me: “I know you generally dig the apple pie on the 4th, but how about this year we go with red white and blue-frosted cupcakes, instead? As a change of pace?”
my patriotism:
my patriotism: “HOW DARE YOU QUESTION MY ME!”
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Recent Comments
- In The Mailbox: 02.28.23 (Afternoon Edition) : The Other McCain on Hey, longtime pw readers…
- In The Mailbox: 12.23.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll truly IS a sad, embittered psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
- In The Mailbox: 07.18.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
That reminds me of a nationalism I once knew. It was very outgoing but never stopped to think that wearing flip-flops to the Vatican was offensive to some.
Would it be unpatriotic to shove an M-80 up Reids wahzoo on the 4th? Not that I want to get that close to it…
I can tell you’re trying to make a joke. I think you are making fun of people who question other people’s patriotism. But I don’t really get it other than that – it doesn’t seem funny to me.
Whaddamy missing, here?
It’s sort of a running/inside joke. It takes a while to get them all. It also takes a sense of humor.
But don’t worry, you won’t be here long enough to get either.
There isn’t enough bandwidth in the intertrons…
Who are you calling “cupcake,” Sweetheart? *sneer*
You mean besides at least two quarts of brain oil and a working alternator?
You got me. I don’t know you very well.
Though I’d venture to say a nice long tongue kiss from Charles Krauthammer wouldn’t hurt you.
I’ll venture a guess and say a brain.
I’m not a Doctor of Psychology but…I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
About 40-50 IQ points, a strong grip on reality and a sense of humor.
ahh for chrissake Goldstein, I just wasted a sixpack of Molsen in a lower thread when I discusted myself, now you waste another 2 for me. Any more of that sh*t and I’m going to have to make a “b” double “e” “r” “r” “u” “n”!
that’s “b” double “e” double “r” “u” “n”
A penis?
Well, humor is tough to share across such a gulf as
I expect this will tickle your particular funny bone.
Here ya go.
really, would that hurt anyone?
Jim–
C’mon, now. That penis remark was out of line. I’m man enough to admit that I have a certain amount of breast envy.
A clue?
Commenting prophetically on the likely descent of the 1789 French Revolution into its Jacobin “terrorist†phase, Edmund Burke said that:
“The true danger is when liberty is nibbled away, for expedience, and by partsâ€Â.
Words of wisdom from the 18th century’s greatest conservative thinker that Attorney General Alberto Abu Ghraibzalez should meditate upon before jailing hapless Haitian bogeymen…
The public is still intoxicated with the Fox brand of pseudo-patriotic propaganda in vogue in the “heartlandâ€Â: if/when a free citizenry sobers up, it might be too late to save democracy in America…
But who really cares anyway?
In a famous 1840 conference, Thomas Carlyle recounts the discreet death of Paganism (as incarnated by Thor) in 11th century Europe- a poignant tale and possible template for the silent death of democracy in 21st century America:
“King Olaf, the Christian Reform King, is sailing with fit escort along the shore of Norway, from haven to haven; dispensing justice, or doing other royal work: on leaving a certain haven, it is found that a stranger, of grave eyes and aspect, red beard, of stately robust figure, has stept in. The courtiers address him; his answers surprise by their pertinency and depth: at length he is brought to the King. The stranger’s conversation here is not less remarkable, as they sail along the beautiful shore; but after some time, he addresses King Olaf thus: “Yes, King Olaf, it is all beautiful, with the sun shining on it there; green, fruitful, a right fair home for you; and many a sore day had Thor, many a wild fight with the rock Jotuns, before he could make it so. And now you seem minded to put away Thor. King Olaf, have a care!” said the stranger, drawing down his brows;  and when they looked again, he was nowhere to be found.  This is the last appearance of Thor on the stage of this world!
