—I’m afraid it ain’t going to happen today, sorry. The little fella came down with a nasty shell fungus that, not to put too fine a point on it, looks like what might happen were a goat to eat several square feet of gray shag carpet, then manage to vomit it up in three surprisingly precise diamond patterns.
Not being an expert on the ailments common to Dasypus novemcinctus, I am of course in no position to make an informed diagnosis—though for what it’s worth, our wee friend is being rather coy, claiming he may have picked something up from a hot tub in Vail that hadn’t been properly maintained. Which I suppose is plausible.
Still, were I a betting man, my money would be on the little Pink Fairy Armadillo (Chlamyphorus truncatus) he met at the Grizzly Rose Tuesday night who—according to his slurred account of the evening—pulled him into a bathroom stall, popped a pair of amyl nitrates, and “begged me to throw a hump into her” while Dustin Evans and the Good Time Band “warbled through an absolutely awful cover of ‘My Maria.’”
Which would certainly explain why he smelled like the ass end of a Tijuana cathouse.
I’ve heard Merck has developed a vaccine, but it’s not available yet
BECAUSE OF THE PRUDITRY!
Then again, it could be leprosy. ‘Dilloes are susceptible, ya know. If he wakes you up some night saying “By Dose! By Dose! By dose fell off!” you’ll know that you have a Leperdillo in the bed with you.
A scent, apparently, not easy to forget.
Hmm. You caught me before a revision, JR.
And nobody’s gonna want to hang with him is he smells like that. But good luck convincing him.
Paul
um, “is” be “if.”
Hey, last time I was at Keystone myself and the rest of our party caught a bug from the hot tub we paid extra to have in the condo.
Memo to others: avoid hot tubs at Keystone’s ski condos like the plague. They are fermenting a filthy pathogen that you want no part of, believe me.
Not to say a Tijuana cat house is the most sanitary thing in the world either.
Updated Memo: Avoid hot tubs at Keystone’s ski condos AND little hard shelled rodents who have an affinity for fruity Cowboy bands and cheap amyl nitrates.
Hope the little guy is feelin better Jeff.
I couldn’t stop laughing after reading this, because sadly, I know that smell…..
Jeff: Heh. So, why not just “airbrush” my post then, huh? HATER!?
That poor fuckin’ dillo has worse luck than Rulon Gardner.
Did Ann Coulter have any comment?
Give ‘im some Benedryl washed down with Scapa Scotch, he’ll be fine in the morning….
SOS pads. Can take the crust off of anything .
Ann Coulter used up some of her gay baiter credits traded earlier for carbon credits. She’s gay baiting neutral apparently.
As for the wee one, hopefuly no pseudomonas bacteria was begotten in said hot tubs. No pun intended.
My nephew contracted it from a dirty HT filter. Let’s just say he’s in dire need of mastoid/inner ear credits.
Hope the little feller is up an digging for grubs asap.
Oh, who you kidding? We all know the poor little guy is helping that itinerant mime hold up the concrete of that badly engineered patio at your old place.
And you had the gall (or is it chutzpah?) to ask for credit for “significant improvements”…
Just pray nobody ever takes a jackhammer to that slab, pal. That’s my advice.
Hell, those things remove fingerprints! They have dispensers for them in the men’s rooms on the NJ Turnpike.
Only temporarily. Mine grew back.
Why?
For the GUILTFULNESS!
tw never71. Some sort of problem in Paradise still.
My computer is on life support. Sorry, folks, but I might have to hold one of those dreaded fundraisers.
Reminds me of a joke we tell of the ski instructors here in Vail:
How many ski instructors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, ski instructors screw in hot tubs.
That icky hacking stuff is no fun. Both my kids have had it; my daughter’s been coughing crap up for a week and a half now, my son slightly less. We’ve gone through enough Sudafed for them that, if we adults come down with this stuff, we won’t be able to buy any for ourselves.
And shame on you for editing a post after it’s gone up.
Someone’s gonna make some noise about that someday.
The shame, it crushes me.
No shame jeff
Do what you have to do…….
The Pleasing text and design!
http://xanax-gl-pills.com
http://xanax-gl-pills.com/cheap-xanax.html
Good stuff, very nicely done.
http://viagra-gl-pills.com
http://viagra-gl-pills.com/generic–viagra.html
Excellent webforum!
http://viagra-gl-pills.com/order_viagra_online.html
http://viagra-gl-pills.com/viagra_pill.html
I simply mad about this forum!
He poker multiplayer online offers crack muck glimmer underlay shuffling cost loan low payday heads holdem pocket gioco streep poker ball quads pot exotic.
Hi – big thanks (great site!).