23 Replies to “Celebrity New Year’s Resolutions, 1:  Saddam Hussein”

1. me says:

   December 31, 2006 at 2:40 pm

   11. Ooooh! Falafel!

2. The_Real_JeffS says:

   December 31, 2006 at 2:54 pm

   No raisins?

3. Dan Collins says:

   December 31, 2006 at 2:54 pm

   He’ll probably lose some weight, too.

4. Robert says:

   December 31, 2006 at 3:44 pm

   It isn’t nice to mock the dead.

   But it is funny.

5. Bill D. Cat says:

   December 31, 2006 at 4:01 pm

   11. Send Kofi nice thank you note….. on second thought , will see him shortly , and thank him in person .

6. Additional Blond Agent says:

   December 31, 2006 at 4:54 pm

   12. Ice water

7. Bill D. Cat says:

   December 31, 2006 at 5:03 pm

   12. Quit smoking

8. andrew says:

   December 31, 2006 at 5:18 pm

   does he believe that virgins stuff? Or is it we that do?

9. MarkD says:

   December 31, 2006 at 6:46 pm

   I think he’s pissed at not making the celebrity death watch 2007 edition.

10. Rusty says:

    December 31, 2006 at 7:05 pm

    2. Send good suit to cleaners

11. MayBee says:

    December 31, 2006 at 7:05 pm

    So are these girls that died virgins or are they virgins created in heaven especially for afterlife porking?
    
    Because, can you imagine going to heaven and being told your assigment is to let Saddam have a first go at you?

12. Harry Bergeron says:

    December 31, 2006 at 8:11 pm

    14. Gotta lose this stoopid beard….

13. Furriskey says:

    January 1, 2007 at 12:03 am

    can you imagine going to heaven and being told your assigment is to let Saddam have a first go at you?

    I’m afraid that’s the way it is in Islam. Count yourself lucky..

14. Pablo says:

    January 1, 2007 at 4:48 am

    5. Lose the neckties. Enough is enough.

15. Ivan Ivanovich says:

    January 1, 2007 at 7:14 am

    Yea well, there were 72 virgins, but we ran out just before your sons arrived.

16. Furriskey says:

    January 1, 2007 at 8:55 am

    I’m not sure you get virgins for being hanged. Now if he had gone down, six-gun blazing, at the bottom of his spider-hole, I think virgins might have been on the table. But they don’t hand out virgins to any old felon who thuds onto the doormat of Paradise like a discount catalogue.

17. CraigC says:

    January 1, 2007 at 9:22 am

    “I picked a bad day to quit heroin.”

    Hey, I saw the 16th Street Mall in Denver on TV last night.  What did you guys do for New Years, Jeff?

18. Jeff Goldstein says:

    January 1, 2007 at 9:49 am

    We spent it at a neighbor’s house, where I drank enough Guinness to fill a bathtub.

    Today I must purge.  So it’ll be nothing but bloody marys, and frozen rum drinks laced with Tylenol or Ibuprofin.

19. CraigC says:

    January 1, 2007 at 10:06 am

    I remember the bad old days when we’d have to go to a sports bar to watch the Skins. Bloody Marys starting at 10 in the morning.  Yeesh. We rarely saw the second game.

20. ahem says:

    January 1, 2007 at 10:06 am

    Saddam is probably finding out right about now that he’s one of the virgins.

    Ix-nay on the Tylenol, Jeff. It destroys your liver when you have alcohol in your system. Seriously. Use something else.

    Otherwise, Happy Fucking New Year, you heartless bastard!

21. ronrob says:

    January 1, 2007 at 9:26 pm

    SADDAM IS IN FOR A BIG DISAPPOINTMENT.  tHEY FOUND AND CORRECTED A MISTAKE IN THE KORAN.  ITS NOT 72 VIRGINS, ITS A 72 YEAR OLD VIRGIN

22. duke says:

    January 2, 2007 at 12:42 am

    Hey .. virgins are okay, but after eight or nine … you need a pro.

23. Quit Smoking says:

    October 8, 2008 at 2:20 pm

    Thanks for this excellent post! As a woman I know that smoking is more harmful to me than it is for men.

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