Any of you interested in trying to come up with some theme music for our show?—something along the lines of the “Vent” theme but peculiar to our little internet teevee thing?
If so, please do. Email me the files or post them here in the comments.
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Recent Comments
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Get the Hawaii 5-0 theme music and play it backwards. Or play is sideways for that matter.
T.W. Steve McGarrett drove a piece of crap car.
I don’t have the file Jeff, but there can be only one tune for your show: Secret Agent Man
I’ll get my kazoo and whip something tasty up for you!
What rhymes with Zionist?
Mmmm mmmm… dah de dum mmmm mmmm.
Mmmm mmmm… dah de dum dum dum.
Deee dah doo da dum de doo da de day ooooh
Mmmm mmmm…
Repeat a few times.
Let me know how you want to handle the royalty checks.
JOOOOOOOO!
duh…
tw: ironist Oh, so you think you can do better, eh?
Two words: Sanford and Son.
And don’t point out that that is three words. Reuters doesn’t have to be accurate so I don’t either.
Hava Nagila?
It’s the only Jooo song I know. And it has a catchy beat, so the ‘dillo can dance to it to fill in down time.
TW: last
This is the first and should be the </i>last<i> time I give musical advice.
How about the theme song from “Mr. Ed”? Its catchy, and I doubt anyone is using it right now.
I assume you mean a music stinger like Hot Air’s, as oppposed to a music bed that would be under the whole time. You might have to go to a service for that. If Dorka has access to a digital audio editor, he could produce one from whatever song you like.
Here’s a 10-15 second clip for $20, no royalties, kind of in the HotAir theme.
The first twenty seconds of ‘Barney Google’ by Spike Jones and his City Slickers would work, imo.
here
“Love Me Or Die, Bitch”
love me or die bitch
make up your mind quick
love me or die bitch
look me up the eye friend
i am a man
i’m an animal
i’m a witch
which am i?
better love me now
you better milk my cow
you better shut up
my mind just gave up
–The Frogs
Not the beginning, BS, because it has to sting out. The end would work, and it’s hella funny. I love Spike Jones.
How about that dance number from “Pulp Fiction” with John Travolta and what’s her name? You would probably have to get permission…oops nevermind…you are teh OTHER!
Here you go, Jeff. This is perfect.
Well…..there’s always “Jesus Loves Me”.
Wack Wack. Track 12 of the Bad News Bears Soundtrack.
TW: music. go figure.
Yeah, you could be being chased by some nurses wearing hot pants and a guy in an armadillo suit.
Dude,
One Tin Soldier from Billy Jack! Interspersed with a voiceover of nuggets of Cindy Sheehan’s immortal musings.
Johnny Cash did a cover of “Personal Jesus”
Does it have to be original or can it be a clip out of an current song?
The theme from “The A-Team”. Just the first bit at the beginning, fade in, and then fade out and end bit at the end. Perfect.
“I love it when a plan comes together!”
tw: corps No, they were in the army, you stupid machine.
If it’s a Jayyy-zus reference you’re after, you can’t go wrong with Kinky Friedman: “They Don’t Make Jews Like Jesus Any More” …
I was thinking maybe the intro to “The Andy Griffith Show”.
“Ballad of the 101st Fighting Keyboardistsâ€Â
Fighting soldiers from the keys
Fearless men who blog and seethe
Mouse clutched in the steely fist
These are the fightin’ keyboardists.
Chickenhawks upon their chest
These are men, America’s best
Peaceniks may moan and piss
But they’ll never beat down the keyboardists.
Trained to live off bags of chips
Finishing flame wars victorious
Hanging in as Iraq gets worse
Courage deep, from the 101st
Chickenhawks upon their chest
These are men, America’s best
Peaceniks may moan and piss
But they’ll never beat down the keyboardists.
Back in bed a young wife waits
Her marriage left in dire straits
But flaming liberals takes some time
Nothing left for a woman’s whine.
Put the chickenhawk upon your chest
Make you one of America’s best
Hanging in as Iraq get worse
Courageous men of the 101st.
