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a CITIZEN JOURNALIST prepares himself for the second blizzard to hit Colorado in as many weeks

How can you hatemongering Repugnichristian xenophobes even live with yourselves, wishing undocumented aliens so much ill will?  Don’t you recognize that these people—who want nothing more than to escape crushing poverty and partake of the same freedoms that you enjoy by accident of birth—are an essential ingredient in a booming US economy?

—Or that they’ll shovel your driveway, clear your furnace intake, and build your kid a Gloria Trevi ice sculpture for that 4oz can of Ortega diced green chili peppers you’ve had sitting in your pantry for, what?—two, maybe three years now?

RACISTS!

Developing…

40 Replies to “a CITIZEN JOURNALIST prepares himself for the second blizzard to hit Colorado in as many weeks”

  1. mojo says:

    Ok, who broke the template?

    SB: decision14

    People wanna know

  2. Gabriel Malor says:

    I thought it was just the crappy internet at my folks’ house. Turns out, somebody’s been playing rough with the website.

    TW: What, you think this is some kind of game41?

  3. Dan Collins says:

    Prolly my stupid song broke the poor thing.

    Green peppers don’t last 5 hours in my house.

  4. Timmy B says:

    I liked your song.  I mean I didn’t agree with most of us, but I found it witty and creative. Nice work.  the picture was golden too.  Helped evoke the actual scratchy, tinny blues/folk albums my friends made me listen to in college, a whole “O Brother, Where Art Thou” feel. 

    In other words, nice work

  5. Timmy B says:

    by the way, Dan, I meant I didn’t agree with most of “it”, not us (pronouns and me don’t get along)

  6. Big Bang hunter says:

    – Must be the Timmothy Leary edition of PW….”Smokin‘“

  7. Jeff Goldstein says:

    Am I in the right thread?

  8. Big Bang hunter says:

    – Goldstein, what are you doing here?…..you’re supposed to be standing out in your driveway, watching the advance of the “glowering, gathering, storm clouds”, and plotting your upcoming negotiations with the local subserviant class, in an effort to protect the health and well being of your back, and further “one world” advancement….”Behold the Shovel Revolution!!!”

  9. Tai Chi Wawa says:

    Wasn’t the last thread a knock on Microsoft? And now the bolts come loose on the chassis of this website. Coincidence?

    I mean, when will Bill G:g:g:g lllllllxxxxxxxx {# !

  10. Jim in KC says:

    PW runs on a Mac, I think.

  11. McGehee says:

    Am I in the right thread?

    Somebody must’ve slipped Timmy some Christmas cheer.

    The least they could’ve done is put the sofa cushions back properly.

  12. Timmy B says:

    Not true, McGehee, politics and comedy are separate (oft times related venues).  Besides, if I hated you guys and glas as anonymous, evangelical, war-mongering asses in the pockets of the (my rheotoric is reaching its limits…let me float off to Kos to get some other stuff) corporate thugs who run the McChimpy administration, then a) I would have posted soemthing witty, like “You guys suck” and then never come back (i.e. trolling you) and b) I would open myself up to more “Cowardly Socialist who doesn’t want people to keep their money AND bel;ieves Islamic terrorists are nicer than we are.”

    Since both are unfair (and in my case, untrue… although 40 million as a bonus does seem excessive), I find them lacking.  In the end, we all want the same thing, we just disagree how to get there.

    Goldstein, why did you buy the chilies if you weren’t going to use them?  Or, were you stockpiling chilies for this eventuality?

  13. Big Bang hunter says:

    “Or, were you stockpiling chilies for this eventuality?”

    – The erstwhile home owner stockpiles nothing. God’s grand plan was the evolution of our species for the express purpose of building large, energy innefficeint edifices, that pose as living spaces, but in reality are cleverly disguised wharehouses for a never ending growing pile of useless articles of every manner, and kind, imaginable. Thus, the home owner is obligated to protect, preserve, and pay for the privalege, as the caretaker of this non-descript deluge of geegaws and refuse, most of which he or she does not even recall exists, until the timely rediscovery of each item 6 minutes after the expiration date on the warrenty, box, or label.

    – There. Cleared that up, I tells yah.

  14. Timmy B says:

    Big Game Hunter,

    That point is laser-like two days after Christmas, where my family and I imported way too much junk into a house filled with mistakenly purchased cans of red enchilada sauce (my mistake was not knowing my half-Latina hates enchiladas!  Seriously, whever heard of such nonsense?  It’s like a cracker like me hating velveeta!  Stereotypes should be true more often, because all this individuality soaks up too many synapses), acres of plastic formed into dolls and horses, and clothes that cannot be worn.  At some point, a terminal mass will occur and my house will explode…beware of the flying enchilada shrapnel!

    In the spirit of the season, I won’t mention that RTO trainer will make that part of his terrorism database.  My only hope is that he blames it on the AARP.

  15. Jeff Goldstein says:

    Close, BBH.

