John Hawkins has compiled his choices for “The 40 Most Obnoxious Quotes For 2005”. I’ve plucked from the list two I believe deserve a pointed juxtaposition:
“I’d like to say to the good citizens of Dover: if there is a disaster in your area, don’t turn to God, you just rejected Him from your city. And don’t wonder why He hasn’t helped you when problems begin, if they begin. I’m not saying they will, but if they do, just remember, you just voted God out of your city. And if that’s the case, don’t ask for His help because He might not be there.”
—Pat Robertson, after the citizens of Dover voted against school board members who favored teaching intelligent design
And:
“We are a nation that is unenlightened because of religion. I do believe that. I think that religion stops people from thinking. I think it justifies crazies. I think flying planes into a building was a faith-based initiative. I think religion is a neurological disorder. If you look at it logically, it’s something that was drilled into your head when you were a small child. It certainly was drilled into mine at that age. And you really can’t be responsible when you are a kid for what adults put into your head.”
(h/t Castle Arghhh!)
SEXIST!
BECAUSE OF THE RELIGIOSITY!
Well, obviously I’m gonna have to work harder to make the cut next year.
I can’t decide which of these guys I’d rather have dinner with.
I actually thought Maher’s “Faith-based initiative” quip was rather clever.
Does that make me a bad person? I’m assuming it does. Just looking for confirmation.
33) “The day Dick Cheney is going to run for president, I’ll kill myself. All we need is one more liar.”—Helen Thomas
She’s not already dead?
I believe the term is “undead,” alpuccino.
Well if an “undead” can kill itself, I say, DICK CHENEY FOR PRESIDENT!!!
« …you really can’t be responsible when you are a kid for what adults put into your head… »
Frankly, comrade Goldsteinovski I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that the Manchu/Carlyle Group is behind that latest Neocon Evangelical Dixie conspiracy
And no wonder that secretive private equity group is named after a famous 19th century Islamofascist Scottish philosopher: Carlyle actually wrote “Muhammad, the Hero as a Prophet†[sic] in 1841, precisely 160 years before George W. Bush was elected which “coincided†by fortuity with the seventh eclipse of Jupiter vis-à-vis the third column of the Ross-Lyn chapel!
Also ever wondered why Dick Cheney’s wife is named Lyn and Dubya’s mother-in-law Rosa which literally means “Ros(s)e†in ancient Aramaic Mexican??
By Yahweh’s grace, the scales are finally falling from my eyes and I am now seeing the depths of how far our nation has fallen under that wicked administration.
Thank you my Lord!
Long live the Very Reverend Robertson!
Long live the holy doctrine of Creationism!
And “Vult dei sanctus animus†as my Celtic templar friends used to say…
I don’t think they’re opposites at all. They’re both pompous asshats making asinine religious assertions. They’re both such self-important fuckheads that they’re certain of all people alive they know the nature of God and should belittle those who see things differently. How much more similar can you get?
In other words, send those Jesuslanders to the gas chambers!
We will accept nothing less.
This is my favorite:
Kerry is not slamming the troops here. He’s just saying that Iraqi troops should be terrorizing their own people instead of Americans doing it.
Ummm, Doc V.,
You should stop when the Q-Tip meets resistance, not when you can pull it out the other ear.
Bill Maher: Future inductee into the Most Undeserving of Having a Television Show Hall of Fame. (Founding members: Roseanne Barr, Bill O’Reilly, Chris Matthews, and Margaret Cho.)
I cringe whenever ANYone quotes Robertson, especially when it is intimated that he, of all people, has a grasp on what Christianity is about. Maher’s comment is just as absurd, just as ignorant. So I guess, yeah, the juxtaposition is warranted.
TW: problems
As in, both of those guys have serious…
Oh, me! Oh,me!! I get the connection!! Nobody listens to either one of them. Am I right? Do I get the prize?
sw: “thirty” – Is it thirty pieces of silver?
It does make you a bad person, Beck. I can confirm.
(j/k)
I do find Mahr’s remark a bit more offensive than Robertson’s stupid prattle. To equate Bush’s attempt to allow religious-based organization’s greater involvement in government’s anti-poverty efforts with terrorism is not just the stupid prattle we get so much of from Maher but offensive. And a rather egregious example, even if Maher thought he was being funny, of the “Bush is a terrorist too” sloganeering.
Yep. Bush giving some government funds to the Salvation Army to aid the poor is terrorism. Got it.
good stuff. the buchanan quote is pretty great too.
Maher is an asshole but he’s right about this. I don’t have to believe in the Easter Bunny to know that chocolate tastes good.
What Ho! Dr. de la Vega.