Do we not see well enough how the Fable might arise, without unveracity on the part of any one? It is the way most Gods have come to appear among men: thus, if in Pindar’s time “Neptune was seen once at the Nemean Games,” what was this Neptune too but a “stranger of noble grave aspect,”  fit to be “seen”! There is something pathetic, tragic for me in this last voice of Paganism. Thor is vanished, the whole Norse world has vanished; and will not return ever again. In like fashion to that, pass away the highest things. All things that have been in this world, all things that are or will be in it, have to vanish: we have our sad farewell to give them. That Norse Religion, a rude but earnest, sternly impressive Consecration of Valor (so we may define it), sufficed for these old valiant Northmen. Consecration of Valor is not a bad thing!â€Â
Consecration of Democracy is not (was not?) a bad thing either…
Mr. Goldstein! Mr. GOOOOOLDSTEEEEEIN! *Sob* Deb is questioning my patriotism! Make her stoooop!
Speaking of spew alerts, there’s Dr. Vic.
Bogeymen? Come on boy, call ‘em like you see ‘em!
I don’t know, would that lower my chances with Morton?
I recognized Dr. Vic’s handiwork less than one sentence into his comment. You are getting predictable Doc. Why don’t you try throwing a curveball and make some sense once in a while. Just a thought.
Captain, two trolls coming up on starboard!
The line forms at the back Maggie. You’ve got to wait your turn behind Bill from INDC.
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Goldstein are you saying Bush isn’t Hitler??
Whaddamy missing, here?
TW: during What did you do during the war?
Robert A. Heinlein, April 5, 1973, lecture at the Naval Academy
Interesting, Darleen. Does Heinlein go on to explain why it’s so logical that patriotism is so vital? I’m just curious as to the rationale behind this logic.
jeezuss ach christ. i give you guys an easy set-up and alls I get is a bunch of lame punches.
Last time I try to play straight man!
KC…yes Excerpt
“i give you guys an easy set-up”
Uh-huh…THAT’S what it was.
Sure.
Heinlein? Not Heinlein, Darleen . . .
“Attorney General Alberto Abu Ghraibzalez”. Like it. It’s going into the lexicon with “McChimpy BushHitlerBurton”. You lefties are good for something, even if it’s inadvertent.
TW: youre C’mon, Mr. Turing, get some punctuation why don’t you?
Which leads to the question: could Dr. Vic qualify as this site’s Spurwing Plover? Or would he have to battle it out with actus?
My money would be on Vega in that event, for creative use of bolding and italics.
Darleen,
Good stuff, thanks.
Geez – I forgot Witheld! Surely he wins hands-down, no?
Spurwing and Witheld: Brothers-In-Arms.
Posted by Dr Victorino de la Vega | permalink
on 07/03 at 05:10 PM
WTF was that?
Darleen I think I love you.
tw: husband. yes I am one.
N O’Brain
A Kos-aping rant that the author is probably quite proud of, but is completely unaware that it is pseudo-intellectual gibberish.
TW: Of all the things the good “Doctor” has lost, he misses his mind the most.
Here is romance for us to try,
Here is the chance we can’t deny.
While heaven’s giving us a break,
Let s fall in love for heaven’s sake.
-Billie Holiday, 1958
– I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again. You can’t question a Lefturds patriotism, because you can’t question something they don’t have.
– Patriotism requires two things that Lefties choke on. Respect for anything, and the tiniest modicum of responsibility.
– Self-loathing Narcissists (Neo-Liberals): Those that hate mirrors and Republicans.
“How dare you question my me.”
I get it! It used to say “How dare you question my patriotism.” but it’s patriotism who’s talking. So it’s how dare you question my me! That is so clever! I don’t know what got into my silly little noggin when I deduced that Jeff and his peanut gallery were not the sharpest tacks on the block.
He is SO sharp and tacky! My bad!!!!
You are SOOOOOOO funny, Jeffrey!
The joke was better in the original French, SWPaw.
Darleen, From your link:
Actually, the passage that directly follows tells us all we’ll ever need to know about him (and I suspect, all that he would ever want us to know):
If that all of us could be so worthy—all of our troops are. Thanks for posting that Darleen.
