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Today in history

  • In 1970, President Nixon signed legislation lowering the minimum voting age to 18. Since that time, 18-year olds have accounted for 113 presidential votes, 84 of them for Jimmy Carter, 14 for Al Gore, 12 for John Kerry, and 1 each for write in candidates Kurt Cobain, Lynyrd Skynyrd (discounted), and “that guy from the Subway commercials, because I think he’d add a really cool fixin’s bar to Air Force One.”
  • In 1945, the World War II battle for Okinawa ended with an Allied victory; sadly, expat Okinawan Mrs Miyagi and her unborn son died during labor at the Manzanar Relocation Camp — spawning a series of “Ralph Macchio is adopted by a wise old handyman, learns karate while engaging in slave labor, then kicks bully ass!” movies that should have stopped after Elisabeth Shue walked away, opting to do Cocktail, instead.
  • In 1997, World leaders concluded an historic summit in Denver with Russia’s full participation for the first time; luckily, a strain in international relations was avoided despite then-President Clinton’s “accidental” sliding of his pinkie and thumb into the upscale undies of Britain’s Cherrie Booth when First Lady Hiillary Clinton stepped in and was able to convince the mainstream media that Kenneth Starr and House Republicans had orchestrated the whole thing by “conspiring to serve, like, tons of raw oysters.”

10 Replies to “Today in history”

  1. Poor College kid, didn’t even vote for Kurt Cobain, ended up voting for his conservative corporate mid level manager step brother Kirk.

  2. McGehee says:

    I think I get it. Kirk is to Kurt as Hastings is to Eli. &lt/Ugly Hill reference>

  3. McGehee says:

    Note to self: never leave off the terminal semicolon when coding in those stupid pointy brackets.

  4. BJTexs says:

    On this date in 2007: Harry Reid is still a tool.

  5. Tman says:

    Elisabeth Shue?
    Mmmmmm….I bet SHE could’ve kicked Macchio’s ass.

  6. Patrick says:

    You do know that Andrew Sullivan saw Elizabeth Shue’s tits live and in person, don’t you?  

  7. Patrick says:

    Oh dear, she’s married to the chap who directed "Inconvenient Truth".  IMDB knows everything.

  8. klrfz1 says:

    How come it’s always Today in History? Why not Yesterday in History? A Week From Last Tuesday in History?
    Stuck in a rut.
    Besides, it’s Herstory, now.

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