If you can use published music, then you’re in The Mac Buckets’ Wheelhouse. If not, get someone talented to write a 10 second rock riff that’s kind of a similar to Elastica’s “Connection” or the first :10 of the Beastie Boys’ “Sabotage.”
Vent’s theme is also similar in style to the first :10 of Arctic Monkeys’ “I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor,” so you might look at that.
Anyhoo, if I got a show, I’d want the opening :20 from Superchunk’s “Hyper Enough” (kind of like this, from the Amazon.com Realplayer clip) to be the theme.
I would suggest one of two tracks from the “Stripes” soundtrack. “March” or “Depression.”
… and then, depression sets in.
Dream Weaver
“They Ain’t Makin’ Jews . . .” is good, but I like “Get Your Biscuits In the Oven and Your Buns In the Bed” myself. (You do know that Kinky’s running for governor this year? Sample bumperstickers: “He ain’t Kinky, he’s my Governor” and “My Governor is a Jewish Cowboy”. If elected, he will work for the “de-wussifuication” of Texas . . . heh-heh.)
Now that I’m thinking about it (a little), if you could get someone to crib something like the first 35 sec of Elastica’s “2:1”, only compressed into about 10 sec, you’d have something there.
I nominate Norman Greenbaums “Spirit in the Sky”.
Great opening riff, ‘in your face Allah’ lyrics, and written by a fellow Jooooo. What more could you ask for?
Yeah, we can’t use licensed music, so I was hoping that some of you musicians out there might come up with something original.
The Ballad of Jeff Goldstein
Come and listen to my story ‘bout a man named Jeff
A poor bloggerguy barely kept his family fed
And then one day he was shootin’ at a lib
And it was discovered that he was sorta glib
Haiku … armadillos
Well, the first thing ya’ know old Jeff was on tv
Pertendin’ to be as real as you or me
The viewers couldn’t tell one Jeff from tha’ other
But they laughed their asses off at the antics of that mother!
Zionist … irony
Ok – I’m through! Give me a head start before you shoot.
I’ll give it a whirl. Been a while since I wrote anything, but a 15-second intro should be easier than a regular three-to-four minute piece, surely.
I know a great theme song but Benny Hill used it already.
How about “One Thing Leads to Another” (“Do whatchoo want, say whatchoo mean, one thing leads to another…”) or Llita Ford’s “Kiss Me Deadly”?
How about something along the lines of the “boom chicka boom chicka boom” sound that you hear in so many Johnny Cash songs?
Hi, i’m a songwriter. i write songs for shows, plays, etc. i was thinkinh this:
As i walk around
this summmer day.
See the plants and beatuy in the air
i remember something…out there
Its something close, something wild,
cant let it loose,its coming soon
something new, across the eeaaaaarthhh
its coming around, coming.
i dont know cant see cant smell cant tell you what it is its a new word…something new…has come across…
thanks for reading my song.
Peter Gunn theme as done by Emerson Lake & Palmer
“Blue Steel”?
TW: black. No,Blue you touring twit.
One word: Bob Dylan
Too bad you can’t ‘borrow’ Fagan’s tune (he did send that Russian dude after Owen Wilson, after all) but this is Perfect:
In the mornin you go gunnin’
For the man who stole your water
And you fire till he is done in
But they catch you at the border
And the mourners are all singin’
As they drag you by your feet
But the hangman isn’t hangin’
And they put you on the street
You go back Jack do it again
Wheel turnin’ ‘round and ‘round
You go back Jack do it again
Or, ask for this one
Forget that Barnes & Noble Link! This one!
Freebird!
Something without copyright issues would be preferable.
Exactly.
OK, so that limits the reconizibility of the tune. Go here to download a royalty-free sound in various categories (try some country sound for the redneck, maybe an urban beat for the yippie)
Royalty-free doesn’t mean free; they want like $29.95 for immediate download…
“Government Cheese” – The Rainmakers
Give a man a free house and he’ll
Bust out the windows
Put his family on foodstamps
Now he’s a big spender
No food on the table and the bills ain’t paid
Cause he spent it on cigarettes and P.G.A.