Stand ready and prepare to feel my hot knife of truth as I hack your limp blood sausage of lies into equal-sized discs suitable for jumbalaya.
19th century Islamofascist Scottish philosopher: Carlyle actually wrote “Muhammad, the Hero as a Prophet†[sic] in 1841
True enough of the face of it for any 2nd year haggis factory intern to uncover, but someone of your “letters” can hardly ignore the nugget of treasure that lies at the bottom of this tree.
Catherine Conn the great-great-neice of the Muhammad author was the only panelist to appear on every version of TTTT from 1956-2002. Now follow me if you can uncup your bishop for 15 seconds and learn that she got her start at the Bucks County Playhouse in New Hope, Pennsylvania. The playhouse, once a grist mill (dating from the 1700s) was instrumental in turning the town into an arts center, way back when.
grist mill? I know you know where I’m going with this.
Getting your finger out of your nose and peeling one more layer from the onion, you’ll find that currently Kitty Carlisle is performing her one-woman cabaret act at Feinstein’s at the Regency in New York City, in celebration of her 95th birthday.
Kitty?
Feinstein’s?
Game, set and match, sir.
That sting you feel is the sting of pain.
Get used to it.
SeanH nails it hard.
Two men, two quotes, two religious zealots high on their own certitude.
;peter
“If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.”
— Zen Proverb
SB: seen
but not understood
Robertson vs. Maher.
Death Match 2005.
Winner gets a one-way ticket to the moon.
TW: forces. The forces of good will win out and rid our planet of Idiotarians.
DEIPHOBE!
NukemHill wins!
I liked Gillian Anderson (former hottie, now danger to herself and others) with her “There is no free speech in America” speech.
How much heroin do you figure it took to come to that conclusion?
I wish she would shut up about not being able to speak.
Moby and Pat Buchanan are perennial favorites for dumb statements. But the list is so full of ghems, how do you choose?
Veggie, I think that’s just dandruff.
And really, you’re straying dangerously close to Calypso Louie territory here.
Not that it bothers me, mind you. It’s just that the NOI is terribly possessive of their idiocy.
“Maher is an asshole but he’s right about this. I don’t have to believe in the Easter Bunny to know that chocolate tastes good.”
Maher’s a condescending prick and of course he also happens to be very wrong. He thinks he’s the “snark king”, but he’s not even good at it.
The question I’d ask this clown if given a chance is how can a people so “unenlightened” as Americans have most of the greatest seats of learning and possess more patents than any country on Earth? Most number of Nobel Prize winner? Once again those CRAZY, unenlightened Americans.
Oh and that whole “religion stops people from thinking”?
Where does this idiot think places like Harvard came from?
Oh, that’s right…helped by the donations of a minister that bequethed half his estate and his personal library to its early founding. I guess he did that so everyone would stay “unenlightened”.
What about Princeton? Founded by Evangelical Christians.
Wake Forest? Baptists.
Georgetown University? Catholics.
Etc., etc., etc….
(Editors’ note: I will not–I cannot–gild this lily.)
« …you really can’t be responsible when you are a kid for what adults put into your head… »
Frankly, comrade Goldsteinovski I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that the Manchu/Carlyle Group is behind that latest Neocon Evangelical Dixie conspiracy
And no wonder that secretive private equity group is named after a famous 19th century Islamofascist Scottish philosopher: Carlyle actually wrote “Muhammad, the Hero as a Prophet†[sic] in 1841, precisely 160 years before George W. Bush was elected which “coincided†by fortuity with the seventh eclipse of Jupiter vis-à-vis the third column of the Ross-Lyn chapel!
Also ever wondered why Dick Cheney’s wife is named Lyn and Dubya’s mother-in-law Rosa which literally means “Ros(s)e†in ancient Aramaic Mexican??
By Yahweh’s grace, the scales are finally falling from my eyes and I am now seeing the depths of how far our nation has fallen under that wicked administration.
Thank you my Lord!
Long live the Very Reverend Robertson!
Long live the holy doctrine of Creationism!
And “Vult dei sanctus animus†as my Celtic templar friends used to say…
R. Mutt
Bill Maher makes me so bad I could spit. That Robertson quote is pretty bad on the other end of the spectrum.
Dear God,
Thanks for the opiate.
Love,
The Masses.
I believe the phrase is “Jumped the Shark.” As in those two have jumped the shark.
The thing that irks me, though, is that Mahar can say all kinds of hateful things about religion, but the faithful can’t say anything in their defense without being accused of bigotry.
What’s the problem? It seems obvious that Robertson proved Maher right.
Bill Maher, he’s an intellectual, right?