    But the real story is, the craving I had for chili ice cream passed just as soon as the shrooms wore off.

  16. In the spirit of the season, I won’t mention that RTO trainer will make that part of his terrorism database.

    oops.  I guess we all have our hobbies, some more productive than others. ;D I think it’s the history degree. if you get tired of terrorism you might check out his “This day in US military history” thing-a-ma-bob.

  17. Timmy B says:

    After reading that, Maggie, I’m reminded that most of this blog and its posts could be placed in a time machine and used by opponents and proponenets of th Mexican-American War.

    There were portions of the US public, Southern and Western, that were excited and gung ho, while some Northeastern states were so horrified at the way the war was provoked, they threatened to secede (ironic, huh). 

    The Northeasterns all blamed Polk for trying to soldify his Southern base, especially Texas, and create more slave states.

    In the end, the Mexican-American War was the death of the Whigs and out its fire a new, vital party was born in opposition to slavery and that’s party’s first and best spokesman railed agaisnt the war at every turn.

    History does repeat itself, except for the birth of parties and all that.  Maybe Obama will be our Lincoln?

    I threw that in to annoy you guys. You don’t have to take the bait.

    PS At least we didn’t occupy Mexico to set up democracy!

    PPS Read about Polk sometime.  He is a colossal failure as a President, in that instead alleviating tensions between North and South, he ignored the issues or made them worse.  He was no Buchanan, but, it’s hard to be THAT bad

  18. This centered text malfunction makes the post scan like some sort of undergraduate blank verse.

    “I blog, and comment, and yet there

    Is no corresponding benediction

    Of the ineffable bifurcation thereof

    Regurgitated into my thirsting consciousness.

    Bastards.”

    Maybe some colored fonts would add to the verisimilitude.

  19. Pablo says:

    Two inventions designed for no reason but to needlessly complicate men’s lives: The necktie and the lawn.

    Really, what’s the point?

  20. Jeff Goldstein says:

    Much of this blog and its posts should be put in a time machine, all right.  Only I think you’d transport it to the wrong historical period, Tim. 

    Instead, maybe take it to Western Europe circa 1931.

    Who knows. Maybe then, Obama wouldn’t be the next Neville Chamberlain.

  21. Luther McLeod says:

    To form your last from the previous, shows a fine mind, JG. And, is eerily more prescient than I care to contemplate. We shall see.

  22. lee says:

    Who knows. Maybe then, Obama wouldn’t be the next Neville Chamberlain.

    Do you think Chamberlain would have been elected if his name was Heinrich Gobels Hichler?

  23. clarice says:

    Just checked in to see if Jeff was still alive and not buried in a snowdrift. Glad he’s okay.

    Another storm is reportedly on its way (get more green chiles).

  24. Ric Locke says:

    Heh. Today I put in, or rather finished, seventy-five feet of V-wire horse fence. With a top rail. By myself. I cheated, of course. The posts were already in when I started.

    I hate V-wire. Only ninety feet to go.

    The illegal aliens in my area actually want to be paid, and not in canned chiles. Most of them have better cars than I do. Mientras que, entiendar Espanol sera una necessidad…

    Regards,

    Ric

  25. Luther McLeod says:

    Ric. They will always have better cars than you. But have you ever followed them back to their domicile? BTW, I am unfamiliar with V-wire, how does it differ from concertina? Seriously.

  26. Lost Dog says:

    God’s grand plan was the evolution of our species for the express purpose of building large, energy innefficeint edifices, that pose as living spaces, but in reality are cleverly disguised wharehouses for a never ending growing pile of useless articles of every manner, and kind, imaginable.

    Excuse me for asking, but are you related to my wife?

    Jeebus! That was spooky!

  27. Major John says:

    chili ice cream

    That concept scared me more than the first time I got stuck in a minefield…if Jeff said he had actually followed through, and eaten it, I might have fainted.

  28. McGehee says:

    Somebody must’ve slipped Timmy some Christmas cheer.

    Not true, McGehee

    I stand corrected.  wink

  29. Ric Locke says:

    Luther, I have followed illegal immigrants back to their houses. I have also visited the houses they live(d) in in Mexico. Compared to the latter, the former rock. I am one of those people who objects to the “illegal” part, not the “immigrant”. They are hardworking people totally frustrated by the lack of anything resembling opportunity at home.

    V-wire does not resemble concertina in any way—it has no barbs; horses don’t do well with barbed wire. It consists of thirteen double strands of slick wire running parallel, with cross-wires woven so:



    / /



    / /

    -</pre>

    It’s heavy and stiff, and (at least the stuff I bought) so slick the fence-stretcher’s gripper won’t hold it. I can not get it tight. No more.

    Major John, you should probably stay away from the Texas Hill Country. Jalapeño ice cream, jelly beans, and ready-made cake icing are readily available. Mines are not, and if you have any spares you should send them my way. I have this neighbor…

    Regards,

    Ric

  30. Luther McLeod says:

    Thanks for the explanation Ric. “slick wire” is razor wire? Yes, I could google, but better to gain knowledge from another’s hand’s on perspective.

