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Yo, Jeff.  It’s Friday.  And that means&#8212

—Well, I know what it’s supposed to mean, sure.  But it ain’t gonna happen today.  Truth is, the little guy spent yesterday “infiltrating” the student protest march on our Capitol building, and I haven’t seen him since.

My guess?— the little scoomdogger parlayed his tiny black beret, “Buck Fush” Urban Outfitters tee, scrotum piercing, and Israeli-made kibbutz sandals into a wild threesome with some wannabe politically-“engaged” high school girls.  Which means he’ll come strolling in sometime this evening, wearing a shit-eating grin and stinking of patchouli, trying to get me to “smell his claws.”

Seriously.  The bastard has no scruples when it comes to getting that funny feel.

16 Replies to “Yo, Jeff.  It’s Friday.  And that means&#8212”

  1. B Moe says:

    “It’s an imperialist war based on manifest destiny,” said Julio Tapia, a student at Emily Griffith Opportunity school.”

    Manifest destiny?

  2. Rob B. says:

    I’d blame him but … I can’t.

    He’s just getting some strange and with that group it might get strange in more than one way.

  3. Boss429 says:

    I too can’t say that I’d blame the li’l fellow. They’re building them a hell of a lot better now than they did back in my day.

    TW: back in my day was 81, but today they’re still built better than even96

  4. He said the money used to fund the war should instead be used to put students through college.

    “We want to be doctors; we want to be congressmen,” he said.

    Do they also want to be grown-ups? 

    Why do lefties act as if there’s some way they can trade the cost of a social program for the cost of national security?

  5. Bill D. Cat says:

    stinking of patchouli,

    Patchouli , heh , nothing quite like the stench of rancid hippy . Wait fer the little crud with the pressure washer tho….

  6. Simple Voice says:

    scoomdogger

    that is a brand new name to me. would it happen to mean…

    1.  scoomer

    A Person of very poor personal hygiene

    Good lord you really stink you dirty scoomer

    or does it mean this>>>>

    smoodge

    to curry favor; seek unwarranted recognition.

  7. Wind Rider says:

    So, in other words, he’s dancing, just not for us.

    Great.

    If he offers up video…no, we don’t wanna know.

  8. Pablo says:

    Rainbow, I’m totally feeling your righteous anger. And those cute little tits of yours, all barely wrapped in that sundress.

    Let’s fight the power together, baby!

  9. ThePolishNizel says:

    I too can’t say that I’d blame the li’l fellow. They’re building them a hell of a lot better now than they did back in my day.

    TW: back in my day was 81, but today they’re still built better than even96

    No shit, boss…I used to be a pretty good beach volleyball player in the day, late 80’s, early 90’s.  The high school v-ball groupies were getting better endowed by the year.  And now it is even more impressive.  I’m a dirty old man, alright.  But I know to just say no. 

    tw: large25

    No I’m thinking more like large 38’s are the order of the day for the modern high school girl.

  10. Anwyn says:

    I’ve got Israeli-made sandals. Best sandals evah. Which means I doubt they have anything to do with a kibbutz.

  11. Merovign says:

    My Golly Gee Willikers – I checked three times to make sure I wasn’t at the Onion.

    “By walking out, we have taken the initiative to get noticed,” said 17-year-old Lalito Pacheco, a student at Thornton High School.

    I’m pretty sure those passing by couldn’t help notice the large pack of truants milling about.

    Some signs read, “Books not guns,” “Impeach Bush” and “They have money for war but they can’t educate the poor.”

    Actually, I think it’s more like we can’t educate the willfully ignorant. Especially when they skip school (though, frankly, with most public schools it’s a bit of a toss up).

    “It’s an imperialist war based on manifest destiny,” said Julio Tapia, a student at Emily Griffith Opportunity school.

    Wow, I’ll bet he read those big words in a book. Or, more likely, heard them rattled off by a glazed-eyed zombie-lookin’ Kayne West on MTV between bosomy rap jerk-fests.

    He said the money used to fund the war should instead be used to put students through college.

    So, basically, this kid is ALREADY an interest group lobbyist! Noses in the trough, everyone, all moral issues reduced to welfare checks!

    “We want to be doctors; we want to be congressmen,” he said.

    Eeep! Well, I guess someone has to take the place of Kevorkian and Sharpton when they die.

    “I was a little disappointed,” Pacheco said about the turnout, “because I don’t know whether they’ll take us seriously now.”

    Umm, no, but not for that reason.

    He said he had hoped that about 2,000 students would show up, but that schools were on lockdown to keep students from participation.

    Christopher Lee, a Denver Public Schools spokesman, said that wasn’t true.

    And here we have the birth of a Truther – or rather, an example of the paranoid irrationality that Truthers don’t grow out of.

    It’s funny how language inversion seems to follow certain philosophies. The “reality based” movement was almost entirely focused on denying reality, the “Truthers” are willfully ignorant of the truth, “MoveOn” is a classic partisan lobby that dwells on political grievances…

    And did anyone else, as a student, get the odd feeling that the worst people to get up in the face of the news and lecture the world on what to do are, well, kids who haven’t done or learned much of anything?

    I know that, as a lad, I resented being excluded from decisions because of my age, but I tried to restrict that resentment to situations where I actually DID know something about the subject. I was certainly imperfect, but I never went out in front of cameras and demanded that people run the world MY WAY because I didn’t know how the hell to run the world!

    The sick thing is that there are plenty of teachers who encourage crap like this in the guise of “involving kids” or self-esteem crap or whatever… but mainly because a lot of academia are no more knowledgeable, experience, or emotionally mature than the kids they teach!

    Obviously, there are a lot of immature people everywhere, but I think the academic/bureaucratic environment helps protect people from reality, and the consequences of a emotional seven-year-old in an adult’s body are a lot more severe in government or education than they are in a customer service call center or the checkout line at Wal-Mart.

  12. Bill D. Cat says:

    The bastard has no scruples when it comes to getting that funny feel.

    Gotta admit , neither do I .

  13. mojo says:

    Young and dumb? Naw – get outta here!

  14. JWebb says:

    Little known fact: Before reporting for jury duty, generously douse yourself with patchouli oil. Guaranteed to eliminate you in the first round of voir dire.

  15. Rob Crawford says:

    I know that, as a lad, I resented being excluded from decisions because of my age, but I tried to restrict that resentment to situations where I actually DID know something about the subject.

    Yeah, me too. Then I grew up, and realized that—if you have an ounce of responsibility—being involved in the decisions means you’re involved in the responsibility, too.

    For example, I’m glad as hell I wasn’t involved in any of the decisions that led to this.

  16. ahem says:

    How undercover was he? Check his boxers for hash marks.

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