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This can’t be real … even for hipsters … [Darleen Click]

glitterbeards

Just.Say.No.

You can do some pretty cool things with a big, badass beard.

Since the lumbersexual trend took over, we’ve seen everything from flower-clad facial hair and rainbow-colored scruff to beards covered in little Christmas ornaments.

If you’ve been getting into the holiday spirit by hanging beard baubles all over your face, you should know those dull decorations aren’t the only ways you can make a seasonal style statement.

Apparently, “glitter beards” are now a real thing and these brilliant bristles might just be the best thing that has ever happened in the history of hipster beards.

13 Replies to “This can’t be real … even for hipsters … [Darleen Click]”

  1. happyfeet says:

    the guy on the right pulls it off

    the guy on the left looks like that guy from frasier

    with a glitter beard

  2. cranky-d says:

    These are a thing in the sense that a few jackasses did it. I really cannot see this as actually happening in any significant manner.

    It would be much more likely to see a few tiny Christmas ornaments added for a holiday party.

  3. McGehee says:

    “Lumbersexual,” what a joke. If having a beard makes one a lumberjack, then having eyebrows makes me Andy Rooney.

  4. Mr. Saturn says:

    I’m glad my beard isn’t a hipster beard. I’d never cover it’s natural beauty with such crap.

  5. cranky-d says:

    Having a beard makes me look at least 10 years older, as it is pretty much white with a smattering of gray.

  6. McGehee says:

    I condemn the shameless cultural appropriators who grow large beards for ornamentation rather than to keep their chins warm, or to hide disfiguring scars, or simply because they’re sick and tired of shaving.

  7. […] Wisdom has news of “glitter beards” for douchebags only of course There are actual photos here, God help […]

  8. Dana says:

    Mr McGehee wrote:

    I condemn the shameless cultural appropriators who grow large beards for ornamentation rather than to keep their chins warm, or to hide disfiguring scars, or simply because they’re sick and tired of shaving.

    The “lumbersexuals” were the twinks who wore the wispy goatees — usually not Van Dykes! — a few years ago, and realized that real women realized that they were all twinks, so they grew full beards, and started to grow them longer, as though that would fool anyone.

    Those of us who have worn full beards for the last 44 years, but who understood that you keep them trimmed, laugh at the “lumbersexuals.” Please let me know when one of them has actually gotten his hands dirty doing some real work.

    Trace Adkins explained the kind of men women actually want.

  9. If you notice, the kind of beards Lumbersexuals wear all look like fake comic beards.

    I’ve gone for the Shermanesque beard – a little scraggly.

    http://georgiainfo.galileo.usg.edu/gastudiesimages/William%20T.%20Sherman%204.jpg

    The best part of the beard and white hair [and, for once, my girth] is that ladies love to sit on my lap every December. Hey. Now.

  10. McGehee says:

    If you notice, the kind of beards Lumbersexuals wear all look like fake comic beards.

    A big beard paired with a waxed mustache tends to give that effect. I haven’t used mustache wax in years, beard or not.

  11. I’m sure you looked just dapper, McGehee.

  12. Blake says:

    I see McGehee made one of his sly historical references.

    Alexander may have been a bit on the vain side, however, he did rule the world for a bit.

    I once tried growing a goatee. I should have known better. The beard challenged should just accept their limitations.

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