“Sure, go ahead, tear yourself off a hunk—just make sure you leave some for everybody else, okay? You ain’t the only one who likes cake.”
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Recent Comments
- In The Mailbox: 02.28.23 (Afternoon Edition) : The Other McCain on Hey, longtime pw readers…
- In The Mailbox: 12.23.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll truly IS a sad, embittered psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
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And to answer the age-old question: no, it’s never too early on your birthday for scotch, cake, and hookers.
Enjoy your day, folks—and thanks for all the well wishes!
Ah, seeing a young man learn his way around the world brings a tear to my eye. It reminds of when I was a young lad, slowly grasping the intricacies of inebriation and rented titties.
“Oh, and try not to slobber on the part you leave for the rest of us.”
It is never too early to start teaching environmentalism either.
As grandpa says, “It’s got to be noon somewhere.”
To be safe,how about malt liquor, Asian massage parlors with happy endings and PIE!!!!!
Alternatively, an excellent opportunity to instruct him in the Soviet model:
“What’s mine is mine, and what’s yours is negotiable.”
Sheeesh Jeff. You’re fiddling whilst Boston burns. Where’s your commentary on scary cartoon characters in public places?
Happy birthday. I hope you will always remember that the day you turned 14 was the day after the State of Massachusetts demonstrated once again its propensity for mass hysteria for arresting a couple of dudes for putting up light boards around the City.
Because Mass is the TRADITIONAL home of mass hysterics, and because they over-reacted in a manner that ought to be an embarrassment to all of them, and especially their government, the government in turn has now decided to arrest a couple of guys who appear to be completely innocent of any serious wrongdoing. And of course they will sue all and sundry to try and recoup the funds they wasted reacting in a panicky manner. Such utter bullshit and I am outraged. I am going to get a bumper sticker that reads, “Don’t blame me, I’m not from Massachusetts.”
I hope your birthday is otherwise a very happy one. Best to wife and kid.
Friggin’ thread jumpers. Take a pill already.
Happy Birthday, Jeff
So, is the ‘dillo stopping by?
Happy Birthday Jeff. first time posting. I know, I know, picked a weird post to pop my cherry on. less at stake in this one!
oddboy, you are an odd boy.
In honor of Jeff’s birthday, I’m forcing my kids to watch Fight Club.
Jeff,
A very happy birthday to you! May you continue fighting the good fight for many more years to come.
In honor of your birthday, I’m going home and drinking good scotch!
Think MayBee could tear herself off a hunk?
Happy birthday to you…
Happy birthday to you…
Happy birthday, Mis-tah Gold….stein……..
Happy birth… day… to… you!
<blown kiss>
TW: Have you reached66 yet? (Rhetorical question only. Of course.)
Just off the wires:
“Police arrest dozens nationwide for “cock slapping” lefty activists. According to sources familiar with the investigation, they are apparently members of a cult that celebrates the birth of their Sacred Leader in this manner.
Happy B-day, Jeff.
If it’s inebration and call girls on your special day, what’s Satch gonna get on his? Don’t let him down.
I’ve been reading this site for months. And been highly amused! I know, you have never heard of me – but I’ve been giving you all ‘atta boys’ and ‘atta girls’ as you all have been eloquently cramming lefties rhetoric back down their own throats. so, I’ve been quietly watching as a fly on the ceiling, as I’ve grown to know you all as ‘family’. I have enjoyed many laughs – but have always been worried about ‘how to work this dang thing’. figured this thread would be a great time to kick the tires.
Must be Angel Food Cake, that’s the only way to eat it! Happy Birthday!
Let us not forget that today is significant for two equally important reasons: it’s Jeff Goldstein’s birthday and Groundhog’s Eve.
Happy Birthday, Jeff! I’ll hoist one in your honor later this evening.
Hookers, Scotch and Cake? All you need now is a little random gunplay and it will be The Best Birthday Ever!
Don’t let the regulars scare you oddboy. When you first show up around here you feel like you showed up at the party late, everyone is drunk, you’re not, and you just don’t get the joke.
Happy Birthday!
OT: Will the monky return to tout Israel’s killer balloons?
As another longtime lurker I’d like to say
–Happy Birthday Jeff!
I heard that 39 is “the new 26.” So, you’ve got that going for you.
Great Ceasar’s Ghost! NOBODY EVER TOLD MEEEEEEEEE!
Jonas, thank God for you… You are the wind beneath my wings and the wings of everybody else who’s “the new 26.” (Or 27.)
“Thaannk mee, thannk meee, thank god for me, the wind beneath your wings…”
Happy birthday, cockslapping Jew swine. Have a virginal Aryan maiden, on me.
Happy Birthday, Jeff. Now you’re as old as I used to be. What? Like, 28?
Thanks for PW, too. You seem to have no idea how good this place actually is. But that’s OK. The rest of us know. This site has gotten me through many a black, black depression (you can tell when they were from my posts, I would guess), and I thank God it is (you are)here when I need a good laugh.
To your health and happiness, and we all hope that there are many more years of your unique mixture of intelligence and hilarity to come.
I would say I am your biggest fan, but I know that all the regulars here believe the same of themselves. You really are a wonder.
Tom Schulz
And always remember: if you are not in the military, then you are a chickenhawk, and if you are, then you are a mercenary.
Bullshit. Run for the hills. And bring back a paper.
And maybe some nice kung pao chicken takeout.
Don’t forget the chopsticks.
Happy B-Day, Mr. Goldstein! And look, it’s snowing in your honor. Asshole.
Jeff: Happy Birthday! What a year it has been. All the best to you and family.
I heard that the ‘dillo got stopped for having a headlight out and is trying to bribe the Golden PD to overlook the comely lass in the french maid’s outfit who’s bound and gagged in the bed of your truck.
As you so aptly say: “Developing….”
tw: action17 (must be her stage name)
Does the lass in the French maid’s outfit resemble Candice Bergen?
‘Cause I hear Denny Crane’s office has been burgled.
even in Dallas!
Happy Birthday, Jeff!
I had to shovel that snow, cynn. Which I looked at as a birthday present from God.
Jeff,
You’re the one who gives out presents here. Thanks ever so, and best wishes for many more B’days. Or bidets, if you like those, too.
T&T