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Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance, abridged 24 (current events edition)

When one notices an unexpected leak, one should immediately endeavor to find the source of the leak and, while the problem is still relatively minor, correct it through aggressive means. 

Such action will prevent the engine or brakes from seizing up or failing completely (and the vehicle from pitching dangerously left or right, or breaking down entirely, in the worst cases), at which point you’ll be forced to embrace the ignominy of public transportation—the sudden explosive flatulence of your overweight seatmate’s hurriedly-eaten Taco Bell lunch a poor, fetid, municipally-managed substitute for crisp spring air blowing through your hair…

26 Replies to “Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance, abridged 24 (current events edition)”

  1. Gabriel Malor says:

    …through aggressive means.

    All your JOB are belong to us!

  2. Major John says:

    the sudden explosive flatulence of your overweight seatmate’s hurriedly-eaten Taco Bell lunch a poor, fetid, municipally-managed substitute for crisp spring air blowing through your hair…

    Great, cross Taco Bell off the list now.  Jeff, do you realize how very potent your wordsmithying is?

  3. Chrees says:

    With all this talk of leaks, I don’t know if we’re talking about the CIA or product-placement ads for Depends.

  4. rls says:

    When one notices an unexpected leak, one should immediately endeavor to find the source of the leak and, while the problem is still relatively minor, correct it through aggressive means.

    Different leaks need different remedies.  My auto AC compressor is being replaced right now.

    For my other leak – Depends takes care of it.

  5. natesnake says:

    I got back yesterday from a bachelor party at the family cabin.  I consumed BBQ ribs, shrimp bisque, eggs, home fries, jerky, one salmon egg (bait), beer, and bourbon.  I ripped a wet fart in the car that made two of the other four passengers gag.

    I was quite proud of my performance.

    T/W Actually, I make Taco Bell smell like a dozen roses.

  6. Lew Clark says:

    Emphasis on “unexpected leak”?  Because if it is an expected leak, you ignore it until the bike dies it’s timely death, send it to that great recycling site in the sky, and replace it with that bike you really wanted in the first place.

  7. actus says:

    Thank goodness for living somewhere competent enough to have good public transit.

  8. mojo says:

    As opposed to an expected leak, presumably.

  9. – Does Porter&Goss do brakes?

  10. Chrees says:

    Yes, unexpected leak. Like Olestra. Now with a new slogan: “Olestra–you’re sitting in it”

  11. Mark says:

    My auto AC compressor is being replaced right now.

    On the last car, when I got that estimate, I opened the windows instead, thus letting the hot air leak out instead of trying to tame it.

  12. MayBee says:

    Thank goodness for living somewhere competent enough to have good public transit.

    Oh please!  Try taking the Tokyo metro at 8:00 Sunday morning.  The beer farts of 100 passed-out strangers.

  13. Richard Pryor's hairstylist says:

    While aggressive steps to correct the problem should always be taken, attempting to fix a leaky oil sump with a soldering iron should pretty much always be Plan B…

  14. Ric Locke says:

    …replacing the leaking part is usually indicated, but may not solve the problem. A deeper fault may be increasing the pressure in the affected area, causing otherwise (that is, normally) sufficient sealing to be inadequate. Pay close attention to the possibility of blockage in concealed channels. In extreme cases, the entire system should be dismantled and soaked in a cleaning solution incorporating a strong base, preferably hot, to remove contamination deep within the structure. This treatment will, unfortunately, dull highly-polished surfaces. If appearance is important, polishing, rechroming, or (in the case of aluminum or other light-metal structures) electropolishing can be accomplished before reassembly.

    Of course, it may be cheaper to nuke it from orbit and buy a new one.

    Regards,

    Ric

  15. Karl Rove says:

    As a roadside fix, you can let the engine cool down and then stuff the leaking hole with as much Permatex as you can cram into it. In this case, I’d recommend the Ultra Grey, due to the torque involved in the leaking part.

    Don’t leave Langley without it.

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