Elizabeth: “Let me put it this way: sometimes its best to keep your most effective assets hidden from enemy eyes. And their ears, too—if your enemies happen to be creepy little fetishists like David Spade.
“Which, there’s a night I’d rather not revisit, if it’s all the same to you…”*
****
(h/t Eric Akawie)
The really fun part is pulling the tape off, y’know.
SB: because
of the erectile tissue!
I am going to write my Congressional Rep and ask that legislation be introduced to make Ms. Elizabeth’s nipples statutory members of the NSC. Now.
She has a little bit of “horse teeth” going on there, but who am I fooling? As soon as the 15th of April rolls around that restraining order will be off and I’ll be right back outside her bedroom window.
The web-nanny won’t let me look. Can someone give me a blow by blow description of what I’m missing?
To Sticky B:
Picture of cute girl with wispy shirt, transparent enough to see the flesh-colored tape covering her nipples.
I have never been jealous of flesh-colored tape before.
Anony – I had not, up to this point, either.
Is there a particular brand of tape that works best?
C’mon ladies. What’s the scoop?
It’s all fun and games until some poor ambassador gets his head blown off during a Brumski with a harlot whose taped her nipples with C4.
[L]iberty cannot be preserved without a general knowledge among the people, who have a right … to knowledge … and a desire to know; but besides this, they have a right, an indisputable, unalienable, indefeasible, divine right to that most dreaded and envied kind of knowledge, I mean, of the characters and conduct of their rulers. Rulers are no more than attorneys, agents, and trustees for the people; and if the cause, the interest and trust, is insidiously betrayed, or wantonly trifled away, the people have a right to revoke the authority that they themselves have deputed, and to constitute abler and better agents, attorneys, and trustees …
The stale, impudent insinuations of slander and sedition, with which the gormandizers of power have endeavored to discredit your paper, are so much the more to your honor; for the jaws of power are always opened to devour, and her arm is always stretched out, if possible, to destroy the freedom of thinking, speaking, and writing.
And if the public interest, liberty, and happiness have been in danger from the ambition or avarice of any great man, whatever may be his politeness, address, learning, ingenuity, and, in other respects, integrity and humanity, you have done yourselves honor and your country service by publishing and pointing out that avarice and ambition. These vices are so much the more dangerous and pernicious for the virtues with which they may be accompanied in the same character, and with so much the more watchful jealousy to be guarded against.
“Curse on such virtues, they’ve undone their country.”
Be not intimidated, therefore, by any terrors, from publishing with the utmost freedom, whatever can be warranted by the laws of your country; nor suffer yourselves to be wheedled out of your liberty by any pretences of politeness, delicacy, or decency. These, as they are often used, are but three different names for hypocrisy, chicanery, and cowardice.
So you’re saying you tape your nipples Prozacula?
yes!
Your stock just went through the roof!!
Interesting story, I was the victim of a terribly botched nipple-replacement surgery. They replaced the wrong two.
Cheers.
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