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“DOJ Tells Employees to Verbally Affirm Homosexuality”

Uh, ok:   You’re queer enough, you’re fabulous enough, and gosh darn it, people accept your same-sex gropings and penetrations.

Todd Starnes:

The Department of Justice has been accused of religious intolerance and viewpoint discrimination after workers were sent an email directing them to verbally affirm homosexuality, according to a law firm specializing in religious liberty and now representing a DOJ whistleblower.

Liberty Counsel said DOJ employees were emailed a brochure called “LGBT Inclusion at Work: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Managers.” The brochure was created as a resource from DOJ Pride, an association of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender employees of the DOJ.

A Department of Justice spokesperson did not return calls seeking comment. Fox News also reached out to DOJ Pride for comment – but emails were not answered.

Among the directives in the brochure is an order for workers to vocally affirm homosexuality.

“Don’t judge or remain silent,” the brochure read. “Silence will be interpreted as disapproval.”

–Well, in fairness, what would reasonable people think of your failure to vocally affirm homosexuality?  I mean, it does seem kind of, you know, curious, and perhaps speaks to some kind of subconscious hatred you are harboring toward the gays, unbeknownst even to you…

READER POLL!

They were also told to post “DOJ Pride” stickers in their office to indicate “that it is a safe place.”

And by “safe,” they of course mean a place where people can’t be all “judgey”.  That we save for the teabaggers and the religious kooks.

One gay DOJ employee is quoted in the directive; “Silence seems like disapproval. There’s still an atmosphere of LGBT issues not being appropriate for the workplace (particularly for transgender people), or that people who bring it up are trying to rock the boat.”

[…]

Liberty Counsel is representing an unidentified female DOJ worker in Washington, D.C. who received the brochure.

Staver said the woman is terrified she might lose her job unless she publicly affirms homosexuality – and she’s not the only one.

“Christians are frightened and terrified of losing their jobs,” Staver told Fox News. “You just can’t keep you head down and do your job. Now you have to become an advocate for the LGBT agenda – and if you don’t – the DOJ will consider that to be intolerant.”

And if you attend a US university that takes money from the federal government, you are a latent sexual harasser right up until the time you make it through without having been accused of making anyone feel uncomfortable in some way.

Welcome to the world where questions over what come to count as legitimate beliefs about language and interpretation have real-life political consequences, where what we think we’re doing when we interpret or assign validity to certain methods of ascertaining meaning isn’t “fundamentally unserious,” but instead, the very thing that is driving the progressive agenda, giving it a sense of historical inevitability.

Welcome to my world.

Glad you all could finally make it.

(h/t Dennis D)

91 Replies to ““DOJ Tells Employees to Verbally Affirm Homosexuality””

  1. sdferr says:

    The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Management:

    1) Keep Rim-jobbing in house
    2) Donate un-used lubes to an office frequently
    3) Maintain a fresh supply of individualized hand towel samples
    4) Host afterhours mixers with gusto

  2. Ernst Schreiber says:

    So. How long before the pink mafia deems vocal assent insufficient support for their agenda?

  3. bh says:

    There’s a rather long list of items I’ve never verbally affirmed or condemned at work. This would probably include rape, murder by flame, and all recorded genocides.

    It’s best to keep people guessing.

  4. dicentra says:

    Hey ‘feets, remember when I said that SSM was going to be used as a cudgel to whack religious people and you said that you didn’t think so?

    Wanna tell me that again?

  5. newrouter says:

    this is really gay

  6. Ernst Schreiber says:

    Since we’ve reached the all –sexuals are equal / homosexuals are more equal stage, what’s the LGBT version of four legs good / two legs better?

  7. leigh says:

    So, now that everyone is free to gay it up in the workplace, including showtunes on the Muzak, no doubt, is it also okay to wear my “Express Diversity” tee shirt with the pictures of all kinds of firearms on Casual Fridays?

    I really don’t like the idea of riding in an elevator with a woman who tells me I have a great rack, but maybe that’s just me.

  8. newrouter says:

    the gay agenda is boring and anti science.

  9. cranky-d says:

    The only people you are allowed to make uncomfortable are straight Jews and Christians.

  10. newrouter says:

    the freaks of nature are in full bloom

  11. Pablo says:

    “Oh, you’re gay? Well, then. Suck my dick.”

    Done and done.

  12. Ernst Schreiber says:

    I really don’t like the idea of riding in an elevator with a woman who tells me I have a great rack, but maybe that’s just me.

    You’ll take that compliment and like it, if you know what’s good for your career homophobe.

    Gay trumps sexual harrassment in the victims’ hierarchy.

  13. BigBangHunter says:

    – If someone is going to schedule that “piller of salt” day, they need to get cracking.

