1. this welcome respite from nannystate meddling into everything from my shower head to the puddles in my back yard.
2. greenhouse gas poisoning, though the symptoms won’t show up until the government re-opens and tells me how damaged I’ve been by water vapor and human exhalation
3. more profound idiocy from Davids Brooks and Frum
4. this lousy teabagging
5. the chance to use a potato-chip dispensing vending machine without feeling guilty!
6. peace and fucking quiet
7. really affordable handjobs from furloughed administrative assistants at the Department of whatever
8. an unregulated picnic, which I somehow managed to live through
9. the chance to live my dream of being a racist, homophobic, xenophobic, misogynistic, nativist extremist anarchist with terrorist and arsonist tendencies — with no one around to send me to re-education classes!
10. a bunch of 15-round magazines for my assault rifle and my tac 45
11. a lecture on why I should care.
12. 40 acres and a mule. Though I had to steal them from a sharecropper.
13. the crazy idea that PBS and NPR must somehow be considered essential government services.
14. Shingles. I blame the Republicans!
15. an opportunity to paint my house without crazily being forced to put my ladder on a tarp, lest I be compelled to either fall and injure myself or pay a regulatory fine
16. a PopTart bitten in to the shape of a gun. Which I gave to my son. And let him blast away around the neighborhood until every house was sprayed with imaginary blueberry bullets.
17. an iPod filled with Obama’s speeches. Which I’m quite sure I never ordered. Stupid Amazon.
18. even more national debt!
19. a final chance to see my own doctor, and have somebody familiar to me stick a finger in my ass.
20. a remarkably normal and uneventful day, during which the sky didn’t fall, the economy didn’t collapse, the stock market didn’t tank, and the world kept right on spinning. Imagine!
Feel free to add your own.
I don’t see how you can joke about the fact that people can’t go to Lake Meade today and recreate.
Because I have the freedom to joke today. Supreme irony alert!
Shingles! Scary, right?
I mean, clambering up on the roof to make repairs only to discover that your chicken-pox varicella zoster virus returns as a painful herpes zoster infection just as you reach out to replace that broken section of roofing tabs? The bastards!
Maybe we should look to government to
providemandate universal terne roofing access, and get rid of that lousy asphalt crap? Imma check with John Roberts about that.I had shingles once and they didn’t hurt at all.
Wotta gyp!
Panda cam is down; oh noes.
Think of all the magicians who will be puling rabbits out of hats at children’s parties without a federal license, a FEMA-approved “disaster plan” and random USDA inspections. What about that, huh? Huh?
I’ve heard (but have not seen confirmed) that Congress has exempted itself from the pay stoppage. Anyone know the truth of that?
… incredibly over-priced PPO-style health insurance that I didn’t want or need, but I have to buy or the IRS will fine me.
Also pulling rabbits, which may or may not be puling due to the lack of federal government oversight.
LMC: They’ll be getting the 95 bucks from me next year (under protest, of course). That’s it.
21. …a lame-ass explanation as to why “Assistant Sub-undersecretary of Cowboy Poetic Offerings” is an “essential” function.
Congress has exempted itself from the pay stoppage.
heh, no need! That’s one of those bits of the Constitution for which they stand firm as ever can be.
Thanks! Ah, yes. The 27th Amendment. I’d forgotten about that “feature”.
Strange, right? It’s almost like the ruling class can think of and prepare for everything when the subject comes to their own interests!
Heck, we might even extrapolate to imagine how focused their minds could become were the demos to offer to allow them to stare at a hangman’s noose for a few minutes. But then we’d be forced to wonder what was missing that the need for focus hadn’t occurred to them sooner.
This morning I thought I was getting shingles but it turned out to be a scorpion sting.
These little southern scorpions are wusses.
I am wondering if we can have a government shutdown haiku contest. Bonus points for panda cam reference.
Sorry: panda cam.
My response to this would be: if you need government dollars on a daily basis to keep a fucking web cam running, you are doing it rong.
We can see through a
panda cam darkly. Refresh?
No more Ling-Ling? Weeps.
