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2015 Darwin nominee “blank the alligators” [Darleen Click] UPDATED

Talk about famous last words

Investigators, a w.itness and friends are revealing the harrowing accounts of the first recorded fatal alligator attack in Texas and more about the victim.

A justice of the peace tells KFDM News Tommie Woodward, 28, is from St. Louis, but moved to Orange with his twin brother. He’s worked in the shipyards the past few years.

“One minute he’s there and then the next minute he’s gone,” Michelle Wright said.

What started as a night of fun at Burkhart’s Marina in Orange ended with the fatal attack early Friday morning.

“I asked him please do not go swimming, there’s a bigger alligator out here, just please stay out of the water,” Wright, an employee at the restaurant, said.

Workers report they spotted a ten-foot gator in the waters of Adams Bayou this week, prompting them to post a warning sign reading “No Swimming Alligators.”

Investigators said Woodward didn’t pay attention to the posted warnings and pleas from Wright.

“He said blank the alligators and thereupon jumped into the water,” Orange County Justice of the Peace Rodney Price said.

Price said the 28-year old was almost immediately attacked

*********************************************
UPDATE

I don’t believe the word “accident” quite fits

A 22-year-old man died on Saturday night in Maine as a result of a fireworks accident on the Fourth of July, officials said.

Devon Staples, 22, was killed instantly in Calais, Maine, after he put a fireworks mortar on his head, marking the first death since the state legalized fireworks two years ago, NBC-affiliate WCSH6 reports. Staples had been drinking with friends when the incident occurred at approximately 10 p.m. ET, according to Maine Public Safety spokesperson Steve McCausland.

8 Replies to “2015 Darwin nominee “blank the alligators” [Darleen Click] UPDATED”

  1. bgbear says:

    Amazing he made it to 28.

  2. LBascom says:

    I’m wondering if the gator got a little buzzed like when you eat a jello shot.

  3. Proof that Nemesis afflicts all types of Hubris: the Big and the Small, the Smart and the F–kin’ Stupid – she don’t care.

  4. cranky-d says:

    The fact that he didn’t know he was committing suicide was the accident. Anything else stretches credulity too far.

  5. dicentra says:

    No Swimming Alligators.

    And there’s your problem. Swimming alligators were prohibited, and the man clearly was not an alligator, swimming or otherwise.

    Commas save lives.

    Then from 1909: “THE FOURTH’S VICTIMS. Dead in the United States– 215 killed by fireworks, celebratory firearms, gunpowder, toy pistols.”

    Not a one of those deadly accidents caused by something available today. No doubt people shooting real ammo into the air, homemade firecrackers, and other lethal, badly made exploding devices.

  6. Thank Gaia, Di, that we’re not as free and at liberty today as we were back in those dark and dangerous days!

    [I must admit: I’m surprised TR let this happen.]

  7. Ernst Schreiber says:

    In fairness to TR, he was at the beginning of the era of Gentlemen, we can repair them. We have the technique (and managerial expertise)!. So his vision of what was possible was more limited.

    Yeah, I know, the way Oscar Goldman says it is cooler.

  8. Well, Ernst…intelligence wise, TR was quite limited, so I agree with your point.

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