Let the black Islamophic  humor begin:
A female suicide bomber on a mission to kill a Sri Lankan Cabinet minister is seen patiently answering questions in a bustling government office before calmly standing up and detonating the bomb hidden in her bra.
Correction: Sri Lanka
It lifts and separates.
Well, supper’s delectation is delayed….
She had some perky boomers.
I hear the RoPers are working on a vaginal (mound to ground)missile.
ref: “islamophobic humor”
Close but no cigar. The bra bomber was far and away most likely an LTTE (Tamil Tigers) operative, of which the agenda is not religion-driven but revanchist-nationalist-separatist. (Most LTTE are Hindu, some are Christian, none to my knowledge, are Muslims). Also, to my knowledge, there has never been a jihadi bombing, as such, in Sri Lanka. Also, there were plenty of Muslims in that office… not that that would have necessarily been an issue for a jihadi. (Muslims are about a 10% minority in predominantly Sinhale Buddhist Sri Lanka.)
The LTTE, incidentally, established the personal suicide bombing as the M.O. of choice in modern political grievence settling.
jeyi, I know about the Tamil. It’s actually in anticipation of what certain parties are likely to say about the post.
In point of fact, though, the Japanese were rather ahead of the curve in the suicide bombing mode.
The end of the clip showeda still of the bomb. She had one of those Hindu marks on her forehead.
Yeah but the Kamikazes attacked battleships, more like a fair fight.
The suicidal recklessness of a large number of early Christians, aimed precisely at bringing about their martyrdom, bewildered and horrified contemporary commentators. But martyrdom was an astonishingly effective propaganda tool designed to inspire awe – and converts. The Greek origin of the word martyr is “witness”. Interestingly, it prompted exactly the same sorts of criticism among pagan Romans as today’s Islamist militants do in the west: the Christian martyrs were accused of dementia and irrationality.
Here is the wire service copy:
Sri Lanka minister survives assassination attempt” Nov 28:
COLOMBO, Nov. 28 (AP) – (Kyodo)â€â€A Sri Lankan government minister on Wednesday escaped an assassination attempt by a female suicide bomber dispatched by the rebel Liberation Tigers of Tamil Eelam, the Defense Ministry said.
Social Services and Social Welfare Minister Douglas Devananda, previously targeted by the LTTE on at least eight occasions, was inside his office where the woman blew herself up. He escaped unscathed but one person was killed and two others seriously injured, the ministry said.
Devananda was meeting with people in the office in a southern neighborhood of Colombo when the woman who was speaking to a coordinating secretary to the minister blew herself up. The secretary was killed.
“This is clearly an attempt to assassinate Minister Douglas Devananda,” the ministry said on its website, blaming the LTTE. …
Really, V? And was it their point to take as many other people along with them as possible? How extraordinary. You really MUST tell the tale.
Dan,
The “taking as many people as possible” story is told in Thessalonians 2.
“And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels, In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ: Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power…”
Pretty thin gruel, VM.
They weren’t known for detonating themselves and taking out a crowded forum, or taking everyone in an amphitheater hostage, or dancing in the streets after their co-religionists knocked down the occupied Coliseum.
Not resisting an unjust death sentence is a far, far different thing than dying in the course of murdering women and children. That you skip that suggests that you’re either ignorant, amoral, or simply ignoring the facts in the pursuit of “scoring” against people you dislike for their (presumed) political beliefs.
Funny, that passage says nothing about the believers killing people…
V, I just want you to tell me the names of Early Christians who were canonized for having killed as many unbelievers as possible. You may begin.
Funny, that passage says nothing about the believers killing people…
Oh, if it’s killing you want I suggest Joshua, Chapter 10…
Here’s a sample:
“On that day Joshua took Makkedah, and struck it and its king with the edge of the sword. He utterly destroyed them, all the people who were in it. He let none remain. He also did to the king of Makkedah as he had done to the king of Jericho. ”
And so forth…
And V., with blinding speed, CHANGES THE SUBJECT. I especially like the part in Jeremiah where it says, “and slay the unbelievers wherever you find them.” Oops. heh heh. Wrong book.
