We’re off here in a bit to the birthday party for our friends’ little girl, who turns 2-years-old today. Unfortunately, we’re in a bit of a rush, given that we’re going to have to pick up a new present and wrap it in the car on the way.
Seems the “Tickle Me Elmo” doll I bought off of eBay was actually something called a “Tickle My Elmo”—which essentially is a nylon thong with a fuzzy red sleeve for the male member that’s been festooned with smooth plastic eyes and the randy grin of a horny muppet.
I tried to convince my wife that we could pass it off either as a fake nose or a strap on sock puppet, but she wasn’t biting—whether out of a lack of imagination or an abundance of decorum. Either way, we need to do some quick recovery shopping.
So, y’know, that kinda sucks.
Don’t give the trolls ideas.
Good thing she wasn’t biting. I hate teeth when used in… oh, you’re talking about something else. Nevermind.
You should file an NPS report at ebay and do a chargeback…
…damn, I spend too much time on eBay, don’t I?
Enjoy the party!
Well, maybe I’ll just keep it for myself. As a sockpuppet, I mean.
Because it is kinda cute.
Dude, we love you. We really love you.
But please, please don’t post video!
Jeff –
Future reference: Timbuk Toys (over at U-Hills) does free, fast wrapping on the spot; and they have a good mix of cool stuff plus quasi-educational crap (for “those” kind of parents). Seriously, I just leave 15 minutes early for the party and they get it done, cheap-ish.
OT: It looks like actus and the rest of the “civil war” cheerleaders are going to be disappointed, yet again:
That really sucks.
TW: A perfectly good civil war, shot to hell.
Could I have the “Tickle my Elmo”?
TomB, dude! WTF? Verifiable facts that don’t support the leftie We Finally Have An Iraq Civil War! theme? Whatcha doing, man? Trying to confoozle actus and his fellow leftards?
Seriously, guy! You’ll have them running in circles screaming “Halliburton! Chickenhawk! No blood for oil!”, and probably forgetting to take their lithium boosters. Next thing you know, they get an ambulance ride, and they’ll be blaming you.
Keep up the good work!
TW: Rocket science this ain’t.
How does one accomplish that which has already happened?
Two words:
impossible.
Wait, that’s four.
Never mind.
See, you have me doing it now….
My husband got one of those. Did nothing for me.
Did you check the batteries?
Her husband has batteries?
I’m rechargeable, hence the bolts in my neck.
Call me a SoCon, but two is too young for a strap-on.
So YOU’RE my buyer! Congrats! I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
Let’s not forget this memorable clip.
Does your wife read this blog?
I think we have to assume she’s used to it by now.
If you get the real “Tickle Me Elmo†doll, you might want to check it first by giving it two test tickles.
All right, Beto, I knew what I was probably in for and hence didn’t click on your link until my kids were out of the room….
…but you could’ve warned me to swallow the dang Diet Coke first.