Chianti: “You tawdry, godbothering Americans—all you do is stuff your faces and hate brown people. And stink like cheese puffs.*
“Honestly, it’s a miracle you can live with yourselves. Now please—leave my sight before I’m forced to use violent and unpleasant hand gestures to vigorously insult you.”
A cheeky vintage with old world character. Does not have good legs or else it would be kicking your backside all the way to the cellar.
(burp)
Nice body, but a little mouthy…
You’d never get that kind of lip from Mogan David.
My New York State Chard thinks them’s fightin’ words.
That’s why us AmeriKKKans prefer the sweet, sweet taste of Boone’s Farm – you can change the flavor without feeling any trace of remorse, and the only thing it says is “try another, sugar!”
And it also drives much better than those uptight Italian wines.
How brown do you have to be to really qualify as brown? I know I am safe in the winter, but every summer I get to hating myself a little bit, I think because of the tan. And you can always trust Paisano, bro.
tw: girl-> just decant into a nice carafe, she will never know^^
It’s getting harder to tell the difference between sites like that one and this one…
http://iraqwarwrong.blogspot.com/
Well the difference is obvious, the Iraq War is Wrong Blog is fucking funny!
Well, if you have to ask, it’s a safe bet that we already hate you.
Heh.
You know…in my experience a glass of, say, Brunello di Montalcino or, to beg the obvious, any Super Tuscan would have been less antagonistic. Perhaps even a bit…insouciant.
Well, if you have to ask, it’s a safe bet that we already hate you.
That’s priceless, man. F’n priceless.
Jeff, just unleash a couple of hooligan bottles of Newcastle Brown Ale… that’ll be the last guff you get from that snotty Chianti.
How embarrassing. I actually had cheese puffs for dinner. I mean, only cheese puffs. But I’m having a nice cognac now, so…
TW: This is the life.
My American Children,
Your latest propaganda shibboleth, “eliminationist,” sits oddly on the page/screen/tongueâ€â€too many tall, skinny letters, and an odd, spitty, Sylvester The Cat-ish mis-resonance with the “rhetoric” it usually modifiesâ€â€so your growing campaign of repetition feels unnatural, un-“meme”-like (as our people say today).
Everyone has already spotted you experimentally passing the word back and forth amongst yourselves, and while you may have succeeded in deceiving yourselves into believing that such a thing exists outside your own language (good start), “eliminationism” hasn’t even made it into the Times yet!
This is going nowhere. Back to the woodshed.
XOX,
Zombie Goebbels
PS: Sure, Cathy Young has been fooled, but she is compelled to be “fair,” to be loved, and her shame makes her an easy target. No one else outside the Party is buying.
Next!
Chianti is a pussy.
A good, dark lager is the drink of real men.
All righty, then.
We are “big tent” kinds of people. Jeff drinks Chianti and is, therefore, obviously gay. But we are very inclusive and will let him stay. That and the fact it’s his blog.
Not to mention, Lew, the fact that Jeff’s not especially swarthy.
Mogen David doesn’t give you any lip…it just kicks your ass. There’s a reason its nickname is Maddog.
Now, THIS is funny.
You’re getting this kind of lip from Chianti Ruffino fucking Classico?! Just what does she fancy herself to be? She looks great in that lasagna getup, but still…
Cheap little Italian whore.
Just for that, I’d put on my NASCAR cap and drink her out of a Dixie cup while watching “Birth of a Nation.”
See, there’s your problem, you always buy either the Brolio chianti, if you have some cash, or the chianti with the wicker around the bottle. Ruffino wants to be Brolio but isn’t so it’s a bit surly.
Sean M, thanks for the hearty laugh at 7am. That was hysterical.
Now go, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Hey, it needed to be said.
Kelly: Great call re: Brunello &/or the super Tuscans.
Those are the best kind.
Oh wait, we’re talking wine, ren’t we?
Never age the chianti too long. It’ll turn brown on the edges and that can’t be good, right?
Hey.
I DO NOT hate brown people.
That Sophia Loren, she tanned up REAL nice.
And them Hawaiian Tropic girls!
You rock, JC’s General!! That was even funnier than Scott Adams. I laughed so hard I sprayed Annie Greensprings all over the monitor, and had to call one of my brown-skinned domestics to clean it up.
I do not see color, only breasts.
You know, natesnake, I used to have that same problem, but then I developed a keen taste for ass.
Since, you know, that’s the part you see when the hottie you’ve been chatting up walks away from you.
TW: </i>gone.</i> Damn, that thing IS good.
And stink like cheese puffs.
Bigoted wine! Why, some of my best friends are cheese puffs!
Everyone knows you eat Doritos with Ruffino…