But I did indeed name an Early Christian canonized for preaching the killing of unbelievers. Namely, Jesus Christ.
You doubt the Second Epistle of Paul to the Thessalonians? Read Chapter 1, Verse 7-9…. heartily endorsed and approved by the likes of Mitt Romney.
He’s got you there, fellas.
I distinctly remember in Sunday School classes at good ol’ St. Mark’s Lutheran about Jesus saying “Kill ye the unrepentent, the tired, the sick, the huddled masses. And don’t forget the Presbyterians, too”.
Amen.
Swede,
In any Sunday School, it is taught that the Word of Christ is spoken through Paul.
I’m sorry, but when I read that, I find Paul contrasting his reception with that he had at Phillippi.
Oh yeah, I remember, “Teacher, what is the greatest commandment?” “Love the Lord with all you heart soul, strength and mind, and your neighbor as yourself. Oh yeah, and kill the unbelievers.”
Dan, You are reading Thessalonians 1. Turn a page forward to Thessalonians 2.
And the Lord said, “If you feel that you are superior to this woman, throw a stone against her head.” And the multitude did throw stones against her head until she did expire with a great splattering. And the Lord did laugh at this outrageous jest, and said, “You who among them cause the greatest number of unbelievers to die a hideous death or to suffer the loss of limb, blessed art thou. And thou shalt have for thine inheritance the pussy of 2x2x2x3x3 virgins, for that is a goodly number of cunts. Amen.”
I thought you said Thessalonians 1! Ah, well, I will hie me there.
Fucking A! All this is is a restatement of the doctrine, “Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord.”
1] Paul, and Silvanus, and Timotheus, unto the church of the Thessalonians in God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ:
[2] Grace unto you, and peace, from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
[3] We are bound to thank God always for you, brethren, as it is meet, because that your faith groweth exceedingly, and the charity of every one of you all toward each other aboundeth;
[4] So that we ourselves glory in you in the churches of God for your patience and faith in all your persecutions and tribulations that ye endure:
[5] Which is a manifest token of the righteous judgment of God, that ye may be counted worthy of the kingdom of God, for which ye also suffer:
[6] Seeing it is a righteous thing with God to recompense tribulation to them that trouble you;
[7] And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
[8] In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
[9] Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power;
[10] When he shall come to be glorified in his saints, and to be admired in all them that believe (because our testimony among you was believed) in that day.
What’s your point?
Death to the unbelievers, is the point.
Where? Here, or in the afterlife?
And if they don’t believe in the afterlife, what’s the fucking point?
And meanwhile, do not you, V.Mature, make as much a point of your determinations of who is preterite and who not as Paul does?
And yet, do you mean as much as the Son of Man?
[11] In summary, dear brethren, kill ’em all, let God sort ’em out. Forever and ever. Amen.
I see you forgot one, Collins.
Tis strange that even in defending the Word of Christ, you blaspheme Him.
You’re a joke.
#25 is not a joke. It is blasphemy.
“Death to the unbelievers, is the point”
“The “taking as many people as possible†story is told in Thessalonians 2”
“But I did indeed name an Early Christian canonized for preaching the killing of unbelievers. Namely, Jesus Christ”
You didn’t by chance buy your bible, at a discount, out of the back of a van, did ya?
“#25 is not a joke. It is blasphemy”
Oh, thank God. I thought he was talking about me.
Ha ha, Collins. It’s YOUR ass that’s in a crack!
Swede,
Thou sayest.
“Tis strange that even in defending the Word of Christ, you blaspheme Him”
Are you an undertaker?
Or perhaps Chris Sarandon?
No, V., it’s a joke. About you.
Methinks thou art fuck’ed in thy head.
The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen.
Somehow, I doubt V.’s sincerity
“And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, “O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.” And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths, and carp and anchovies, and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit-bats and large chu…
Brother Maynard: Skip a bit, Brother…
Cleric: And the Lord spake, saying, “First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.
Brother Maynard: Amen.”
NOW we’re getting somewhere.
Oh, Gosh, I am afeared of the judgment of the Lord for he observeth not the intention, but the literal translation, for he is concerned only with the law.
