me: “Well, I dreamed I saw the knights In armor coming, saying something about a queen. There were peasants singing and drummers drumming and the archer split the tree. There was a fanfare blowing to the sun that was floating on the breeze. Look at Mother Nature on the run In the nineteen seventies –”
Klonopin: “– Dude, stop. You’re confusing me with your gravity bong and that Ziplock of Hawaii Skunk again.”
me: “Oh. Right.
me: “Sorry.”
Klonopin: “Whatever. But like I told you last time, I’m a hardcore prescription narcotic.1 Mistaking me with some lush island weed is like mistaking John Tesh for the Ramones.
“But hey, it’s your life, brother. Give me a holler when you’re ready to retire the haloofanator and the sandals and the hippie warbling and party with some real drugs. Because it ain’t like I’m going anywhere. Me and that pair of sleek pink Lady Bics your wife keeps in the medicine cabinet? We’re doing just fine together, thank you very much…”
****
1Technically, Klonopin is a benzodiazepine, not an opiate. But then, when you encounter a talking Klonopin regimen, you so enjoy the novelty of it that you tend not to mind when he exaggerates his own importance a bit.
And for what it’s worth? I have my doubts about his prowess with those Lady Bics, too.
Me: “Mistaking Johnny Cash for the Beltones? Come again?”
Bud Light after the Suns Win: “Wish I could hold a freakin’ candle to hardcore prescription drug, clonapin.”
Me: “Forget it.”
Me: “Even with overtime and Kobe’s elbows.”
Bud Light: “Quitchyerbitchin’. It’s not like it’s Sunday in Nogales at the San Regis with the matadors.”
Me: “Right. Sometimes I forget myself. Er, forget, myself. Sorry.”
Atlas shrugs.
One day, a Kennedy will call a cab.
Sweet Jaysus… it sounds like Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young singing Woodstock 1250…
Pablo  Give Kennedy a break, dammit, he was drinking to oppose Bush…
Hey, man! Psssst!
C’mon, man, we gotta get OUTTA here. The cops is raidin’ the joint, man, c’mon!
And the first cops on the scene were actually going to prosecute him for his brave dissent and truthiness-to-power-speak.
Thank goodness the private Kennedy police showed up in time to put a stop to this quashing of loyal dissent.
Great. Now I’ll waste all day trying to discern the “deeper meaning” and “hidden implications” and “unintended interpretations” and all the rest of that bullshit. Why does everybody’s account of their favorite halucination have to be analyzed for a test grade? You fuckin’ English teachers wear my ass out. Oooops. The bell just rang…..I’m gonna go see if I can find some Cliff notes on this shit.
Sen. Ted Kennedy has released the following to the press regarding the traffic accident in DC involving his son Patrick:
“Let every media outlet know, whether it wishes us well or ill, we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any relative, to assure the political survival and successful influence of our family.”
OMG. You don’t get titillated by your wife’s pink Lady Bics, do you? Maybe, the lovely Mrs. G. needs to cut back on the business trips.
Neil may still be tripping, but I bump into him at Sharks games every now and then. Polite guy. And yeah, I think he’s off his meds again.
– Altogether now:
“I’d rather be hunting with Cheney, than riding in a car with a Kennedy”
“Ich bein ein drunk driver!”
Friends don’t let Friends drive with the Kennedy’s.
Klonopin isn’t a narcotic, though- it’s a benzodiazepine, like valume. Only drugs in the opium family are narcotics. Don’t trust a drug that lies to you about its family, I say. It will likely start lying to you about its side-effects next!
I particularly like this bit from the “tolerance” crew:
”Genocidal ideation”? That’s good stuff!—though it’s really sad when somebody who fancies herself an analytic philosopher can’t recognize a straightforwardly pragmatic argument that posits we err on the side of whatever military action is most likely to shorten the war and save lives in the long run, even if our politicians or war lawyers fear immediate public perception (which is largely the result of viewing the world through what I’ve described as a logically incoherent social philosophy).
But that wasn’t really the point of my bringing up “Majikthise’s” post. Which was this: Lindsay “majikthise” Beyerstein: hot or not?
Me, I kind of like the ironic / blase sneer and the angst pirate affectation.
