Via Hot Air and the Radio Equalizer, here’s Mass Gov Deval Patrick on the message of 911: Among many other things, 9/11 was a failure of human understanding […] It was a mean and nasty and bitter attack on the United States. But it was also a failure of human beings to understand each other, to learn to love each other. Well, okay. But in fairness to those 3000 people

From Consumer Reports: Not so long ago you could count on most washers to get your clothes very clean. Not anymore. Our latest tests found huge performance differences among machines. Some left our stain-soaked swatches nearly as dirty as they were before washing. For best results, you’ll have to spend $900 or more. What happened? As of January, the U.S. Department of Energy has required washers to use 21 percent

No questions about whether the cult of the Tom Selleck mustache actually drives the perceived machismo of the Arab world, but otherwise, this Bill Ardolino interview with a Fallujan interpreter is rather revealing. A taste:

— “‘Germans’…?” — “Forget it, he’s rolling…”

On the plus side, at least we now know what it takes to land a plum job at NBC sports. Speaking of which — any openings, NBC? I’m very knowledgeable about football, have a clean, crisp appearance, and if I ever found myself alone with any of the founding fathers, I’d kick his ass for not giving Congress control over the Executive, and for allowing that whole stupid second amendment

It’s like watching a pad of pompous, congested margarine aspiring to the heights of buttery importance — only to be laughed at by a stack of waffles. But with far less pathos. And (unless I miss my guess) a thong.

Jesus, do I ever like me a good cupcake! And head. Which, as Mr Miyagi might say, “different, but same.” Come to think of it — Jesus, do I ever miss me some Mr Miyagi …! And head. And, like, pumpkins, too — though that last is driven almost entirely by a combination of nostalgia, mescaline, and a junkie’s jonesing for Pixie Sticks and bite size Twix bars.

— it’s time to give my son a fruit roll up, then change him and put him down for his nappy! **** update: Today’s left: when all else fails, break out the gay baiting!* **** update 2: Petraeus and Crocker both say that the draft they saw of the White House Petraeus report (mandated by a Democrat-led Congress, remember — a point General Petraeus himself noted) is in no way

And you thought she’d just quietly fade away. From the Hill: Anti-war activist Cindy Sheehan was arrested Monday in or near the hearing room where Gen. David Petraeus and U.S. Ambassador to Iraq Ryan Crocker are testifying on the situation in Iraq, according to the U.S. Capitol Police. Four anti-war protesters were arrested for disorderly conduct. One of them, who was not named, is being taken to George Washington Hospital

Allah is doing the hard work of excerpting the highlights of Petraeus’ testimony so that I can do the domestic work of replacing a broken crisper drawer in my refrigerator, and teaching my son how words can hold several different meanings simultaneously. Funny, eh? Or maybe not so much funny as funny… …See what I did there? And to think. Some people continue to question my genius. **** worth reading,