12 Replies to “News of What’s Not Happening at the Vatican [Dan Collins]”

1. happyfeet says:

   December 29, 2007 at 3:04 pm

   What you can never tell really from the movies is what happens if you just kind of let demonic possession run its course.

2. Patrick Carroll says:

   December 29, 2007 at 3:33 pm

   “Pope Benedict XVI has no intention of ordering local bishops to bring in garrisons of exorcists to fight demonic possession” – which leaves open the possibility that he’s going to go directly to local parish priests, and that exorcists will congregate in platoon-sized groups or smaller.

   Then there’s “Mark the Archangel”. Brother to “Mike”, uncle to “Gabe”, and drinkin’ buddy to “Rafe”, I’m sure.

   You can’t make this stuff up.

3. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

   December 29, 2007 at 3:40 pm

   What, you haven’t heard of Marky-Mark, Donnie, Jordan, Jonathan, Joey, and Danny. The New Cherubim on the Block?

4. happyfeet says:

   December 29, 2007 at 3:44 pm

   I think they’re just going by NCOTB now.

5. Patrick Carroll says:

   December 29, 2007 at 3:50 pm

   VATICAN CITY, Dec. 29 (UPI) — The Vatican is denying reports it plans to install more poo-flinging space monkeys around the world so vain people can get over themselves quickly.

   “Pope Benedict XVI has no intention of ordering local bishops to bring in garrisons of poo-flinging space monkeys to fight vanity,” Vatican spokesman Pazzomerda Bombardi told reporters in Rome Friday.

   On Thursday, the Roman Catholic Web site Rock On said the pope planned to install more poo-flinging space monkeys in every diocese next year and reintroduce a prayer during mass to St. Michael the Archangel, believed to be the prime protector against faces-borne diseases, The Telegraph in Britain reported Saturday.

   Father Pipistrella-Scoreggia Mangiare, a priest at Vatican University who teaches how to recognize and expel mortal sins, said poo-flinging space monkeys increasingly are in demand because vanity has become so common, reported ANSA, the Italian news agency. “Priests are being bombarded,” Mangiare told ANSA.

   Hey, the UPI started it!

6. Dan Collins says:

   December 29, 2007 at 3:52 pm

   Jeff must be very, very vain.

7. Karl says:

   December 29, 2007 at 4:05 pm

   Why isn’t that funny? Presumably because even the Telegraph is so alienated from religion that the mistake occured.

8. Karl says:

   December 29, 2007 at 4:07 pm

   BTW, UPI has gone back and fixed it now. Without noting a correction, natch.

9. Podblack says:

   December 29, 2007 at 9:15 pm

   Well spotted! I was wondering how many people would think it was true! :)
   http://podblack.wordpress.com/2007/12/30/potter-pope-and-all-that-exo-fiction/

10. Kevin says:

    December 30, 2007 at 12:20 am

    I don’t get your pic. ‘Saint Michael’? He’s an angel, not a saint. There’s a huge difference, no matter what your faith/faithlessness is. Saints are filled with forgiveness. Angels are kinda big into retribution.

11. adamthemad says:

    December 30, 2007 at 1:41 pm

    Kevin,

    Um, yes, he is both.
    St. Michael the Archangel
    http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/10275b.htm

12. happyfeet says:

    December 30, 2007 at 1:43 pm

    He’s kind of like Al Gore I think.

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