Or maybe she’s just sitting on cucumber.
Either way, the fact that she’s an analytical philosopher is just so damn sexy. And even if she turns out to be a total bitch (which, how likely is that), I could just close my eyes and imagine myself getting a dirty sanchez from Wittgenstein.
Lindsay is a little too “dykie” to be a hottie, IMHO. But her photo at her snarky blog site probably works for the guys who post comments there, or get off reading Maureen Dowd.
One question about Lindsay: Does the rug match the drapes?
How drunk am I?
It is an analytic truth that all philosophers are hot. Any alleged counter-examples show only that the one presenting the counter-example has not grasped the Form of Hotness. Especially if the alleged counter-example has anything to do with the picture on my website. The basis for this position is entirely objective and not in any way self-serving.
– Busy news day – Coming on the heels of the “bomb” over the wall announcement of the resignation of Porter Goss as head of the CIA, Patrick Kennedy announced in a news conference a few minutes ago that he is submitting himself to a drug abuse facility. He claims to have taken two different over the counter medicines prior to last nights auto accident at the Capital. No mention was made of his late night drinking at a local pub, already attested too by several eye witnesses and the bar maid that was serving him hammerheads all evening.
– The Chief of Capital police says that the situation was being handled properly by the police on the beat when they were suddenly “interrupted†from their normal process of field sobriety testing to determine Representative Kennedy’s condition, and told that they could leave it to their Supervisors, and Kennedy would be driven home. he said this is absolutely improper and the entire incident will be thouroughly investigated, and any charges against Kennedy for DUI will be applied.
– This whole thing stinks to high heaven of the fabled “Kennedy†form of justice as usual.
– Capital hill insiders say that many of the Democrat leaders were on the phone all day urging Kennedy to take the steps he did “for the good of the partyâ€Â, citing the embarrassment and problems it was causing the party at a time when they are squaking so loudly about the so called “culture of corruption†and poor leadership of Republicans. You gotta love the Dembulbs. Its all about “appearencesâ€Â, never mind substance.
“Good jobs for Philosophers, too!”
— Firesign Theatre
“Any More Rocket Fuel for You Hardhats?”
SB: thing
it’s my
You just can’t make this shit up.
Which was this: Lindsay “majikthise†Beyerstein: hot or not?
I believe the correct answer is: “In your chemical dreams, mate.”
Dude, you don’t get a <a href=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dirty_Sanchez_(sex)>Dirty Sanchez</a>, you give it. Unless you fancy Wittgenstein putting his dick in your ass and then smearing your own feces on your upper lip with his dick.
Which I guess is where Jeff was going with this.
Disgusting image, I know. Brain bleach!
Well, it is Wittgenstein…
What?
”…somewhere between Ronald Reagan and Jack Kerouac”
That’s a place where brain cells go to die. The “fastest man alive” is laughing his ass off while rolling over in his grave.
Praise cheeses, you delusional dolts have the shriveled cajones to attempt a slice & dice with Ms Beyerstein? (as though she’d waste her time, too much style and grace, i.e. class; to engage braindead latent light-in-the-loafers types such as yourselves would be intellectual bullying anyway. Better late than latent, macho men.)
Oh, btw, HOT.
[Light in the loafers? Hmm. Thought you progressives respected and supported teh Gay. I’m telling John Aravosis. And Jeff Gannon’s GAY PORN COCK OF LIES.
You’re on the road to being blackballed pal by the progressives, pal. And I ain’t talking Richard Roundtree playing Shaft on your face, either.]
Rev Dave,
Its nice to know that making fun of someone’s medical problems is what passes for “style and grace, i.e. class” on the left these days. It’s no wonder my wife is embarassed by her politics.
Just one quick note and I’m serious here. This has nothing to do with liberal versus conservative, just, what the fuck is your GP doing prescribing you klonopin?!?
If you legitimately need such a heavy-duty medication, you also need to follow up with both a psychiatrist (for the psychoactive meds) and a psychologist (for the behavioral and cognitive aspects) immediately.
Klonopin is no joke. None of the benzodiazepines are. I was on 2mg/day of klonopin a number of years ago, it was rough going and when I no longer needed it I had to take myself off of it over weeks, lowering the dose bit by bit. The reason I was able to get off of it, though, was the psych followup.