They’ll turn us all into beggars
Because they’re easier to please
They’re feeding our people that Government Cheese
That’s what I’m talkin’ about.
Clearly you need more musicians and fewer comedians.
A cut from the intro to Die Valkyrie would be free, additionally there would be the value of attracting an audience composed of “hey, that’s from Apocalypse Now” plus the Bugs Bunny contingent and another composed of “Goldstein picked Wagner?” group who would enjoy Kinky Friedman but are more Randy Newman at heart.
For my money it’s Afternoon Delight, “Anchorman” version.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4422445182583978824&q=afternoon+delight
C D E F F EE DD C (hold)
Lyrics:
This is the stort-est theme song in the world (hold)
If you’re doing a particularly dark and serious segment I highly suggest patrick swazey’s “She’s like the Wind”.
If you want just pure class with no comedic overtones then Billy Joel has some real recognizable classics, “Scenes from an Italian Restaurant”, “Piano man”, “Only the Good Die Young”, etc…
So long and thanks for all the frish
So sad that it should come to this
We tried to warn you all but oh dear?
You may not share our intellect
Which might explain your disrespect
For all the natural wonders that
grow around you
So long, so long and thanks
for all the frish
The world’s about to be destroyed
There’s no point getting all annoyed
Lie back and let the planet dissolve
Despite those nets of tuna fleets
We thought that most of you were sweet
Especially tiny tots and your
pregnant women
So long, so long, so long, so long, so long
So long, so long, so long, so long, so long
So long, so long and thanks
for all the frish
(yeah)
So long and thanks for all the fish
So sad that it should come to this
We tried to warn you all but oh dear?
(oh dear)
Despite those nets of tuna fleets
We thought that most of you were sweet
Especially tiny tots and your
pregnant women
So long, so long, so long, so long, so long
So long, so long, so long, so long, so long
So long, so long and thanks
for all the frish
tw: u SAW that comming
I have been blogging at Protein Wisdom
Now I do videos for Hot Air
Mainly reporting with humor in them
Touching on issues CBS wouldn’t dare
Where, oh where are you tonight?
Why did you leave me here all alone?
I searched the world over and I thought I’d found true love
You met another and <pfbbt!> you was gone.
Huh? Huh?
No…?
Eh.
Everybody Knows- L.Cohen
How about a rap song with heavy sampling (legal limit) and modified lyrics of Henley’s Dirty Laundry, or is that too obvious??
I make my living off the evening news
Just give me something, something I can use
People love it when you lose, they love dirty laundry
Well, I could’ve been a blogger, but I wound up here
I just have to look good, I don’t have to be clear
Come and whisper in my ear, give us dirty laundry
Kick ‘em when they’re up, kick ‘em when they’re down X 3
Kick ‘em when they’re up, kick ‘em all around
You get the idea …
TW: we can discuss TERMS later, on the PLANE …
The tune here is pretty catchy.
How about something old enough it’s in the public domain, like the “Dawn” section of Also Sprach Zarathustra. A bit of googling came up with this MIDI file that you could probably play with.
Since a MIDI is ‘performed’ by the sound card on your computer, there is no conductor or orchestra to have a copyright in the performance.
TW: This appeared to me as the best thing short of composing an original “Action News” style piece (evoking Morse Code transmission of the breaking story), because if you’re going to go for something over the top, you might as well do it right.
I’m sorry, but folks are taking bets:
http://209.197.106.133/19580222/rock/kinks/Lola.mid
1. Al, you LAY OFF Steve McGarrett’s Mercury Marquis. It remains the ONLY TV cop car guaranteed to squeal tires arriving, departing, even on sand.
2. “Foggy Mountain Breakdown”…or “Runnin’ with the Devil”…what can I say, I’m eclectic.
How about Verdi’s Dies Irae from the Requiem?
tw: Might tweek those the opera enthusiasts, no? Heh…
Great, a musician’s cattle call.
Let’s think “public domain”, shall we?
SB: person
that one’s got a goat….
No time (not soon, anyway) to make it myself, but this popped into my head:
“Citizen! Journalist!” fits the only part anyone remembers from “Jesus Christ Superstar” (not that anyone should sing; just make the melodic allusion), that melody already sounds like a parodic news theme (add standard teletype rhythm), and thieving for funny is fair use.
