Me: “In my day, it was all Pixie Stix and Smarties. And Sugar Daddys. Lots of Sugar Daddys.”
Ghost of Halloweens past: “I remember.”
Me: “Now it’s all like, bite-sized Twix bars.”
Ghost of Halloweens past: “Yup.”
Me: “Bite-sized. What’s that all about?”
Ghost of Halloweens past:
Me: “Man. I do so miss Sugar Daddys.”
Ghost of Halloweens past: “Stop it, would you? You’re gonna make me cry.”
Don’t forget the stories of razor blades in candy bars or in apples.
Or breathing through a hot, steamy vinyl mask long enough to kill brain cells.
Good times.
Martha did the razor blade in the apple last year. But so far as I know, she’s the only one who’s ever really pulled it off.
Hershey. Plain. Almonds. Full-size.
GHP: What about that lady?
Which lady?
GHP: The lady that handed out sandwich bags full of unsalted, unbuttered, homemade popcorn.
Oh, her.
GHP: Which came first, the popcorn or the merciless trashing of her house on mischief night?
Don’t remember, don’t care.
For the record, I gave out Butterfingers and Milky Ways. They were well received.
There were hardly any trick-or-treaters in our neighborhood this year.
What the hell is going on when you have trouble giving away free candy?
I loved Sugar Daddies, right up until that fateful Halloween when I bit down on one and chewed … and pulled a filling right out of my tooth. The pain was so bad, I could barely finish eating the rest of my candy.
Yeah. Good times.
BECAUSE OF THE CANDIES THAT VIOLATE CHILD PROTECTION LAWS!
Can we get an opinion Scalito?
I miss homemade caramel popcorn balls and candy apples. Damned sickos with their razor blades and needles ruined everything.
It must be a conspiracy hatched by Mars and Hersheys to force us all to buy their pre-packaged bites of chocolate-flavored, sugar-coated crack.
Bah, I think candybars, whatever size, are way better then Pixie Sticks and the rest of that junk with NO CHOCOLATE.
What, no Big Hunk? Or candy corn?
Come on, Amber, Pixie Stix were kiddy cocaine. Mainline four or five of them and you’d be bouncing off the walls all night.
For the record, in five years in our present house we’ve had exactly zero trick or treaters. My wife is starting to get suspicious about my copious candy purchases.
C’mon, man! You’re an adult!
Haul your butt down to the 7-11 and buy all the candy you want.
My fav was Swee-tarts. So many in one package.
Candy is bad for your teeth. Celery sticks, carrots and Granny Smith or Roma apples (less sugar than other varieties, I think) at my house. On a completely different topic, I have found that it is very easy to wash raw egg off of vinyl siding.
Will nobody rise in defense of the delicious Twix bar?
…I have found that it is very easy to wash raw egg off of vinyl siding…
BECAUSE OF THE ALBUMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hand out fried eggs and beer. And cartons of Pall Mall.
For some reason they still trick or treat in my neighborhood. But I think they are less of them now. I used to hand out the “good stuff”, candy bars til they ran out, then suckers and then the big fall back bag of those little hard candies with a zillion in the bag. Last two years never got to the fall back.
When people ask me what I did Halloween night I say, I handed out candy to the children of “bad parents”. You have to be a bad parent to send your kid up to take candy from that really strange old man that lives alone.
In the 60’s, I used to love the smarties and pixie sticks! If there was one chocolate bar, we would feel like we hit the jackpot!
I’ll never forget the one boy, from a real “bad” family a couple of blocks over, who trick-or-treated early in the evening–and then gave out that candy at his door.
For the last few years I have added colorful Halloween decorated pencils to my largesse. Well recieved (along with the candy). I always have several children comment favorably about the pencils. The candy is usually the Hershey’s varieties.
No, they’re not called “Bite-Size” anymore, they’re FUN SIZE!
Like fun doesn’t get any bigger than that.
I supply the little kiddies with blocks of wax, cans of spray paint and maps to my ex’s house.
She hates me and I don’t know why.
My neighborhood had a woman who dressed as a witch and put handfulls of “worms” (cooked, cold spaghetti) into your trick or treat bag, whether you liked it or not.
As I do every year, I handed-out flyers to the protest rally the World Worker’s Party is holding this weekend, to Speak Truth To Power over the cynical marketing of SWEETENED DEATH to children. Your plan is so transparent, LEWIS SCOOTER LIBBY: get them hooked at an early age, then keep them so fat and in a constant sugar high so they won’t realize the extent of your CRIMES.
Of course you like Sugar Daddys, also known as the Depleted Uranium of candy. “Sugar Daddy” is an apt reminder of how Cheney’s Halliburton is making you filthy rich through its unjust occupation of Afghanistan’s delicious oil fields. You don’t like Twix? What is it, the fact that they’re three kinds of BROWN? Or does “It’s All in the Mix” conflict with your divisive racist hatred against People Of Color being forced to pidgeonhole their identities? THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO BE INDIVIDUALS WHEN DIVISIVENESS NO LONGER EXISTS
Wankers.
LEWIS LIBBY SQUEALED, PLAME’S COVER WAS REVEALED!
APF-
Damn, you’re good at that.
harrison …
… bastardized version of Lik-m-Ade. Now there was a classic!
yeah, i’m thinking “fun” is at least a pound.
tw: figure, yeah, that would explain my figure.