If you need klonopin, you need both a psychiatrist and a psychologist. Not, and I repeat not, a GP.
Hie thee hence.
The reason he put me on Klonopin is because it has a longer life than Ativan, which was the thing that worked best for me when I had sudden flare ups.
I don’t have panic disorder. I have General Anxiety Disorder. But much of that had was triggered by concerns over my heart (started, ironically, when my first bout of anxiety hit; i just happened to be working out at the time).
Since the stress echocardiagram came back perfect, I started doing far more cardio in addition to weights, pushups and crunches. And I bought a home blood pressure monitor to further put myself at ease.
My BP is on average between 110-115 /60-67, with my pulse at 55-67.
My GP told me that if I have a glass of wine or beer, to skip a dosage of the Klonopin. I’m now doing 1.5 mg a day. I have no side effects that I’ve noticed. And I’ve lost 25 lbs doing the 2-3 hours of cardio each day (stair stepping for an hour, 45 minute “walks” with my son—which consists of half walking, half running, with me pushing his stroller—another bit on the stair machine, etc).
I’m going to talk to my GP soon and have him phase me off Klonopin and go back on Ativan, as needed.
As for the Klonopin, I don’t crave it, and often find I’ve forgotten to take it. It’s only on days when I have minor symptoms (with me, a shallowness of breath) that I’m more cognizant about taking it on time. Anxiety attacks tend to come in clusters. But now that I’m convinced that’s all they are—and that I’m getting enough air and my heart is fine—I have my coping mechanism: I exercise a bit, and that relaxes me.
And all this is a reason to refrain from seeing a psychiatrist who has much more experience with the meds (both Klonopin and ativan) and a psychologist who has experience (which the GP lacks entirely) helping people deal with and overcome GAD?
Try this link for what appears to be a decent overview of the disorder along with recommended treatment regimens. Note that this does not involve treatment by a GP.
Look, GPs are good at basic internal medicine and if I have a strictly physical ailment that’s of course where I would go. But neurophysiological ailments are quite different, are much more complex and require training and experience that a GP just doesn’t have.
That said, it’s your choice and your funeral. You don’t sound like you’re particularly well informed, though, from the tone and content of your response. I’ll refrain from drawing any unwarranted conclusions and just point out that the professionals in the field recommend professional treatment. When it comes to GAD, a GP simply isn’t a professional in the field.
Do you want to get better or do you want to patch it over and pretend it has gone away?
Frank —
I assure you I am aware of all that you’ve mentioned. My first step was to go to a GP, who put me on Zoloft. The Klonopin is relatively recent, and as I say, I’m tapering it off.
My second step was to make sure that my heart and lungs are alright (my first echocardiogram showed mild pulmonary hypertension, but specific testing from a pulmonogist ruled that out).
My latest experience was a stress echocardiogram. Once I did fine on it, the chest pains I was having went away.
My next plan, should it be necessary, is to go to a psychiatrist—specifically because they are more knowledgeable about drug treatment.
But it may be the case that I don’t need it at all. So I’m waiting to see how the tapering off of the Klonopin goes.
Sigh. Any plan that doesn’t involve at least an evaluation by both a psychiatrist for the psychoactive meds (which includes Zoloft, by the way) and a psychologist for the behavioral, emotional and cognitive issues, well, isn’t a very good plan.
Oh, well, as I said, it’s your funeral.
Frank,
Panic attacks and GAD are real and they are debilitating. Many people can control them to a certain extent (or sometimes completely) with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), but not everybody can. Those people require meds.
Don’t make the assumption that there’s a psychological problem behind all mental illnesses. Indeed, most people who suffer from panic attacks or GAD had happy, normal childhoods. It’s just their brain chemicals that are out of whack. There’s very often a genetic link, too.
Most people who have severe, clinical panic attacks are very unlikely to get “hooked” on benzodiazepines, so if a doctor says that they will only prescribe low dose benzos for a short period of time, find another doctor. There are many, many people who have been on relatively high doses of benzos for decades without any problems.
See my article entitled Christianity and mental illness.
-Michael McCullough
Stingray: a blog for salty Christians
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