In an effort to better corral the BP oil spill story — for which Obama is being increasingly scrutinized, even by some of his most diehard media fluffers — Democrats have broken out an old standby: it’s all Bush’s fault. Reached for comment, John Bolton’s straight-talking mustache, Regis, shrugged. “Yeah, well, what’d you expect? They’re assholes.”

Barton Hinkle: Black people often make bad decisions about their health. For instance, a slightly higher percentage of black men than white men smoke, despite the fact that black men are 34 percent more likely to get lung cancer. Most black women weigh too much: According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ Office of Minority Health, “African-American women have the highest rates of being overweight or obese