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“Contentedness”:  a protein wisdom micro-fiction

     The man leaned forward in his seat, scooping warm con queso dip onto a lime-tinged tortilla chip, which he shoveled rapidly into his mouth.  “Mmm,” he said, nudging his wife with an elbow.  “This is really good dip.”

     “I know,” she said.  “Isn’t it awesome?”

19 Replies to ““Contentedness”:  a protein wisdom micro-fiction”

  1. Sean C. says:

    Lime-tinged tortilla chip?  I feel like I’ve been asleep for the past hundred years.

  2. none says:

    Why, yes. It most certainly is awesome.

  3. Tim P says:

    Leftist contentedness –

    Though he had nothing to do with the harvest of the ingredients by the peasants that went into the making of this homogenized drab mass-produced glop. The man leaned forward in his seat, and guiltily scooped the warm con queso dip onto a lime-tinged tortilla chip and shoveled it rapidly into his mouth.  He briefly thought about the poor wretches, exploited by western capitalist corporate pigs and forced to slave away for a pittance and at great expense to the fragile enviornment for their momentary pleasure.

    “Mmm,” he said, nudging his wife with an elbow.  “That’s really good dip.”

    “I know,” she said.  “Isn’t it awesome?”

    “That damned Bush and those heartless Rethuglicans. I really hate them and what they’ve done to this planet.”

    “Mmph,” she said.  “The bastard, pass the dip over here, would ya?” As she bit down on another chip.

  4. DigSauce says:

    Shouldn’t that really read:

    “I know,” she said. “Isn’t it awesome?”

  5. Jeff Goldstein says:

    Maybe the way your wife talks.

  6. Pol Pothead says:

    The reich-wingnut bigotry is so transparent in this post.

    ‘The man’ gets mentioned first, while the womyn is simply ‘his wife’, a mere appendage of the phallicist oppressor.

    Lime-tinged tortilla chips were originally created as cheap fare for slaves aboard the trading ships.

    ‘Con quesos’ is the original derogatory Spanish term used by the imperialist conquistadors to refer to the indigenous inhabitants of Wisconsin.

    ‘Elbow’ is a slang term for an unmarried post-pubescent male member of the Ookabollaponga tribe of Mid-Lower Upper Volta.

    ‘Dip’ is a term of vicious disparagement often applied to social justice activists like myself.

    Whether or not any of these things is actually true, per se, has no bearing on the discussion.  Whatever Goldstein may try to say he said, or whatever he thinks he said, what came out was, “Let’s kill all the darkies and queers and steal their oil.” I and all my progressyve brethryn and systryn await lavish apologies for Goldstein offending our sensibilities with his racist hate speech, the dirty Joooooo!

  7. Roscoe K says:

    Good gawd! These two couldn’t possibly be more smug!

  8. Sean C. says:

    I am growing more and more enchanted by the Say Anything Girl’s breasts every time I visit PW.  They are now a fixation, an obsession, an optical black hole to which my eyes are forever glued.  I see them in my dreams, dreams which are fast becoming nightmares, see those perfectly round spheres of unnobtainable perfection, always out of reach.  If I could only reach a bit further, if I could only just touch…

    MAKE IT STOP! Jeff, please, make it stop!

  9. Matt says:

    The yin and yang of interpersonal relationships:

    Yin: Honey, I just read a post on Protein Wisdon and I really want some queso.

    Yang: That’s great! After you finish rinsing my panty hose, you can drag your lazy ass down to Taco Bell.

    (Seriously though, she’s in the kitchen making some right now, am I a great Republican, or what?)

  10. mezzrow says:

    This made me shoot hot queso out of my nose.  Not pleasant – but this still makes me laugh.  I guess I couldn’t wait for Jeff to put up a Mother Sheehan post to lob this one in…

    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/40764

    turing word ‘blue’ as in – “Sometimes Jeff works a little blue for me, said Jonah to Merv…”

  11. Jay says:

    That’s not contentedness.  That’s denial.

    Jeff, you aren’t fooling anyone.

  12. Seth Williams says:

    That’s very nice and all but…well, I question the fictionality of it.

  13. joe says:

    obviously you’re high

  14. alppuccino says:

    “Holy shit Eunice!  You’ve got a bit of cilantro stuck in your teeth that looks exactly like the woman who touched Jesus’ cloak and was miraculously healed of her bleeding problems!” Bert then grabbed her head and held it in both hands like a he would a volleyball just before executing a perfect overhead smash.  “Don’t move.  Don’t chew.  Don’t lick your teeth.  I’ll get Reverend Lovejoy.”

    Those writing classes at the community college are really paying off.

  15. Beck says:

    I always thought the “con” in “con queso” meant with.  You see it in context of “chili con queso,” as in chili with cheese.  The standard Tex Mex label for chips and cheese dip is “chips ‘n queso.” But I only speak spring-break Spanish, as they call it, so I’m not really positive.  Which reminds me of a past favorite drinking hole in Houston, a joint known as simply Texadelphia.  Tex for short.  They had great cheese steaks, and some of the best queso you’ll find.  They mixed jalapeno juice in it for a little extra kick.  Tex only served beer though.  It was that kind of place.  But every square inch of wall was covered in either neon beer signs, animal skulls, or widescreen TVs.  Paradise in other words.

  16. OHNOES says:

    Maybe I’m low-brow… but I don’t get it.

  17. David says:

    Says a lot more about the reader and viewership of BBC, and the political mythology of those who are more likely to answer surveys about one world government, than it does any prevailing mainstream opinion

  18. David says:

    ups, wrong post..

  19. Eric says:

    ’con queso’ dip … that’s sort of like ‘au jus’ sauce …

Comments are closed.