Merrick: “I AM NOT AN ANIMAL!â€Â
Me: “I am. I am the walrus, bro.”
Merrick: “– I AM A HUMAN BEING!â€Â
Me: “Fine, have it your way. But just so’s you know, you’re missing out on some totally bitchin’ tusks.”
Search
Archive Calendar
| M | T | W | T | F | S | S |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 2 | 3 | ||||
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
| 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 |
| 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 |
| 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | |
Archives
Categories
- A Government That Can Force You to Buy Health Insurance Can Make You Do Anything (3)
- a protein wisdom philosophy primer (3)
- academics (25)
- armadillo (8)
- Friday Fiction 100 Word Challenge (51)
- from the protein wisdom conceptual series (136)
- identity politics (33)
- If Republicans Win the Senate in 2014 (1)
- in which celebraties comment on current events (67)
- language / intentionalism (88)
- legal (6)
- My brief conversations with inanimate objects (130)
- NSA / FISA (46)
- One Term to Serve, the 2012 Revival (6)
- Overheard in a Fallujah bunker (27)
- Poems from 196x, Revised by the Ghost of Richard Brauti (27)
- protein wisdom's DNC coverage (30)
- protein wisdom's RNC coverage (29)
- protein wisdom: the movie Lists (20)
- Provocateurism (16)
- real-time empirical observations (51)
- red pills found behind the sofa cushions (42)
- Scenes from my driveway (61)
- Talking back to 80s music (41)
- The Martha Stewart Chronicles (58)
- The protein wisdom interviews (10)
- The protein wisdom original poems (142)
- Uncategorized (20,046)
- Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance, abridged (34)
Recent Comments
- In The Mailbox: 02.28.23 (Afternoon Edition) : The Other McCain on Hey, longtime pw readers…
- In The Mailbox: 12.23.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll truly IS a sad, embittered psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
- In The Mailbox: 07.18.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
And being the Eggman! I’ve always wanted to be the Eggman.
tw: Come together, right now…
Well… well… I am Spartacus!
Uh, Chief, them ain’t tusks, it’s just wadded up kleenex.
Have you been mixing something in with the NyQuil? Personally a gin gimlet and NyQuil = 10 hour coma.
If you were a narwhal, you’d only have one.
But it would be VERY long….
Dude, snap the tusk off and make scrimshaw. They’re really valuable and make a fine mantle piece.
Damn. I wanted to be the Eggman.
Meg, maybe you could be the Eggwoman, huh?
Goo goo g’ joob!
Walrus be some mighty fine eatin’…
Eggwoman might be okay.
I’m just sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come . . .
Walrus is destroying the town square mom & pop stores. Poleaxe on the ice when they’re helpless babies, I say.
Hee hee hee
Ha ha ha…
Now the Islamists are dissing on Freddie Mercury.
Y’know, this is just going to sound wrong no matter how I say it, but sometimes it seems better when some people die young.
I mean, can you imagine a 60-year-old Freddie Mercury?
Sure, we see other 60+ rockers. But – Freddie Mercury?
It’s better to remember him as beautiful as he was.
Maybe.
TW Not sure if I’m on board with my own thought.
I didn’t mean to kill the thread. Carry on.
The thread has been officially killed.
Throwing out random subject…
The man who invented Jaegermeister also created Grey Goose…give me back my life!
and….go…
Goo goo jajoob.
crickets
Sigh…
That song put me off custard for life. Especially the yellow matter kind. Used to be my favorite, too.
Curse, you John Lennon!
Tusks, dammit! Narwhals have them! Walri have them! Elephants have them!
But not elephant seals.
Discuss.
Are we talking Fleetwood Mac?
Kookookachoo?
Maybe on topic, maybe off topic…it`s hard to tell around here….. I went through ALL of The Martha Stewart Chronicles last night for the first time(and yes i`m fucking blind today, curse your sick ass Goldstein). To any newbie here, check the archives. They truly are GOLD!!!!
TW: tribbing, as in Martha did`nt have much to look foreward to except …… never mind, not even a word generator would go where I was thinking of going.
Oh, Bill. Please, don’t use the apostrophe next to the 1 key. Use the one next to the semicolon. What with the war going on and unrest in the Middle East, can we afford to be careless about our punctuation?
Protein Wisdom rules! Informative and educational. Damned left leaning apostle thingy, my bad(it’s a Canadian thing EH!).
No…I am Spartacus!
No, I am Spartacus! Here, I’ll show you!
(unrolls poster of Helen Thomas in black rubber bra and garters)
Now, would anybody have sick shit like that and brag about it?
Ya Philistines…
JD loses the thread.
…..blegh…..
Goddammit. I always get here too late to be the Eggman. Can’t we have more than one Eggman? Please? I’m so fucking tired of being a Dead Dog’s Eye. I’m tired of the fucking Dead Dog’s Eye, I hate the fucking Dead Dog’s Eye. It doesn’t have any lines; it just sits there.
And whoever was playing the Dead Dog’s Eye before had B.O. or threw up in it or something because the costume smells. The armpits stink. There’s dried custard on the inside of the mask. It needs a good cleaning. It sucks.
What about Semolina Pilchard? Is that role still open?
JD: Helen Thomas? What are you trying to do? Run this blog into the ground?
ahem, every time I have to go to “Urban Dictionary”, I come back feeling far less clean. Please don’t make me look up Dead Dog’s Eye. I’m just trying to get over the Zen of “tribbing”…
Nobody gets to be the Semolina Pilchard but me. I’m the only one who knows the trick to climbing up the Eiffel Tower.
TW: elevator—okay, dammit, somebody’s gonna pay for that leak!
ahem,
Hows about you be a smoking joker? The bitching is giving me a headache.
Man, you’ve been a naughty boy
You let your face grow long
TW: The opposite of short.
In one of the great “Plate of Shrimp” moments ever–the above was the name of the unrecorded Beatles reunion album.
Tribbing …….MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!
That wasn’t the only thing that grew long…I saw the naughty girl with her knickers down.
So…when do you figure the Pornographic Priestess is gonna stop by?
Me? I’m just in it for the hot wings and JoJos. Wull, that, and the complimentary foot massage from the slightly overweight librarian chick.
Dude, that is like so insensitive.
Wouldn’t an elephant seal be more appropriate?
Oh, and before anyone else beats me to it…
SHUT THE FUCK UP DONNY!!!
WHERE’S THE FUCKING PIE????
I WANT PIE!!
I am Spartacme.
We are Spartacus.
I am Spartacus of Borg. You will be assimilated.