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Appetizer

Q: What do you get when you cross Al Gore and a plate of fried calamari?

A: Lightly-breaded squid. That’s gone stark-raving mad.

****
update: Evidently, spittlefoamed podium banging coupled with oddly emphasized alveolar fricatives passes for “eloquent” in some circles.*

*cf. Dante, Inferno

22 Replies to “Appetizer”

  1. Sharkman says:

    I’ve just decided after reading that lunatic’s screed that rather than go to the beach this Memorial Day, I’m going to lock myself in a quiet room and Fisk Gore’s speech until the speech itself screams for mercy.  He is clearly insane if he really believes 10% of what he said.  Love the picture on Drudge, though.  Photoshop a toothbrush mustache on it and it might frighten you.

  2. Jeff B. says:

    Al is the gift who keeps on giving.  I have a socially liberal Jewish buddy who was damn near singlehandedly flipped to a strong Bush supporter (taking his lifelong Democratic parents with him as well) because of Gore’s LAST speech.  Eric still can’t help busting out with a hearty “He LIED to us!  HE BETRAYED US!” whenever the feeling strikes.

    God bless America and Al Gore.

  3. Chrees says:

    Teddy lectures on morality. Gore’s screed harps about “the rules.” What’s next? Clinton warning Bush that he better not lie under oath?

  4. Beck says:

    Followed by Dennis Kucinich lecturing Dan Quayle on family values.

  5. I actually started giggling out loud when Fox played the clip. The funny thing is, if Gore was watching he thinks, “Fox is playing this extended clip because I’m important.” In reality, they’re playing it to let him hang himself … and John Kerry.

  6. IXLNXS says:

    But the left says he did a fine job. Made some good points.

    Oh no! I am torn! Soo torn! Whatever shall I do?

    Maybe I’ll just ignore whatever crap pours from any politicians mouth and look at the results. Pretty crappy thus far. Seems both Repubs and Democrats have done a fair onto lousy job.

  7. BH says:

    Al Gore?  It’s like that name should ring a bell but it just doesn’t.  Inventor?

    Calamari though, ummmmm.

  8. Jeff G says:

    You know, I’d love an opportunity to look at the results, IXLNXS. Unfortunately, I get the story a hyper-critical, paternalistic press thinks I should get.  I don’t have any idea how things are on the ground in Iraq, quite honestly.  But I’m still convinced removing Saddam Hussein was the the right thing to do vis-a-vis the War on Terror.

    And ironically, Al Gore did once, too.  But then he lost the election, and he has since become Ramsey Clark with green garters because he’s found such a pose gives him back some measure of celebrity.  He’s the Michael Moore of ex-politicos.  And he’s behaving like a buffoon.

  9. Talkleft says:

    Sorry, Jeff.  Al Gore won the election. He just didn’t get the Presidency as a result.

  10. Jeff G says:

    Do ever just get up in the morning and write love poetry to the electoral college?  I do.

  11. -Ed. says:

    Hot look, Albert!  Glad to see you dropped the warm earth-tone look in favor of asylum chic.  It’s the real you, babe.

  12. Patton says:

    Jeff said:

    Do ever just get up in the morning and write love poetry to the electoral college? I do.

    As well you should, sir.  Albert won an election, as Talkleft mentioned while pointing out the obvious.  He just didn’t win the election that mattered, and we have the EC to thank for this result.

    I do so, at least once a month.

  13. jesurgislac says:

    Dear God, how appalling: an American politician speaks out on moral values. *shakes head* Imagine being so outraged at the atrocities in Abu Ghraib that you actually, publicly, passionately, criticize the people responsible for it! I’m sure glad Bush doesn’t have that kind of conscience. /end sarcasm

  14. Is it just me, or does Al Gore seriously look like Howard Dean in that photo? I mean really, it’s uncanny! Who knew Gore had that kind of fire in him?

  15. carl says:

    jesurgislac,

    Algore (and other clintonistas) might have more standing on this matter if Janet Reno had found herself unemployed April 20, 1993.

  16. Tongue Boy says:

    Sorry, Jeff. Al Gore won the election. He just didn’t get the Presidency as a result.

    Hmmm, me likes….

    Sorry, TalkLeft. Slick Willy helped Roger Boy traffic cocaine out of Mena. But the left-leaning media covered it up.

    Sorry, TalkLeft. Al Gore, James Carville, and Paul Begala share a vacation home in Area 51 where they plan Democratic talking points with Kos and Kodos (not THAT Kos). But Al Gore didn’t win the election anyway.

  17. mikeski says:

    Words That Just Sound Funny #666:

    “Was that a fricative that I just heard?”

    “Yes; ‘twas Al Gore who just uttered that fricative.”

  18. After seeing that picture, I would think the last thing you would want to do is cross Al Gore.  He looks ready to go nukular.

  19. SondraK says:

    AIEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHAH!

  20. mark says:

    Eloquent?  Well, to steal a line from Willy Wonka, if Al Gore is eloquent, then I’m a Vermicious Knid.

  21. Dario says:

    Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib Abu Ghraib… Bush Liiiiied, Bush Liiiied!

    Bad-ger Bad-ger Bad-ger Bad-ger Bad-ger Bad-ger Bad-ger Bad-ger… mushroom, mushroom!

    When one has passion, one has moral justification to say whatever they want.

    /end with slashdot and/or Fark-type geek-inspired code which emulates the less mature, “Well Duh!”.

    /end obvious

    /sarcasm

    /How do I end this run on code that potrays my intellectual sophistication and/or elite status?

    /–?} er, yeah.

  22. Jesurgislac says:

    Algore (and other clintonistas) might have more standing on this matter if Janet Reno had found herself unemployed April 20, 1993.

    Oh yeah: because the Waco disaster was obviously comparable to Abu Ghraib. Right. Obviously your moral values rest solidly on “Republicans Good! Democrats Bad!”

Comments are closed.