You Can’t Travel Back in Time, Scientists Say
Opening wormhole requires more energy investment than getting laid in high school.
UPDATE: Or Germany
Legless panda needs a hand to improve sex life
No comment.
Oops! Huge Distant Galaxy Actually Small and Close
“Little. Far away. Little. Far away.”
“I’m still not getting it, Ted.”
Don’t skip The View.
Female ‘Fat Talk’ Mandatory, Study Finds
Money quote: Self-degradation is predictable
It’s unlikely mammals and dinosaurs could have shared power
I thought Anna Nicole had died, too . . .
I suspect this was an inside job
UPDATED AGAIN: You think you have computer problems?
NEWLY AGAIN UPDATED: F*cking Preston Taylor Holmes has it rough.
What about forward?
THE greatest time-travel story ever is “All You Zombies‗ by Robert A. Heinlein.
How about playing the “Time Travel Game.”
The rules: you have a time machine and a high powered rifle.
Who, in all of human history, do you go back and kill?
Grak Onh (One Eye), 70,000 BC, the inventor of pain and boredom.
I’d kill the guy who invented the time machine.
Some random guy.
However, I’d kill in a completely anachronistic way, and bury his body in such a way as to guarantee he’d be unearthed at a time when they’d be able to detect the anachronistic way.
Like, say, a copper-jacketed slug in a stone-age corpse.
I’d have to take a shot at the guy who floated the Godfather III script.
Leave a Coke bottle by the corpse, too.
And an iPod.
OK, that’s a Coke bottle, an iPod, and a copy of the script to Godfather III next to the body of a cave man shot dead.
Anything else?
Bury the corpse with a ticket stating that his customer number is 897,148, some DMV forms, and a To Do list with “Go to National Health Service” scratched out, with the words ‘too slow’ scribbled next to it.
Self-degradation is predictable
Well, it probably is for Dan, but I thinking they probably meant self-deprecation.
Firstly, I’ll point out that what this study found was that 40% of men and 51% of women expected a woman to join in the how-fat-I’ve-gotten moan. That’s only expectations, not reality, and it any case it’s a bare majority of women, and a minority of men. The article hints that there are other studies; maybe it should’ve cited the ones that support the conclusion.
I’d love to know what the 60% of college boys thought that the fourth woman would say. Probably something along the lines of “So long, hogs. I’m off to flash ass by the pool. Too bad you can’t join me. Muahahaha.”
Having said that, though, my experience is that their conclusion is correct: women denigrate themselves in front of other women, and you’re expected to join in or risk appearing uppity. And ain’t nothin’ a woman despises more than an uppity woman.
In other news: Hitler was a Braunschweiger? Stinky!
OK, that’s a Coke bottle, an iPod, and a copy of the script to Godfather III next to the body of a cave man shot dead.
Anything else?
How about the keys to a Prius?
Even better!! A fake paycheck from Geico!! And the results of a screen test!
How about a receipt from Al Gorestone for carbon offsets.
Anything else?
A crushed Cretaceous butterfly.
Angie–
That reminds me of a conversation I had with my son Brendan when he was three. First really warm day of spring in Iowa City, we were walking through the park in front of sorority row, and there were scads of young women sunning themselves in swimsuits.
He asks, “Hey, Dad, why are they all lying around in their swimsuits?”
“I don’t know, honey. Why do you think?”
[Really loudly] “I think they want to SHOW THEIR BUTTS!”
Sorry Dan, but this is the money quote from the “fat talk” article:
As obesity rates in the Unites States climb, more and more females are finding their bodies further from the beauty ideal put forth in the media…
If ever a clearer encapsulation of passive-voice PC smarm has been written in the history of the intarwebs, I would like to know about it.
All right, Manolo. I meant to say “funny quote.”
The WINNAH!!!
Navin R. Johnson. Just because.
Well, I could go back and kill an ancestor, then return to the future and see if I was around, or my family. If not, then I go back further and stop myself from killing my ancestor.
I just wanted to see how that would work out.