I’d laugh. Once.
Jeff, if you like I can compose something specific for you. You can check out some of my work at http://www.soundclick.com/johnbernsen/. Something along the lines of the Vent theme would be very easy to do.
I hear Tangerine Dream is looking for some work.
Seriously, I do that sort of thing for part of my erstwhile living, if you email me, I’ll link you to a few things or we could discuss a custom whatever along whatever lines you may be thinking, if I can pull it off.
Be careful about copyright infringements, that is why it is often better to get someone like me to write something one off that you can copyright and own and be done with it.
TW is group, as in I’ve played in many a group over the years.
.
Someone beat me to “One Tin Soldier,” so I’ll suggest you rent Broadcast News and lift the dinky Casiotone version of the news theme that the two guys roll out for the exec in the booth.
MMmmm….could you be more specific? Are you looking for “sting” music, to catch attention at the beginning of a segment….”travelling” music to underlay the setup….”theme” music to identify Jeff….or a sort-of-anthemish thing to say, “Citizen Journalist” wherever used?
Too bad you and that musical genius Triscuit (or whatever) aren’t friends anymore. What was his name again?
I bet he’d make Atrios a theme song for nothing.
oh, are you thinking of, um, Todd, MayBee? the drummer?
Mmmm… I think it might have been Tristero. He was a conductor or something. I actually don’t think that he and Jeff were ever friends, or that Tristero was ever right.
Hey Maggie! Maybe you could do an opening dance sequence for Jeff!
Bolero – A seven minute song that is supposed to be sex as music.
Either that or the Knight Rider theme song.
TW: Come on, Jeff, give your audience what they want.
I wonder what it would cost to get the rights to “I’ve got friends in low places.”
Continue to ignore the greatest theme song of all time at your peril.
I refer to ZOOM of course.
The intro (before the singing) of “Get Out of Denver” by Bob Seeger.
After seeing your redneck getup in the anti-Israel petition piece it naturally must be I’m Too Sexy by Right Said Fred.
Shameless Plug My nephews group ‘The Waiting Game’has a few good cutsd on their CDShameless Plug
I posted in the comments section to your Vent, Jeff, that your theme should either be “Baby I’m a Star” by Prince or “Can’t Touch This” by MC Hammer.
“I’m dope on the floor and I’m magic on the mike.”
ooooooh, tristero…. triscuit, that’s right. but really, how hard is it to wave your arms around?
uh, and i only dance badly, and heavily, my sister on the other hand….. oh, and if we’re shamelessly plugging, she sings with these folks, recently named best cover band by the OKC Gazette.
I can’t believe I’m the first to suggest Numa Numa.
Since someone beat me to a great Rainmakers suggestion:
March of the Swivelheads – The (English) Beat
Can’t get enough of that crazy Matthew Broderick’s antics…
I’m feeling a little Les Cleypool bass slapping. (of course only original material)
It’s a damn shame though. I can hear “Wynonna’s Big Brown Beaver” in my mind. It sounds perfect.
“This is the song that never ends.”
“One of these days everything that I want’s gonna be mine.
But if it ain’t that’ll be alright as long as there’s sunshine……
…and
a big
ole
brew.”
The Who’s “Won’t Get Fooled Again”
or maybe
“Pinhead”, by The Ramones
Pink Floyd’s ”One of These Days”?
I’m thinking the Batman theme would be better. The one from the TV show, of course.
Nah, nah…nah, nah…nah, nah…nah, nah
Nah, nah…nah, nah…nah, nah…nah, nah
GOLDSTEIN!
etc.
Can someone record a heavy-metal version of the theme from “Dragnet”?
I’d love to hear that.
“Just the facts, goddammit! Just the facts.”
There’s the Art of Noise version of Dragnet – that would work.
.
Ah yes, with the Tom Hanks sample, “Must be what keeps your hair up.”
Forget the Rest, This is the Best.
http://www.discoverynet.com/~ajsnead/allsongs_1/mission2.html
Primus—My Name is Mudd.