whatever dog.

  27. happyfeet says:

    I know, JD. That never fails.

  28. Michelle says:

    One-Eyed: I can do that. Which one do you want?

    happyfeet: lame per ususal.

    Don’t think that they are political or somehting. They got dumped by idiots. I took them in. If not you, happyfeet, then do you know a friend? Money is no object. Just a good home. A good forever home.

    Thanks all.

  29. Michelle says:

    JD, I can do that. Which one do you want?

  30. Michelle says:

    JD, your daughter would surely like Olga. She’s the tan one. She’s very good, responds to her name and is self assured. Olga is a good pup. I’m sure your daughter would love her.

  31. happyfeet says:

    Sorry. Seriously though I’ve already done the dog placement thing with all my friends from back when I lived where I could have a yard. At one point I had 6 which was a lot but two were temporary for a friend and two were mine, so I had to find homes just for Duncan and Daphne. I’m a big dog person when I can be.

  32. JD says:

    Michele – As I said, I would love one, but I would have to give it away. My better half is uncomfortably allergic.

  33. JD says:

    They are really cute dogs. Very cute. If I were getting one, the black and white one, with the ebony and ivory, live together in perfect harmony, side by side on my piano, keyboard vibe would be the one I would pick.

  34. Michelle says:

    At least I tried. Often when I comment on this blog, I get some drift hits. I didn’t expect any of you to step up, but perhaps some of the people who click on my name when I comment here will step up and say that they want one of these cute pups.

    That said, thanks for considering them JD and happyfeet. Perhaps you could ask others you know about a good home for them and then let me know. You all know my blog and where I work. It’s easy enough for you all to find both them and me.

    Thanks again for your consideration, and for not deleting my humble plea for homes for some pups that have done nothing to you all.

    Thanks.

  35. JD says:

    I will ask around my neighborhood tomorrow, Michele. My best friend, and his wife, are vets, and they may have some ideas as well.

  36. Michelle says:

    Thanks, JD. They are good pups and I am making sure they will be good pups for whoever takes them on.

    Thanks.

  37. fletch says:

    I didn’t expect any of you to step up, but perhaps some of the people who click on my name when I comment here will step up and say that they want one of these cute pups.

    Typical “leftoid”.

    “I want to feel good about myself, but all you Rethuglicans are evil if you won’t pay for it…”

  38. Michelle says:

    so fletch, you have never clicked on my name.

    Also, you hate puppies.

  39. fletch says:

    Also, you hate puppies.

    Not at all! From my “travel experiences”, I discovered the “loin” was quite tasty…

  40. thor says:

    Thanks for the space Jeff/happyfeet/Dan/Thor/whoever.

    Hey look, someone thanked me for something and I don’t know why.

    You’re welcome, Michelle. Post some puppy pics on your blog. I love puppy pics.

    If I lived in a building that allowed real pets I’d take one. I need a new friend. My pet stuffed monkey is often distant and moody. I’m beginning to wonder about him.

  41. alppuccino says:

    Keep those puppies together Michelle. Don’t break up that family! They’re all each other has. You keep them and raise them. Spay them, neuter them, feed them, bathe them. Teach them. Love them.

  42. N. O'Brain says:

    Sorry Michelle, I got two already.

    Plus, the purebred Corgi just tore up his knee, and it’ll be expensive as hell to get it fixed.

    Torn ACLs happen all the time in Philly, for some peverse reason.

  43. Techie says:

    Probably too late on this thread to reach much, but the MIT Program on Atmospheres, Oceans and Climate (PAOC) did have a mock Climate Commodities Market running about 2 years ago. You could purchase either “hot” or “cold” futures in times of 1-year, 5-year, 10-year or 50-year predictions. Don’t know if they ever put it on the web.

    For the record, I bought $5 dollars worth of “cold” 1-year, and won some payout. The long-term money went into the Dept. beer fund.

  44. McGehee says:

    My wife loves animals, but when I saw the reference above to the “cathouse effect” I thought “litterbox.” We’ve got four pets already and the local humane societies hereabouts have no shortage of critters they’re constantly trying to place, so even if we knew someone who might want to adopt…

    Best of luck though, Michelle.

  45. happyfeet says:

    It worries me when Atmospheres is plural I don’t know why.

  46. Andrew says:

    Here’s a question: How does selling short work? I’ve heard the term and had it explained to me many moons ago, but I don’t think it took. It involves borrowing money buy the stock and then…um…

  47. alppuccino says:

    Hug them. Kiss them.

  48. TmjUtah says:

    I always specify gravity systems for Swedes. The pump technology, while robust and proven, still leaves open the possibility of a basement full of flaccid Swedes if the power fails.

    No puppies here. My cats voted.

  49. Michelle says:

    Keep those puppies together Michelle. Don’t break up that family! They’re all each other has. You keep them and raise them. Spay them, neuter them, feed them, bathe them. Teach them. Love them.

    alpu, you know less about puppies than I do.

    All the sissy lurkers that visited my blog couldn’t cough up one comment.

    I can’t believe that there isn’t one single person who reads this blog that doesn’t know one person who could take a very sweet pup.

    Most (3/4) have already learned to use a pee pad — and they haven’t even been with me a week yet.

    C’mon. I know someone here wants a loyal, trained and extraordinary pup. Think of the stories you’ll be able to tell! (I’ll let you rent my story about them for free!)

    JD, Jeff, Dave, you know that I am avoiding making comments about Jeff’s past comments about how Jeff treats dogs.

  50. happyfeet says:

    Have you emailed David Huckabee?

  51. Michelle says:

    Dora and Tammy have already come out against Huck. I, on the other hand want him to win the nom.

    go figure.

    you up for a pup yet happy?

    I once had a friend named Happy. He was a reasonably good musician, and a good friend. Too much into pot though.

  52. happyfeet says:

    No. I still live in my junior one-bedroom luxury apartment. And also I don’t do drugs cause it funds the terrorisms.

  53. Michelle says:

    Obviously, you are not related to the happy I know.

    Good to know.

  54. Rusty says:

    #49
    When you ‘short’ the market you are betting that it will not perform as expected. It is typically used as a hedge when one has gone long, say on a futures contract. It does not typically involve borrowing money to play. Like any game of chance, if you have to borrow to play, you shouldn’t be playing.

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