    I suppose I was referencing domicile in a stereotypical way. Call me racist if you like. But at least on this side of the river, the flashiest car’s denoted the humblest hovel’s.

    Though I do not disagree with “

    They are hardworking people totally frustrated by the lack of anything resembling opportunity at home,” I just want a gate, that’s all.

    BTW, your post’s are always top notch, whether here or elsewhere. I appreciate and thank you for that.

  31. Ric Locke says:

    Sorry, Luther, didn’t realize how far back I needed to go. “Slick wire” is two strands of galvanized steel wire, usually #13 or #14 gauge, twisted together three turns to the foot. It’s like barbed wire but without the barbs, thus “slick”. In the V-wire I have, it’s #13 gauge, 4-1/4” apart. The V-weave is #19 galvanized steel. If you could secure the ends properly it would probably stop a car.

    I’m quite familiar with the fancy car/crappy house paradigm, thank you. Immigrant Hispanics, illegal or no, around here tend to live in cheap (=bad) housing for six months to a year, saving every penny, and move to decent quarters as soon as possible. They are accustomed to a legal and economic system that makes the notion of a “mortgage” as unfamiliar as the backside of the Moon, and expect to pay cash for everything, and to wait until they’ve got the cash before getting it.

    Those who intend to go back don’t so much live as camp out, four or six to a room in a small house, but it isn’t squalor; they’re clean and self-respecting people. (Which sounds faintly condescending, doesn’t it? Not intended. I get as mad as any whining Lefty at the assumption that the sort of housing they had back home reflects some innate characteristic other than lackamoola imperviens.) Like you, I want a gate (and honest gatekeepers), but I have no, repeat no, objection to the people themselves.

    Regards,

    Ric

  32. CraigC says:

    I don’t know where you guys are, but here in California the Mexicans drive around in ‘74 Toyotas with one fender hanging off.

  33. Ric Locke says:

    CraigC: I don’t know where Luther is. I’m in Texas.

    Yeah, but those are the ones you notice. They pass the Toy over to the next immigrant, get a mid-Nineties GM or Ford product, and disappear into the mass on the freeway. Part of the problem is that, being illegal, they can’t get a loan, and in California anybody paying cash for a car probably gets turned in as a drug dealer grin

    Regards,

    Ric

  34. Lost Dog says:

    Ric –

    I gotta say. As much as the “illegals” piss me off for working at 1/3 of my wage scale, they do bust thrir butts, and learn faster than any American I know. And they can’t even speak English!

    I will “do the job”, but I have a problem with working for $10.00 an hour. The “illegals” work very hard, but their results are not what a thoughtful person would want to deal with.

    How do you say “No habla Espanol” in Portugese?

    And for that matter, how do you even spell “Portuguese”?

  35. Timmy B says:

    Ric, you live in the Texas Hill Country?  I am finishing a series of books on Lyndon Johnson and the hill country features prominently (obviously).  I find it amazing that in less than hundred years, one of the most sparsely regions of the country received electricity, phone lines, cable (?), and high speed internet access.  All since the 1930’s.  We have come so far in this nation sof ast it is just freaking amazing. 

    My grandmother can remember a time in the Depression when receiving a Christmas present was a joy, yet my kids (in just three generations, mind you) will be disappointed at the relatives who show with less than three.

    An amazing accomplishment

  36. Timmy B says:

    Jeff, Obama=Chamberlain?  Chamberlain wasn’t from Illinois

  37. Alice H says:

    Have they plowed the roads in your neighborhood yet?  Ours are still snowpacked.  I shoveled snow behind my husband’s car when I cleared our driveway last week so he would have an excuse not to go to work on Friday (turns out, they closed the schools anyway) – now it’s looking like he won’t be able to go to work until spring, cuz even though the roads are snowpacked there’s still enough ice jutting out of places in the road to tear the front end off of his Eclipse.  Plus I’m gonna have to shovel the snow from behind his car.  And since the guy across the street fled back to Mexico to avoid trial after he killed his wife, and the other twenty people living there stripped out the house and left it to be repoed as a HUD home that no one will take because it doesn’t even have light fixtures or a heater, there’s no green chile labor available.

  38. Jeff Goldstein says:

    The plow made one pass without its blade down fully.  Apparently, the idea was to create a giant road that goes on and on throughout the entire development. 

    WE ARE ALL ANWR NOW!

  39. Adriane says:

    After attempting to make orange and chili ice cream, I was banned from bringing anything other than store bought goodies to the family Thanksgiving dinner.

    I have the recipe somewhere, if you’re interested.

    Something to do while waiting for the snow to clear.  Or, something to use to clear the snow, if made properly…

  40. nichevo says:

    I shoveled snow behind my husband’s car when I cleared our driveway last week

    –Posted by Alice H | permalink

    on 12/28 at 09:44 AM

    Who trained you and how much does he charge?

Comments are closed.