 |
“You know, what the lily-white Establishment forgets, while it’s trying to pillory me with ‘questions’ about my Native American ancestry, is that I have other claims on systemic oppression. Namely, that I am part Black. And my ties to the ‘hood frightens the fascist bourgeois witch hunters even moreso than does my red man’s blood. Because as a Black, I am Revolution writ large. I am America’s history of oppression. And the Man doesn’t want me around as a reminder of his own chequered history. Which is why he’s working so hard to bring me down.” | |
 |
“Wow, I had no idea, brother. On the upside, though, now when some kid asks me ‘what’s black and white and re(a)d all over?’ I can skip ‘a newspaper’ and ‘a zebra with a diaper rash’ and go with ‘Ward Churchill’.
“Obscure, sure. But if the little pissant doesn’t like it, I can always just kick him furiously in the shins or sternum until he learns the ancient Indian lesson about messing with a guy with a beaded band around his supercool asskicking hat.”* |
You may need to fix the tinyURL link, m’friend.
[fixed – ed]
AAAAAAAAAH! I’m in the comment twilight zone! I can’t see the article I’m commenting on. Just a bunch of untitled whitespace. This so totally reminds me of THX1138. Or that episode of Star Trek: DS9 where Capt. Sisko got trapped in the sub-space bubble and only saw Jake every few years or so.
Cool.
So, is there anything to eat here?
OH! And… um, well. I gotta go to the bathroom…
nun with a spear through her head?
“And, Ward, I’m a little worried about the Beaver.”
“Beaver? I thought you said that was your hat!”
I think there’s pie around someplace, Michael.
Wash your hands.
That’s better. Thanks, ed.
For a black Indian, Ward sure looks like a punkass white boy.
Hmmm.
Well I know one question I have that hasn’t been answered by Billy Jack:
Is the theme song to the old western TV show “Rawhide” really about rounding up cattle or is it really a secret anthem to gay bondage?
I mean really now:
Can we get any more explicit than that? It’s like it just emerged from a YMCA communal shower all dripping with oil and gleaming leather harnesses!
Great. Now he’s owed reparations too.
“Ah yes, the black white man. Very strange. I met one once.”
— Chief Dan George
He can get them from Barrack H. Obama. Unless he just forks them over to himself.
And next time, put on some goddamn sunscreen.
I just realized what WC was trying to look like in that picture, y’all: Che Silverheels.
OK Ward, you’re a redskin. We believe you. But you can’t build the casino on that land until you give Harry the scratch.
I’ve been trying to refrain from commenting on “Che Silverheels”… I hate you for thinking of that first, McGehee.
P.S. Can I still use it?
Well, if you go far enough back, we ALL have (insert ethnic group here) ancestry.
Me? I’m still working on the Minoan/Bactrian/Assyrian/Visigoth angle.
Pure affirmative action GOLD.
“nun with a spear through her head?”
A nun in a madrassa?
A penguin post-global warming?
I swear I did not spawn the whelp. No child of mine would turn out like that.
You may, but you must style it thusly: Che Silverheels®