Remember how fun it was to move into a new place, with new financial obligations? And remember how you had someone handling that certain legal thing on a pro bono basis up to a point? And how that point was reached just at the time that the pro bono part had reached the time when it was pro bono no more?
Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wade through tons of guestblogging to get to the real stuff? Remember how you valued the chance to find out why the armadillo wouldn’t dance? Remember the cutting edge commentary?
Well, we here at National Protein Webio remember that, too. We’re reaching out to you, the National Protein Webio audience, to ask that you give generously to help keep us on the air. You know how you count on NPW to keep you apprised of the commentary on the news. The Conceptual Series? Do you think that grows on trees? Like bananas? Eaten by poo-flinging monkies? Do you?
You know that you count on the wit of the Wisdom. Like that piece about securing ironclad permission before snorting . . . off of the . . . of . . . at your housewarming. How would you know how to handle such a situation if PW weren’t here? We’d like to keep this pledge drive short. Do your part now and hit the PayPal button. Freedom isn’t free, and neither is good counsel.
is this some kind of veiled “we’re holding Jeff for ransom” threat?
Maggie–
Yes.
And every time you ask such an obvious question, we’re going to circumcise him again. So give generously and don’t ask many questions.
Umm, sure. I just moved myself. And I had a year’s worth of unemployment a couple of years ago which hurt, big time. *opens wallet, looks in* Hmm, some ones and a chinese fortune cookie slip.
“You’ll be incrediblly lucky and have big garbanzos!” Can I contribute that? No?
Okay, I’ll check the sofa-cushions. *grumble*
How much for a tote bag? Or maybe a golf umbrella?
Best of all, do you have matching donations?
Mikey,
Anything is appreciated. Do you know that when you go to Goldstein’s account under PayPal, under the old celluloid address, the total number of payments is 314?
Uh . . .
Mikey, don’t worry about it. But for those of you who can . . . let’s put it this way, 3 of those 314 donations were from me. And I am one cheap MoFo.
B Moe,
Rumor has it that Jeff’s going to be rolling out a whole new line of PW gifts for the holiday season. You can wait to buy those for all of the PW fanatics in your life, or you can give directly, but as far as I know no Wahabbi millionaires is willling to match your donation at present. We’re working on it.
We’re also working on getting you a year’s subscription to Mad Magazine if you sign on as a sustaining member at a mere $10 per month. Those humorless bastards drive a hard bargain, though.
Some people have emailed me to ask whether I’ve gotten Jeff’s permission to do this. The answer is . . . what, are you fucking nuts? I emailed him, when I heard about his plight, to ask permission, and when he didn’t answer me within fifteen minutes, I decided I’d just go ahead. Because a) I’m convinced that the need is real, and b) what’s he going to do? Kick me off?
Oh, yeah, we were all amused, and we thought it would be good if he went to the wall. Now’s our time to buy war bonds against intarwebs stupidity. I paid. Not that my financial situation’s good, mind you. What about you?
Son I was licking thighs before you were a twinkle in your daddies eye.
And without salt too.
I’m pretty sure I can get you a good deal on one of Witheld’s non-mold-eaten t-shirts, though. You’d be surprised at how good a band he was in, by the way.
Bravo, Retired Marine. The voice of experience is here.
What do you think they ought to do, Sir?
– I’m getting an eerie feeling here that you’re serious for once in your life Collins. If you are just blink your eyes. Two days tops, when I get payed. Take it or leave it. (and Sempre fi)
iiiiiii don’t know. i think someone involved in this called Dan Collins out recently. and this would reallllly annoy them.
you bastard!
BBh, I’ll take it. *blink*
I have the feeling that the guy’s totally stressed, financially and emotionally. I’d tell you why, but I think he’s probably passed out, and can’t give me permission. I’m sure that he’s going to be pissed at me, but he can take a number and wait in line, like everybody else.
Maggie,
You’ll notice how I didn’t respond to the provocation. I think someone has a crush on me. Too bad. I’ve got this sad attachment to what I think is right.
m’kay.
You know, if Jeff were conscious right now, I imagine he’d be saying something ridiculous, like how he’d already had a bleg this year. I’m probably going to be banned when this is all over.
Which would, you know, put me way ahead of monkyboy.
Well look at the bright side Collins. If it happens at least you won’t have to change anymore trolls diapers.
Honestly, can you think of a site where it’s more difficult to get banned? No, you can’t. Send your donations to PW via PayPal. Because the chances of your getting banned are really, really small. Unless you’re totally psycho.
BBh, I prefer to think of them as “nappies.”
yeah, I’d be willing to give more if I could get the troll of my choice banned.
We might be able to arrange that, Maggie. Everything’s negotiable, but I just got a “yes, I could use the help, but what the f*** are you doing?” email from Jeff. So, as much as I like Jeff . . . well, screw him, because, as usual, I know better than anyone else.
….Because the chances of your getting banned are really, really small.
Unless you’re totally psychoUnless you can’t type in anything but swahili pornographic symbols…Ok…the blogothon will go on apace….Now can we get back to discussing Einstiens theory of tits and gravity…..
All right. It’s nearly midnight here, and my teenager wants the computer, and he’s waited pretty patiently. So, it’s up to you all to really piss Jeff off by forwarding this information on to other sites. I’ll take the fall, and if anyone doesn’t believe there’s a need there, I will just have to choke up the email I got about Jeff’s situation, even if it means that he’s going to fly to Vermont and squeeze my nuts off.
He seems to have it in his head that because he blegged once this year, he can’t do it again in good conscience, especially because he’s been busy with other stuff recently. He also seems to be a bit pissed that I’ve taken it upon myself to start up this bleg without his permission. To which I can only quote Witheld: “As if.” “Don’t even.”
You know how NPR has been begging from you this last week or so? You know how Garrison Keillor has been making fun of it? Fuck ‘em. All that money they wanted you to send? Send it to Jeff. And if he boots me off the site, that’s one fewer pseudo-Jeff you have to deal with.
Thanks.
Dan – make sure everyone remembers to bump this up under the header….and I expect lots of snappy updates Sargent! carry on…..
Woah. Now that’s quite a donation. Is B Moe willing to match that?
Maybee…. Moe already offered to eat one and store the other one for winter….Dans going to be 2 inches shorter when this is all over…..
I will go to Vermont and freeze my nuts off, but that is my limit.
The previous post may have a solution to that problem in it.
Dan, your wish is my command. Just sent what I could.
Dan, think we can get a little-guy-Friday post out of this bleg? Dare to dream.
I think that’s within the scope of possibility, and thanks, PattyAnn. I’ll agitate.
– GAY Friday…Gay Friday….whats with this Gay Friday thing because I think it’s just terrible what they’re doing to our Fridays and I-I-I-I’m going to raise hell if they don’t stop….
– No…no….Not “Gay”…”Guy”….”Guy fridays” Mz Littela…..
– Ohhhh… well ….that’s different… Nevermind….
BBh, it Little Guy Fridays!
I hear there’s one episode about some Blue Boy?
Hmmm….I think that was episode #14 Patty…
– Spanking the Chior – “Organ lessons”
TW: what73 …. I thought there was only 72?