Air Supply: “I’m lying alone with my head on the phone / Thinking of you till it hurts. / I know you hurt too but what else can we do / Tormented and torn apart? / I wish I could carry your smile in my heart / For times when my life feels so low. / It would make me believe what tomorrow could bring / When today doesn’t really know, doesn’t really –”
protein wisdom: “– SHUT THE FUCK UP already, would you please? Jesus! It’s like I can feel my balls being slowly snipped off with each unmanly high note you two permed cupcakes let slip from your disarmingly lipglossed poptreacle suckholes.”
Did nothing? Surely you jest. Air Supply deserves every ounce of scorn and vitroil that can be heaped upon them for making certain that every man who lived during the early 80’s had to be a total wuss to get into a woman’s pants. The fact that I was only in elementary school at the time and still new this to be true only reinforces this fundamental truth.
Preposterously gay.
You’re all out of love, Toby. Say it. It’s okay. You’re among friends here…
Air Supply may not have done anything that called for such a response, but certainly Wham! did.
So, I just do a mental substitution. Which, I might mention, is really painful – having to remember Wham! for any reason whatsoever, I mean.
Which, I might mention, is really painful – having to remember Wham! for any reason whatsoever, I mean.
Yes, Russ. Thanks for calling them to mind. Appreciate that. Needed THAT set of melodic lines to haunt my dreams tonight.
TW: It “figures”.
disarmingly lipglossed poptreacle suckholes
It is now my mission in life to use that phrase in casual conversation.
Preferably with my boss.
When today doesn’t really know…
Truly one of the top 100 worst lines in pop music history. Ranks right up there with “alligator lizards in the air…”
Oh I violently disagree, Air Supply deserves all the opprobrium you can heap on them.
The only thing good about their songs was when you re-wrote them into something less lame.
I’m all out of drugs, I’m so straight without them, I know they were there, waiting for so long,I’m all out of drugs, what am I without them, it can’t be too late to go out and then to scooore
Alright!
Yes – demolish Air Supply! Pass legislation making the internalization of more than two Air Supply “songs” a felony!
Next, work on dismantling Kanye “I am apparently Jesus” West!
“aggrevated?” Is that some bizarre bastard offspring of “aggrieved” and “aggravated?” I vote for “aggrieviated.”
Well, tomorrow never knows.
Or so John Lennon told me once.
As for “alligator lizards in the air,” that’s not so unlikely. All it takes is knowing where there’s a lot of the little biters, and a couple sticks of dynamite.
Russ has hit it on the head. While your trumped-up neocon warmongering against Air Supply has bogged us down in a quagmire and cost us all our allies, Wham! is getting away unmolested and laughing at us.
A Fatwah against Wham!
I’m with the Good Lt. on the motion to dismantle, derail and defenestrate the disgraceful Mr. Kayne West.
Hmmm.
OMG! I just found another cartoon that depicts the Prophet Mohammed at the battle of Medina!
The Prophet Mohammed
Oh the humanity!
While we’re (sort of) on the subject… did anyone ever notice that you could sing pretty much all of Rick Astley’s “Never Gonna Give You Up” to the music from Rick Astley’s “Together Forever” and vice versa? They’re even in the same key (as well as on the same album, separated by only one track). Now that’s efficiency.
TW: Help! I need somebody…
When I was young I assumed that the singer for Air Supply was female.
On my very first date ever, I took a girl to an Air Supply concert because she really, really liked them. In other words, these evil scumsucks got me started down the Kafkaesque path of emasculating myself in order to get into a girl’s knickers. They must be hunted down and made to pay for their crimes, along with that drive-by castrato Christopher Cross. Air Supply=Borman, Cross=Mengele.
T/W: “mean.” Nope, just calling it as I see it.
Let it be known that although I liked to sing along with Air Supply when I was in jr. high (probably because they sang in my range, and did fun things like that holding-a-note-forever shtick, such that if I’d been a jr. high kid in Mariah Carey’s time I would’ve been trying that whole really-high-yodeling trick she likes to perform whether or not it’s germane to the song), I would’ve joined a convent on the spot before dating a guy who actually sang like that, or aspired to.
TW: Groups like Air Supply never die; they just morph into the music of the spheres. Like when Yes did that “Song for Harmonic Convergence” thing. It’s why the universe is so messed up.
It seems like I read somewhere that a couple of the original members of Air Supply are now the driving force behind Pantera.
Or maybe not.
Did I see these guys in concert like … oh, maybe a quarter of a century ago?
Crap. You know, I probably could have tolerated the existence-if not the music–of Air Supply, if they hadn’t seemingly influenced other previously halfway decent bands like REO Speedwagon to start recording sappy ballads. I mean, really, contrast 157 Riverside Ave with I Can’t Fight This Feeling and I think you’ll see my point. Fuckers.
What was it with the early to mid-80s and seriously sappy music, anyway? Post-Carter hangover? Something to do with the questionable masculinity of Jon Cryer’s and Andrew McCarthy’s characters in contemporary teen movies? I wish I knew.
TW: Yes, I could have done wihout Air Supply entirely. So bring on the headless horses, ‘cause Bela Lugosi’s dead, my friends.
Yeah, that should have been without. PIMF.
But at least I spelled it correctly in the little Turing box.
When I heard it was Brad Pitt’s idea to sing “Making Love Out Of Nothing At All” in Mr. & Mrs. Smith, the whole Brangelina thing fell totally into place.
I never noticed that, Jamie, but I have noticed this is true of “Crazy” and “Amazing” by Aerosmith.
Good point Earthling. I never put 2 and 2 together like that. I just assumed that Gary Richrath and Neil Dougherty were chemically castrated somewhere around about 1980. REO kicked some major ass until they got famous.
When I was young I assumed that the singer for Air Supply was female.
As did the guitarist.
Backstage pass anyone?
Funniest thing I’ve ever seen, ed. Now go burn in eternity.
tw: Along with England.
I always blamed the descent into suckitude of rockin bands like REO on f’n Journey. They all saw that little puss Stevie Perry raking in huge amounts of dough for acting like a girl. Journey, crime against music, crime against nature.
You’re right Earthling & Sticky, I saw REO when they were still doing clubs in StL. They surely did rock.
I’ve “needed” to get that off my chest for years.
Criminy, SeanM, you’re right! I must now go cry in my cabernet for a while. Because Steven Tyler singing “Angel” – well, OK, it’s a cruddy “luuuuvv ballad” and all, but oh the vocals… Mick Jagger can’t do that. Nor Geddy Lee, though I harbor much admiration for the Thinking (Wo)man’s Canadian Power Trio.
Along the same lines: I hate when Alanis Morrisette plays harmonica. Suck-blow, suck-blow, as a former Seattle DJ said once, only about Tom Petty… It makes me rush home to turn on Blues Traveler to sanitize my ears.
TW: This whole discussion has elements of high school about it.