– Try hard to keep up southwestwench…..We don’t linger for stragglers….
A good opportunity to remain quiet?
That would be “in the box”, you silly little noggin you: the sharpest tacks in the box.
Geez, how much did Daddy pay for this PhD of yours?
Jeff  I don’t want to alarm you, but I think your patriotism may be a hypcrite. I have it on good authority his apple pie is made with Mt. Fuji apples and not decent, patriotic American Granny Smiths…
jdm: That would be “in the boxâ€Â, you silly little noggin you: the sharpest tacks in the box.
People who join the gang to attack trolls are the lowest form of life in the blogosphere. The lowest of the low are people who find tiny typos by trolls who are whipping off many posts a day, fighting off attacks on all fronts.
Your pitiful, pathetic, tiny trickle on my ankle is not as bad as getting on someone’s case for confusing its and it’s but it is close, jdm. You are in the running for tiniest stream on the ankle award – keep it up! You could get win the golden shower star yet!
There is a troll ethos?
Tang marvels.
SWP —
So that’s how it works, huh? You’re free to attack at will, because those who hit back are the lowest form of life in the blogosphere.
How convenient. Why not just cut out the middleman though and say that anybody who doesn’t agree with you is a neuron-challenged wrongheaded closeted gay?
Oh. Because you like the intermediary step of feeling victimized for getting a dose of your own medicine, forgot.
Don’t mind me. Crank that music box, fez monkey!
Also, ankles are being befouled. Most distressing.
[In actuality, Tang posts only because the previoius TW was “hit,” and the current one is “miss” – the device taunts me!]
Meg marvels, too. The things you learn! No wonder she’s a Ph.D.!
[Adopts a phony pretentous intonation]
But its not the contived anthropormorphism assigned to ‘patritoism’ that makes this truely witty; that is only the first of several layers of the humor that combined make this a brief but classic Goldstein witticism. It is the over-exaggerated self-righteous anger conveyed in one sentence on the part of patriotism with regard to a simple change in dessert that forms the next layer of the joke. This is, obviously, mirrored in the self-righteous defensive anger of some of those on the American political landscape. The third layer is formed by the white star-shaped candies strategically placed on the blue icing on top of the cupcake, which give the whole piece a delightful assymetry. The fourth layer of the joke is formed from the audience reaction and particpation in the joke. It is this avant-garde layer that gives the joke its real punch, especially those who do not fully comprehend the inner layers.
swp, sweetheart, it wasn’t a typo: you got it wrong. Like as dumb as screendoors on battleships or make like a tree and get the hell outta here.
And if my “pitiful, pathetic, tiny trickle on [your] ankle” was so pitiful, pathetic, and tiny, you sure spent a lot of time, words and wasted energy wiping it off.
And perhaps you want to talk about this fascination you seem to have with urination… this isn’t the first time you’ve mentioned it.
I’ve heard that she can speak French too, Meg. Such accomplishments are beyond Tang’s reckoning.
No, I am the true-blue American fruit. Who is red. And delicious.
–
Actus, Dr Victorino de la Vega, and southwestpaw in…:
TW: natural
Born Trolls!
On this July 4th, let us celebrate those unsung heroes of the blogosphere, the trolls, and their never-ending quest to make this a better world. What would the blogosphere be like without the troll, to nobly liven up serious debates by injecting deliberatly inflammatory rhetoric and personal assaults into otherwise dull and lifeless serious discussions? And it is truely a thankless task, as for their ceaseless work, they are rewarded with an uprovoked barrage of attacks from all fronts.
So, America, let us stand up and give thanks to the troll, for helping to keep America great.
Civilis – I’m fighting back a tear, now.
Civilis, man, that was just beautiful. Reading that, I gotta a little shiver of patriotic delight (aka fascist delight, right swp?).
This is a wonderful country.
God Bless America!
swp, sweetheart
IMPOTENT RAPIST!