“The Greek origin of the word martyr is “witnessâ€Â.
The term martyr (Greek μάÃÂÄÅ “witness”) initially signified a witness in the forensic sense, a person called to bear witness in legal proceedings. With this meaning it was used in the secular sphere as well as in both the Old Testament and the New Testament of the Bible.[1] The process of bearing witness was not intended to lead to the death of the witness…
That was the origin of the word, but it has jackshit to do with the current definition.
What exactly is your point?
“Interestingly, it prompted exactly the same sorts of criticism among pagan Romans..”.
Pagan Romans? Are you completely fucking retarded? Look, asshat, I am in a really bad mood. Pinheads who don’t understand the difference between pagans and fucking Romans really might ought to look for some other site to troll.
B Moe, be careful.
God absolutely hates people with a sense of humor.
Except for Job.
Where’d the Archbishop of Fuckingham go?
It must be vespers.
It is true that the Bible is full of reference to death and destruction being the price of sin. However, it is a really twisted reading of it to say that it indicates that it is man through his own judgment that will mete out this punishment.
“B Moe, be careful.
God absolutely hates people with a sense of humor.”
West Virgina just lost to pitt. I have no sense of humor.
“Except for Job.”
Has Job ever coached college football? Did he ever piss away a chance at a National Championship to a suck ass bunch of PENN STATE FUCKING REJECTS!?!?!?!
A very close family friend when I was a child was a hard core Baptist preacher. Did it for free, basically, worked in the same factory as my dad to pay the bills. We used to argue alot about all this shit, he delighted in telling the old folks in the front row at his tiny little church that I professed to be a non-believer but still helped him order and install a microphone, amplifier and headphones system so the old folks in the front row could hear what he was saying.
The main thing I remember of his preaching was one time he said: “If you don’t believe the Lord has a sense of humor just look at the fellow sitting next to you”
I had another friend one time say nothing was meaner than a Christian in a Cadillac. I am still trying to write that song. Is this post close enough to a Lost Dog post that maybe he will stop feeling so self concious, you think? ;p
“She’d wear her grannies wedding dress if she could paint it black,
She’s meaner than a Christian in a Cadillac.”
Something like that.
I get a kick out of people like V. Mature, who are so anxious to prove a point that they very carefully avoid making one.
In the passage being quoted above, from Thessalonians, Paul says clearly that God will do the smiting. There is nothing in it that suggests that He needs assistants or is looking for volunteers — and, in fact, it’d be a piss-poor excuse for a God that needed help doing the smiting. If smiting is indicated, God is perfectly capable of handling it Himself without needing goons to back Him up. Or are you having trouble with the concept of “omnipotent”?
Take Romans, the 13th chapter. Rulers have been using it for a millenium and a half to justify their depredations, and it does, in fact, say that rulers oppress and that God acquiesces at minimum and possibly approves. What it does not say, there or anywhere else, is that rulers who oppress their people go to Heaven for doing God’s work.
Fact is, you go to Hell for sinning even if the sin is something God wants done. The Lord God Almighty, Maker of Heaven and Earth, From Whom All Blessings Flow, is not a tinpot tyrant or second-rate Mafioso with a coterie of sycophants privileged to flout the stated rules so long as they obey orders. In fact, there are no rules; there is no list of behaviors which, if followed, will permit you to bask in His favor.
The works are evidence. A tree is known by its fruit; if we find a plant bearing hard brown objects that, when broken open, contain solid meats interspersed with shell material, we can be confident that it is not an apple tree. Similarly, while we cannot know for sure which of our fellows is a true Christian, if we find someone who is consistently hostile and defiant of his fellows we can confidently say that person is not.
I don’t meet that standard, and expect to burn for it.
Regards,
Ric
PS 19:
7 The law of the LORD is perfect, restoring the soul; The testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple.
8 The precepts of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart; The commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes.
9 The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring forever; The judgments of the LORD are true; they are righteous altogether.
10 They are more desirable than gold, yes, than much fine gold; Sweeter also than honey and the drippings of the honeycomb.
