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Hitchens Raptor [Dan Collins]

employs dagger-like incisors, cavernous jaws, to extract large hunk of flesh from Jimmah’s scrawny hide, not very surgically.

If blood sport is hardly your thing in the morning, you may wish instead to check this out:

Edwards charges $55,000 to speak to UC Davis students about poverty

I suppose you might be able to make this stuff up, but people would say you were daft.  Personally, I can’t say I’ve ever seen a presidential campaign by a guy supposed to have had a chance get things so perfectly wrong.

Here’s a sentence one doesn’t see every day, thank God:

The identical Missouri twins say they were unknowingly having sex with the same woman.

My favorite line:

“Did you sleep with him while in Sikeston for the rodeo?” In fact, I think I’ll start using this as a response to non-sequiturs.  This is a bit like Solomon reversed.

And finally, should you wish to hang around until Jeff starts posting, there’s Rachel’s Helpful Guide to Online Dating, for Men.  I see that Althouse has linked to it, as well.  And with this tool, you can cut and paste to determine just how counter-tenor I am, for example, or how butch Amanda is.  Another, less powerful, that will take a smaller sample.

Collins predicts Egyptian incest rates to rise

25 Replies to “Hitchens Raptor [Dan Collins]”

  1. furriskey says:

    “Did you sleep with him while in Sikeston for the rodeo?” In fact, I think I’ll start using this as a response to non-sequiturs.  This is a bit like Solomon reversed.

    But the link takes me back to the fool Edwards. I want to read about Rodeo Sex, not hypocritical socialists.

    I can get hypocritical socialists at home-

  2. Dan Collins says:

    Thanks, furriskey!  I think that’s fixed now.

  3. furriskey says:

    Let’s hope so. It’s bad enough being diagnosed as a weak European female by your Gender Tool.

  4. furriskey says:

    “Look, she had a bunch of girlfriends to the rodeo and they got drunk and she went banging on Raymon’s door trying to have sex,” Copeland said. “He says he did reluctantly…but I can’t imagine it was reluctantly — and that’s when the baby was conceived I guess.”

    Changed my mind. I’d rather read about hypocritical socialists.

  5. Dan Collins says:

    Well, what did you paste in there?  Some Jewel lyrics?

  6. John Edwards says:

    Ah’m just setting an example for the po-ah. If po-ah folks would just join the college lecture suckit, we’d have no more po-ah folks.

    Some folks just don’t git it.

  7. furriskey says:

    Interesting. Love Missile comes out as Female on both.

    Must be some sort of a dildo.

  8. B Moe says:

    But Martin of the Mondavi Center said that “as with any other performer, (the speaking fee) has to be negotiated…

    Do you realize how much it costs to take that many dogs and ponies on the road?

  9. serr8d says:

    Now, the lyrics of Kashmir analyze both ways…one wonders if Plant’s love missle was somewhat trackless, at times?

  10. DrSteve says:

    Re: Hitch, he delivers a well-deserved brutalizing of President Carter.  I think anyone has to recognize the self-serving nature of any criticism Carter directs at any other President past or present—he’s not trying to place anyone on the pedestal marked “worst ever” so much as he is trying to bump himself off.

    Saving grace, Mr. President, Hitch still thinks Nixon’s worse than you were—but keep it up.

  11. furriskey says:

    Carter is suffering from what used to be known as Willi Brandt Syndrome, before Ted Heath took it over and ran with it (waddled with it) for about 30 years.

    Something overtakes them once they have been booted out of office- they suddenly become convinced that their opinions are worth public expression and nothing can convince them otherwise, not even ridicule and humiliation.

    Makes you wonder whether timbo used to hold public office.

  12. furriskey says:

    Attiya – the head of Al-Azhar’s Department of Hadith, or teachings of the Prophet Muhammad – insisted the same would apply with adults. He argued that if a man nursed from a co-worker, it would establish a family bond between them and allow the two to work side-by-side without raising suspicion of an illicit sexual relation.

    Bitty.

  13. gahrie says:

    Ezzat Attiya had issued a fatwa, or religious edict, saying adult men could breast-feed from female work colleagues

    Finally something from Islam that I can support…..

  14. Great Mencken's Ghost! says:

    Just so we’re clear about this… a Presidential candidate charged for a campaign appearance?

  15. Dan Collins says:

    It was early 2006, GMG, so I’m not sure whether he’d declared already, or not.  But on the let me get this straight front, some university paid His Silkiness $55k to speak on poverty?

  16. MarkD says:

    The only rodeo I ever saw had a line about 200 people long waiting to get at the beer keg. 

    I never saw the point of rodeo.  It’s like an outdoor bar, in the hot sun, except the smell and the music are worse.  Or did I miss something?

  17. Nanook of the North says:

    What’s wrong with an outdoor bar in the hot sun?

  18. Jim in KC says:

    Ah, man, nothing says “redneck” quite like getting drunk at the rodeo and making a booty call, does it? 

    Paging Jeff Foxworthy…

  19. McGehee says:

    your Gender Tool.

    I definitely didn’t need to see those three words strung together before lunch.

  20. Paul Zrimsek says:

    We all laughed when Edwards went to work for a hedge fund to learn about poverty, but damned if it doesn’t work! I’ve got to see about getting one of those $460,000 internships myself.

  21. Jeffersonian says:

    A – I’ll be converting to Islam now, thanks…can’t see their ankles, but you can suck their tits. WTF??

    B – I’ve crossed “get on Hitchens’ bad side” off my list

  22. Dan Collins says:

    You can suck their tits, but only if they’re nursing, I think.

  23. Eric says:

    No problem.  I’m not proud.

Comments are closed.