/St. Amanda
CEASE IMMEDIATELY THE EYE-RAPING!
[further channeling Amanda of the Blessed Marcotte]
Er, um, that is, THE RAPING WITH THE EYES!
NOT THE EYE-RAPING, WHICH IS A DISTRESSING CONCEPT IN THE EXTREME, UNLESS OF COURSE IT ALLUDES TO “ANDALUSIAN DOG” AND THEN WE’RE KINDA COOL WITH IT, BUT ONLY IN A WAY.
SORTA.
HUZZAH!
Especially trolls who think mockery and derision are an attack, those are my favorites.
More drinks for Master Tang!
More drinks for Master Tang!
Tang is honored, and requests a double.
lee, Mark, N. O’Brain
Thank you. I’ve rarely found a more moving and clear lecture on patriotism than Heinlein’s address at the Naval Academy.
Given at a time when the Winter Soldier follies dominated the culture, it is a spot-on response to the greying hippies trying to recapture their youth by prancing in tie-dyed shirts and holding paper mache puppets in contemporary “anti-war” rallies.
Where by Odin’s beard the fuck hast put Mjolnir, woman? I have valor to consecrate by troll-thrashing!
(Gravely) Where by Isis’ oyster hast stowed the trident, woman? I have pricks to . . . I mean trolls to prick!
And in less than one day she’s reduced to “Sticks and stones.”
How did you get a PhD without ever attending third grade? They must pass the damn things out like toilet paper…
Speaking of St Amanda of the Rosey Crotch, she seems to think my bagel poem was an attempt at artistic redemption—instead of an attempt to guilt my wife into breaking out the fry pan and the potato peeler and making me an omelet.
Now, even bracketing the roughly 90-100 of these type poems I’ve posted on this site before my supposed stab at reaffirming my manhood (so distraught was I, the story goes, by be portrayed as a closeted Klansman dusted with powdered cheese food by a self-styled socialist), does anyone else not find it astonishing, from a purely clinical standpoint, that Marcotte can’t seem to consider anything—from laundry baskets to cats to posts on other sites that have nothing at all to do with her—outside the frame of some hangup about sexuality/masculinity/denial?
Perhaps Sadly, No! should do one of its patented “Adlerian” psychological misreadings on this very angry, very bitter, very very needy chick.
Me, I’ll just keep pumping out these poems whenever the mood strikes. Like, when I’ve just gotten done watching Rockford Files DVD, or when I really really really want a Spanish omelet.
What’s next, a fucking stamp?
Yeah, but where are the thumbnail reviews, Jeff? I want to know what the tequila thought. And the ‘dillo, natch.
Darleen, is it out oin the Internet?
Send likny thingy.
Thanks.
Also, what about the Coxlapping over at Pandagon? Just cuz I think it’s TEH (and I hardly ever capitalize when I type that).
“swp, sweetheart, it wasn’t a typo: you got it wrong. Like as dumb as screendoors on battleships or make like a tree and get the hell outta here”
JDM, you are just mean, attacking the noble troll that way. Don’t you know she spent all day on that ankle shtick. Just because she intended to use it for a spellig error, jumped the gun, and accidently used it for something different, doesn’t give you the right to trample her 1st ammendment rights!
monster!
It’s always teh spellig mit trollz, nein?
Dan – I hesitate to post this little gem from the same thread that Jeff made reference to above, from someone calling themselves MAJeff, but it captures the tone and tenor of the place wonderfully well:
Wow. The misogynist venom oozing from Goldstein’s brain is actually frightening.
You can feel the wave of hatred like heat emanating from his words.
Exactly. You know he would be out raping people if he thought he could get away with it (or maybe he has). And many (most?) of his followers likewise.
I think that renders the unique quality of character assassination, hyperbolic bloviation, and general bat-shit crazy shrieking that seems to be the norm at chez Pandagon.
Look – I know that the attraction of the Left for many today is probably more therapeutic in nature than ideological, but this sort of thing is completely beyond the pale.
