Hot on the heels of Perez Hilton’s making an annual homage to the feminine form all about him, we’ve got the odious Michael Musto on the odious Keith Olbermann’s odious show, trying to make it all about Michael Musto. The Miss Universe Pageant, of which Miss USA is a part, specifically debars transsexuals from participation, which is why it’s necessary for Musto, apparently, to claim that Miss Prejean is a transsexual as part of her “public shaming.”
Why gay men who like to present themselves as facsimiles of women, such as (warning: not safe for breakfast) Bettie Page, would like to attack Miss Prejean for having artificially enhanced boobs and claim that therefore she is inauthentic goes to demonstrate exactly what authenticity has become. And it only stands to reason that the redefinition of marriage is going to require that gay marriage be similarly more authentic than heterosexual marriage.
The grotesque spectacle of homosexual judges of heterosexual beauty standards claiming that they are the ones who have a right to define what is beautiful for straight men–and really the equally grotesque spectacle of Olbermann pretending to be some form of journalist–demonstrates perfectly Jeff’s thesis about what happens (control+f “Wizard of Oz”) when the power of interpretation is seized by and ceded to a strange little pseudo-intellectual cadre based on grievance. And as mcgruder says, they’re disgusting: despite what your girlfriends may tell you, catty, stupid, vicious, jealous, ugly and self-righteous is no way to go through life, son. In other words, I don’t hate you for being a cocksucker; I hate you for being a cocksucker.
I don’t care that both of you wear glasses. For harassing a beauty queen who also happens to be a woman, you brave defenders of civil society, I’d like to break your fucking smug thug mugs as prefatory to the reframing of this sad tableau of politically correct objectification. I don’t care that she’s had a boob job; she’s a human being, not a pretext, you pinheads. And yeah, Queef, we know how you treat women: for this much comic relief, thanks.
Stacy has related thoughts here, and debates the merits of natural and fake boobs here.
Via Allah Pundit on Twitter, lefty Bob Somerby shreds Olby, though in Olby and Musto’s very limited defense, I think they said “public shaming,” not “public shaving.” NTTAWWT, so long as it’s consensual. But, O! the pathos of a forty-something fratboy and his pet homosexual sidekick.
Delicious vintage smite from Mike Hendrix.
Stacy defends the high ground at Mons Veneris. Rally, m’boys!
Comment by Dave C on 5/2 @ 6:22 am #
I followed the link to Perez in drag.. I threw up in my mouth.. a lot.
I had to go back and check out this photo of the real Betty Page getting spanked for my palate cleanser…
http://effingconservatives.blogspot.com/2009/04/dear-richard-wtf.html
Comment by thor on 5/2 @ 6:53 am #
Now there’s a valid point.
If a hot chick doesn’t send a tingle through your boner then you have no ability to judge the hotness of chicks.
Comment by kasper on 5/2 @ 7:02 am #
The media is completely comfortable with having abandoned any control of personal emoting. Venom flows out of their mouths in such a stunning way these days.
Comment by SarahW on 5/2 @ 7:25 am #
The Bangs and Foamies link is the reason I didn’t get a #followfriday, I am sure of it.
/stepping up her game.
Comment by Dana on 5/2 @ 7:44 am #
I am amused by the notion that the use of physical glamorizing techniques means that your opinions are somehow of less value. So, Carrie Prejean had a boob job, huh? Keith Olberman and Micheal Musto and Perez Hilton wear makeup to appear on television, as it’s practically mandatory due to television lights.
Comment by Joe on 5/2 @ 7:48 am #
I forget who said it here, but it was correct:
Perez Hilton wants to be the beauty queen, that radically changes one’s perspective on judging.
Comment by SBP on 5/2 @ 7:52 am #
Keith Olberman and Micheal Musto and Perez Hilton wear makeup to appear on television, as it’s practically mandatory due to television lights.
Plus they just like it. Make ‘em feel “pretty”.
Comment by Robt. Byrd on 5/2 @ 8:06 am #
Saturday morning. Coffee, cigarette, birdies tweeting outside the open windows, and Dan dropping a kiloton of beatdown on some well-deserving targets.
GodDAMN, I love this country.
Comment by Spiny Norman on 5/2 @ 8:24 am #
Perez Hilton, Michael Musto & Keith Oldermann: malignant narcissism run amok. I’m surprised they haven’t drowned in their own smug.
Pingback by Cretin humor | Cold Fury on 5/2 @ 8:27 am #
[...] Dan) Category: Fucking Morons ♦ [...]
Comment by bill on 5/2 @ 8:45 am #
Money quote from Musty Buttpacker: “I didn’t even like her earrings”. Bingo! MSLGBT in Savage’s phrase shows their true color,lavender. Keith Olberfag hands the phallic mike off to Butch Maddow.
Comment by gus on 5/2 @ 9:21 am #
When did being a faggot become the norm.
Comment by gus on 5/2 @ 9:25 am #
You know one of the biggest problems of libtardism?? Libs don’t recognize nuts. Because they are nuts.
Comment by Joe on 5/2 @ 9:29 am #
Perez Hilton has a dream for Ms. America…
Comment by Joe on 5/2 @ 9:30 am #
Perez Hilton is hispanic and wants to be a woman…I see a Supreme Court nomination.
Comment by Dan Collins on 5/2 @ 9:31 am #
If he must wear a gown, Joe, I’d rather it were that kind.