11 Moreover, by them Your servant is warned; In keeping them there is great reward.
But I did indeed name an Early Christian canonized for preaching the killing of unbelievers. Namely, Jesus Christ.
Funny, in my copy it says:
Sure your copy isn’t defective?
I think it isn’t the copy that’s defective, but rather the reader. And to pull out old Jonah as an example of Christian behavior? Really reaching there.
Big picture, guys.
The “I’m a Christian, really, honest” followed by leftist meme A-B-C-etc. is just a meta-meme that’s been going around for years,
Looks like it’s gonna be big this campaign season.
And V. Mature even TRYING to equate Christianity to Jihadist Islamism kind of makes it clear what kind of vicious propagandist V is.
There are plenty of skeletons in EVERYBODY’S closet, but the Christian closet happens, RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW, to be empty of ritual spree-killer suicides, and Islam’s closet can’t even be forced shut.
There is a REAL problem and a FAKE problem, and V. Mature won’t let anyone talk about the REAL problem without trying to change the subject to the FAKE problem, because V is offended by the very fact that some people can be good and others bad – thus the urgency of the attempt to “level the playing field” between Pastor Bob and KSM.
You’re a rotten person, VM, rotten to the core.
The main thing I remember of his preaching was one time he said: “If you don’t believe the Lord has a sense of humor just look at the fellow sitting next to youâ€Â
Goddamn right.
Jesus was a Jew, and he was not canonized for preaching the killing of unbelievers, nor did he promote such in any way shape or form. His deification has to do with the whole being God the Son thing.
I’m still tryin’ to figger out the “pagan Romans.” Would those be the ones who didn’t believe Gaius Caligula wasn’t a god? Because they sure wouldn’t say it out loud.
for that is a goodly number of cunts
Yes, back to the jihadis. Do you think that female jihadi martyrdom is borne out of deeply repressed saffism, or does Allah provide 72 well-hung studs for femhadis. Or, for the sake of V. Mature, does the Bible say that Jesus was himself a lesbian?
Re V. Mature, it might help to remember that Satan is adept at quoting scripture..
My Mom said so, it must be true.
“But I did indeed name an Early Christian canonized for preaching the killing of unbelievers. Namely, Jesus Christâ€Â
I saw that too Pablo, and really it’s not that far fetched. I myself am an alppuccinian, just in case.
Actually, I agree with V. Mature on one point he implies. I don’t think that God really wants people to martyr themselves the way early Christians did, because I don’t think God wants people to passively accept injustice, or to give up their lives without a fight. And that’s also precisely why I think V. Mature is wrong on the larger point. God didn’t really want us to passively accept brutality and injustice then, and he doesn’t want us to accept it now.
“God didn’t really want us to passively accept brutality and injustice then, and he doesn’t want us to accept it now.”
andy? Is that really you andy? I like what I’m hearing from you. How do you non-passively show your unacceptance of brutality and injustice?
“There is a REAL problem and a FAKE problem, and V. Mature won’t let anyone talk about the REAL problem without trying to change the subject to the FAKE problem, because V is offended by the very fact that some people can be good and others bad…”
John 8:1-11
Explosive jubblies! How did I miss those?
‘He who is without sin, cast the first stone’, and ‘go and sin no more’ is equivalent to mass murder in a marketplace?
How do you type with that much cognitive incoherence?
That bomber obviously had a dynamite set of ta-tas.
V Mature has the processing capacity of an Apple II+
I thought it was more along the line of a ‘Simon Says’, Enoch.
Without the jolly flashing lights.
John 8 1-11
1Jesus went unto the mount of Olives.
2And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.
3And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,
4They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.
5Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?
6This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.
7So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.
8And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.
9And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.
10When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
11She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.
Your point is????
Oh, he doesn’t have a point. He just wishes really hard that he did.
I’m guessing V is casting himself as the adultress and we must then be those that would stone him. Which is a phrase that has a very different meaning these days. Maybe he’s asking us if we have any drugs to sell him. I don’t, in case you’re wondering.
Stoned? I must have misunderstood.
Now what am I gonna do with all these scones?