A review of the Independence Day fireworks in Bristol, Vermont, 3 July 2006
Starting softly, as though sotto voce, they climaxed in a gorgeous ‘gasm of sound and light, drawing “oohs” and “ahs” from the crowd of (it must be said) mostly local toothless inbreds. Apart from the people at the gathering, many of whom likely sympathize with the US war effort and support Bush, it was in a certain wasteful and anti-intellectual fashion an almost awe-inspiriing spectacle.
I also have yet to see her address what someone actually wrote, she always does her translation or shorter schtick, then proceeds to argue with herself. Astonishing is a very good word for it.
>the attraction of the Left for many today<
I am honored by Tang, but I believe that that is called, in the vernacular, “beer goggles.”
Why I’m not a patriot:
http://theroguevoice.blogspot.com/2006/07/why-im-not-patriotic.html
Well-said, Dan.
Dan: A review of the Independence Day fireworks in Bristol, Vermont, 3 July 2006….. Apart from the people at the gathering, many of whom likely sympathize with the US war effort and support Bush,
Yikes, Dan. You don’t have your head buried that deep in the sand (where do you live, anyway?) that you think there are people in Vermont who sympathize with the occupation of Iraq and don’t want to vomit when they look at the dingbat in chief, do you?
YOU GUYS REALLY REALLY NEED TO GET OUT MORE – Leno, Letterman, Brokaw, Jennings – everyone is making fun of the shrub these days. You guys HAVE seen Stephen Colbert’s SKEWERING of King George the Moron, haven’t you?
http://debfrisch.com/archives/2006/05/stephen_colbert.html
And not well-said, Steve.
Wait – southwestpaw – Colbert did a bit mocking Bush?
When did this happen?
Because they’re all intellectual and moral giants, like Hannah Arendt, I presume. No, I don’t even OWN a pornograph.
Was this Stephen Colbert skewering of Bush broadcast on the television?
Because Tang is all about the T.V.
Ummm…Jennings is dead. Get out much?
Last I checked, late night TV is batting 1.000 on the White House Jokes since Jack Paar. Get out much?
“My ME”?
That’s pretty un-witty. But let me tell you what is REALLY fucked up: that Rumsfeld would let the terrorists know where a security camera is on his own driveway! Goddang it, that is un-American!
I say we all get together and find out where Rumsfeld lives and post the information on the internet so that people can bother him and disrupt his ability to work! And does he have children? Someone find out and figure out where they go to school so they can feel as UNSAFE as we all do!
Recipe: Skewered Bush
Take one Bush, and mince its words into tiny pieces (so tiny they can hardly be conned with an electron microscope). Alternate quotations from Kos, Armando, and misprisioned Hannah Arendt. Cover with fever swamp and marinate overnight. Add colbert to taste. Cook over very hot flame (please use renewable heat resource) for five minutes. Let knit for five minutes. Serve with condi riceaments of your choice. Bon appetit!
Ah, so you saying it was broadcast on the Food Network, Dan.
Why didn’t you say so, southwestpaw? Tang normally just watches the Rachael Ray and Alton Brown, plus reruns of Iron Chef.
George Bush is a piece of sh**
Cuntasleeza’s an ephed up twit.
Cheney’s just a fat old a**
Whores and pimps for the upper class!
Whaddya think – you like?
Needs a “Doo-Dah, Doo-Dah,” I think.
SWP, it has a good beat, and you can dance to it.
But as far as lyrical depth, it’s got nothing on The Archies.
“Cuntasleeza?”
Tang is shocked.
Fucking Rove.
Rachael Ray would never say something like “Cuntasleeza.”
She’s chipper. And perky.
What odd, selective, choices of self-censorship you’ve chosen. Telling. But not worth addressing, that’s for you to ponder, if you can.
I think this is ultimately the reason SWP decided to troll here.
Traffic is traffic, even if it’s from “undesirables”.