“When the cat’s away, the mice will almost certainly find their way into the liquor cabinet, then — after smoking a couple of spliffs and taking a few laps in a punchbowl filled with whiskey sour and Maraschino cherries — will begin a spectaclular, uninhibited mouse orgy the likes of which hasn’t been seen since the Black Plague, or, less obviously, as a metaphorical subtext in the Satyricon.
“The filthy vermin.”
I dunno – sounds like that little piece of wisdom may have been spoken more than once around the Hilton household, right?
That was McGehee. Mostly.
If the mice were swimming in the punchbowl and my sister’s cat was around, it would meow at us until we did something about it.
Q: Why to mice have small balls?
A: Not many of them can dance.
Major John – Don’t go messing with my girl, Paris !!!
Is this some kind of Tuesday version of the Armadillo ?!
On the NPR this morning that sonorous creepy old man read a poem about a rat. The rat was a rat that wrote poetry. There was also a cockroach involved. The cockroach wrote poetry as well. I thought the poem was actually nice, but that old man creeps me out and should not be left alone with children. The poem is here sans creepy old man.
You skinny-dip one time in a pool filled with Mountain Dew® Code Red™ with a couple of midget cheerleaders and they never let you live it down.
JD – “Is this some kind of Tuesday version of the Armadillo ?!”
Paris Hilton or the mice?
Watch that midget talk, man. I’ve warned you guys once already.
Hence the expression, “rats deserting a sinking spliff.”
McGehee – Can’t we go one stinkin’ day without a midget or a dwarf reference ?! I just had cleared the Oompa Loompa images from my head, and then you shove them right back in there. Thanks, bro.
Major John – As Paris is a kind, talented, and attractive lady, with many “talents”, I was obviously referring to the mice ;-)
“Can’t we go one stinkin’ day without a midget or a dwarf reference ?”
Altitudist.
B Moe – I think by definition, my phobia of the severely vertically challenged is irrational.
Now…were these cheerleaders who cheered midgets, or were these cheerleaders who were midgets.
Precise language people. We have a reputation to uphold on this site. The distinction is important.
You mean “Dirty, dirty vermin”, obviously.
gahrie – Be it a cheerleading squad comprised of midgets, or a cheerleading squad cheering for midgets, it remains creepy.
Depending on the length of time said rodents spent in the punch bowl, they might not be filthy. Alcohol *is* used for cleaning, after all…
Any offspring conceived on that ill-fated drunken night would, most surely, rise to become the next generation of Hollywood elite.
A stitch in time is great, but you can always buy more clothes.
There are more ways than one to skin a puppy.
If you give a man a fish, remember to charge him for it.
A penny saved is still just a penny, even with compounded interest.
Uh, Kevin? You’re robbing me of valuable material here.
I only know so many homilies, you know ;)
Nothing tastes better than a free beer.
You know,I REALLY wanted to leave a post here regarding my daughters and last time I went away for a night….But that would just be wrong…..
JUST to clarify….THE MESS in the AM was unbearable,as was the beer stench….I blame the ‘dillo
Unbearable Beer Stench would be good name for a rock ban, if there were still rock bands.
As would Mouse Orgy.
And Dirty Vermin.
I’m a little unsure about “Midget Cheerleaders,” however. That could lead to mass midget violence.
Hey, as long as we can get it on video and charge for the download…