Comment by J. "Trashman" Peden on 5/2 @ 9:53 am #
The media is completely comfortable with having abandoned any control of personal emoting. Venom flows out of their mouths in such a stunning way these days.
Yeah, and no doubt it must be quite an heroic task for them to try to balance off the threat of agonal limbic rage, against the constant onslaught of psychosomatic diseases and thought processes as authentic “self”, especially when the thorazine levels are too low.
Comment by Jay on 5/2 @ 9:54 am #
Don’t worry thor. You’ll still be allowed to be the token “straight” judge at the gay contests.
Comment by Jay on 5/2 @ 9:56 am #
13 I bet Musto and Perez recognize nuts.
Comment by Jay on 5/2 @ 10:00 am #
thor’s post was the first time he ever used a “boner” near a “hot chick”.
Comment by MarkJ on 5/2 @ 10:10 am #
Interestign advice from another guy who indulged in “The Love That’s Can’t Shut Up”:
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
Oscar Wilde
Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 – 1900)
I’m beginning to think the most hideous revenge we could take on Musto and Hilton would be to simply….ignore them.
Comment by serr8d on 5/2 @ 10:24 am #
With the addendum, ‘and none of ‘em have significant, manly nuts. At least not the quality nuts their grandfathers had.’
Comment by serr8d on 5/2 @ 10:31 am #
thor, if you had even a vestige of that appendage you describe, then you wouldn’t be such a prick on these here innertubes. By your own comments, we know you.
Pingback by If Carrie Prejean Were a Rich Democratic Donor, NOW Would Probably Defend Her : The Sundries Shack on 5/2 @ 10:43 am #
[...] Dan Collins cuts all the way to the quick on Boobiegate. The grotesque spectacle of homosexual judges of heterosexual beauty standards claiming that they are the ones who have a right to define what is beautiful for straight men–and really the equally grotesque spectacle of Olbermann pretending to be some form of journalist–demonstrates perfectly Jeff’s thesis about what happens (control+f “Wizard of Ozâ€) when the power of interpretation is seized by and ceded to a strange little pseudo-intellectual cadre based on grievance. [...]
Comment by LTC John on 5/2 @ 10:51 am #
Could not Mr. Hiton just have the surgery and hormone shots and become more authentic? Why just play at dress up, Perez?
Comment by Carin on 5/2 @ 11:25 am #
Perez Hilton is a cunt. So is this other boi.
Comment by Jeffersonian on 5/2 @ 11:32 am #
This is not a new phenomenon.
Comment by Lamontyoubigdummy on 5/2 @ 12:13 pm #
To quote Louis CK: “I don’t hate you because you’re a fag…I hate you because you’re acting like a FAG!”
Dan nailed it with the whole “cocksucker” coup de grace.
Comment by Sdferr on 5/2 @ 12:15 pm #
Isn’t it the case that the tear down of Miss California going on between these two is more or less precisely the sort of thing two females would do between themselves about another female whom they are jealous over for, say, her undeserved (in their eyes) beauty or ease with men? They hates her.
Comment by Lamontyoubigdummy on 5/2 @ 12:20 pm #
Sdferr is implying a cat fight…amongst possibly hot chicks.
I demand you show your math (preferably video) immediately.
Comment by Sdferr on 5/2 @ 12:25 pm #
Oh, hang on Lamont, I don’t imply the possibility of hot chicks at’ll. They could be as nearly cold as yesterday’s pizza and still have the fight for status left in ‘em.
Comment by Lamontyoubigdummy on 5/2 @ 12:54 pm #
Sorry Sdferr. I heard what amounted to “girl on girl,” jumped up, and fell right out of my tree.
You’re right though.
“Cold as yesterday’s pizza” and probably wearing flannel, Doc Martens & side burns.
And protest signs.
At best, what you described are a gaggle of “Tracy Flick.”
Nah, I don’t wanna see that.
Comment by ADK46er on 5/2 @ 1:02 pm #
I’d like to propose a new rule. Let’s call it the OLBY . What do you have to be given an Olby? It’s quite simple: if you believe that Keith Olbermann is not a lunatic then ipso facto you are a lunatic… Now having established this rule I’d like to give the very first Olby to Eric Boehlert of Media Matters (Dennis Miller radio show listeners will understand why Eric is being honored with an Olby)
Comment by SBP on 5/2 @ 1:36 pm #
I normally detest Ben Affleck, but his sendup of Olby on SNL was beautiful.
Pingback by Tennesseefree.com » Patterico slaps Perez! Perez “Dumb B*tch” Hilton claims copyright; has an embarrassing video removed from YouTube. Not for long. on 5/2 @ 3:37 pm #
[...] the gays, closet and otherwise, want to make Carrie Prejean’s perfectly reasonable respone to a stupid question an even bigger deal, well fine. I don’t think there’s a majority of Americans who will find Perez (slap a [...]
Pingback by Forget Swine Flu [Dan Collins] on 5/3 @ 5:07 am #
[...] MANBOOBS! Alex Rodriguez has enough on his plate without this: [...]
Comment by Great Mencken's Ghost! on 5/3 @ 10:23 am #
Wait a minute… the gay man tried to make it all about the gay man?! Unprecedented! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
Pingback by SKIN CARE ZONE » Blog Archive » Skin Care Products Review At CVS : On The Go Review Part 1 on 5/4 @ 12:49 am #
[...] Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: Beauty Pageant Edition [Dan Collins] [...]