The government shut down and all I got was a mouthful of peas and a few orange tear streaks on my jacket. And an IRS audit. And a swat team style raid on the place I work looking for OSHA violations. And…
I love that half the stuff they’ve determined to be “non-essential” is stuff we have to pay fees for anyway. Say, for instance, that you want to download a set of development impact multipliers for Polk County, Iowa. The Bureau of Economic Analysis already has those numbers. They’re sitting in the database, just waiting for some loving family to adopt them and bring them home, for the low, low price of $250. But no! We’re not allowed to purchase those multipliers, because SHUTDOWN! So they’re cutting off the profit centers, because they want to piss off their paying customers, in the hopes that we’ll complain to Congress and demand that BEA get lots of money to do a lot of bullshit programs and research that we won’t actually use.
And these assholes wonder why we don’t trust them with money?
My dad had the shingles and he said he never noticed until he was at the doctor and the doctor pointed it out to him.
Apparently, di and my dad are badasses.
“The government shut down and all I got was…”
Free breadsticks and a coupon for 10% off my next order.
It pisses me off that the only Americans who seem to understand the relationship between themselves and their government are a small group of WWII veterans. Everywhere else, all you see are timid tourists whining about the parks and museums being closed.
Where are the brave ones? Just because some idiot in Washington says the Statue of Liberty is closed doesn’t make it so! Put 200 people on a boat and pull up to the dock, and dare the federal rent-a-cops to open fire! I wanna see a line of RVs driving through Yosemite, and I don’t really care if the stupid ones get eaten because Ranger Rick wasn’t there to tell them not to feed the bears. I wanna see a guy with an ice cream truck roll up to the edge of the Grand Canyon and make a fucking fortune ‘cuz it’s a hot day and the regular snack bar is closed.
We used to be a proud, free people with dignity and character. We could be again. Just look at the old farts who walked through the barriers at the WWII Memorial. We can do it!
If you were one of the dudes who stormed the beach at Normandy, a little barrier and a fat security guard with a cheap badge isn’t exactly going to put the fear into you.
What’s he going to do? Shoot them?
Leigh, for some reason this incident at the WWII Memorial put me in mind of the chapter “The Scouring Of The Shire” from “The Return Of The King”.
I prefer roofing tiles.
They probably feel like an ant bite.
Illuvatar knows this shire could use a good scouring right about now…
dingy harry
Harry Reid poisons another well by releasing normally-private communications between his office and Boehner’s staff.
I saw that, too. Harry needs a tune up, as they say.
The Silence of the FLOTUS.
Best shutdown evuh!
How do we arrange for the shutdown to last until 20 January 2017?
How do we arrange for the shutdown to last until 20 January 2017?
start passing crs that go employee by employee
test
Over 93% of EPA Employees Considered ‘Non-Essential’
Seen on Facebook:
shutdown -k
shutdown -c too
“Now that the government has shut down, who’s going to read my email, harass me, and waste my money?”
America: weaker, bitterly divided, poorer, dumber, burdened with a turgid shrinking over taxed and over regulated economy , spuring development of its own energy resources, ridiculed by the rest of the world…hey, but at least gay people can get married. Eventually. Right after we get rid of evil black military assault grade guns made for hunting humans that come with bayonet lugs and that shoulder thing that goes up and fire high capacity semi-automatic ammunition. And mastication -manufactured poptart guns. And imaginary grenades. And drawings of guns or things that might be guns.
Yep.
spuring -> spurning
One of them will pull Cthulhu out by accident and then everything will end?
Cthulhu might explain the sudden and nearly universal outbreak of insanity.
Which makes me worry even more about those of us who haven’t gone mad.
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“One of them will pull Cthulhu out by accident and then everything will end? ”
Don’t worry man. According to ‘The Shadow out of Time’ mankind is still around and going strong by 16,000 AD. Nug-Soth said so to Nathaniel Wingate Peaslee in the library of the Yithian city in the past. Nug Soth would know. He’s from 16,000 AD. Would Nug-Soth lie about a thing like that? So relax.
The Old Ones apparently have an ice age or two to wait a’fore they get their day. Teke-li-li.
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