  14. cranky-d says:

    I really don’t like the idea of riding in an elevator with a woman who tells me I have a great rack, but maybe that’s just me.

    This deserves some kind of response other than the one Ernst gave. However, I think everyone should just fill in the blank themselves.

  15. geoffb says:

    Maybe the DOJ’s new policy is the first taste of the Emperor’s new royal clothes.

    President Obama told attendees at a Democratic fundraiser in Chicago on Wednesday that the solutions to many of the country’s problems are clear, but the GOP is standing in the way.

    “We’ve got a politics that’s stuck right now,” he said, according to a pool report. “The reason it’s stuck is because people spend more time thinking about the next election than they do the next generation.”

    Obama said he still wants to work with Republicans willing to compromise, but if he continues to face GOP obstructionism motivated by what he described as efforts to score political points, he’ll have to find a way to work around them.

  16. leigh says:

    You guys told me I was over-reacting to being friendly with coworkers of the same sex, but this is exactly what I was talking about. Everything becomes some sort of crackling sexual innuendo. It’s part of that everything that is not forbidden is mandatory thing.

  17. newrouter says:

    put salt on weiner-holder 2016

  18. newrouter says:

    report fag abuse to the nacl

  19. BigBangHunter says:

    – From the “I could have told them when you play ‘support the neurosis’ politics, nothing will ever be enough” book.

  20. LBascom says:

    I’m really disappointed. All this time I’ve been told the Christian right are moral busybodies obsessed with what other people do in the privacy of their bedrooms, and are intent on making everyone get on their knees and pray.

    Now I find out it ain’t the Christians so obsessed, and praying isn’t why they want me on my knees.

    It’s all very confusing…

  21. cranky-d says:

    I agree that with the gay thing out in the open nonsexual same-sex friendships become much more difficult. Very little touching is allowed, for instance, lest someone assume more than is warranted. Stuff like this just makes it worse.

    How about we all just keep it to ourselves? I really don’t want to hear about your intimate behavior no matter who else is involved.

  22. Libby says:

    How does one do this, exactly?

    “Hey, I don’t want to you to feel singled out for being different or anything, but just wanted you to know I’m all good with you being gay!” *gives two thumbs up and a fake smile* “OK, back to work.”

    After numerous corporate sexual harassment classes it seems like commenting on one of your staff’s sexual preference would be unwelcome and contribute to a ‘hostile work environment.’

  23. BigBangHunter says:

    – “Oh by the way Leigh, I meant to complement you on having great aureola’s, but in a totally non-harrassing way, so I’m not picturing them, just so you know.

  24. Libby says:

    I should mention that my boss is gay, and having worked with her for over a decade this topic has never come up. We talk regularly about our lives outside of work and neither of us has ever felt the need to verbally establish that we do, in fact, accept the other’s lifestyle choices. Amazing, I know. It’s like it’s no big deal or something – we must be doing something wrong, eh?

  25. leigh says:

    Ha, BBH!

    The thing with all this gay gay all the way stuff, is as cranky says, the touching. I am one of those people who will put a hand on your arm when I’m telling you something, will hug you if I haven’t seen you for a while or have received good news about you, tell you look nice if you are dressed in something new, et cetera. It’s infuriating that normal affectionate behavior is considered a come on now.

  26. serr8d says:

    “Silence will be interpreted as disapproval.”

    Office Staffer Who Is Teh Ghey: “I’m having friends over tonight. It’s a ‘bring your own gerbil’ party. Join us?”

    Me:

    OSWITG:

    Me:

    OSWITG: “That’s it! I’m suing you for your non-homosexual-compliant lifestyle choice, which is creating an intolerable workplace for me! You’ll be SORRY!”

  27. BigBangHunter says:

    – So we’ve “evolved” to the point now where if you’re not gay you have no rights to privacy.

  28. SBP says:

    “There’s still an atmosphere of LGBT issues not being appropriate for the workplace”

    How about personal sexual issues of any kind not being appropriate for the workplace?

    I mean, if a (male) coworker’s (hetero) wife turns up pregnant, do I say “Man, you must’ve really been slipping her the ol’ salami, eh? High five! Any special position you prefer?”

    No. I do not.

  29. newrouter says:

    the gheys are gay

    We shall go on to the end, we shall mock them fight in France, we shall mock them fight on the seas and oceans, we shall mock them fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be, we shall mock them fight on the beaches, we shall mock them fight on the landing grounds, we shall mock them fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall mock them fight in the hills; we shall never surrender

  30. BigBangHunter says:

    – Turning just for a moment from “how ghey is my valley”, HuffPoop is headlining the steady slide down the ejection shute for Holder, the Left media engine having decided with him under the bus maybe it will all go away. Both the NYT and AP have formally turned down the invite to the Holder “meet the press” crying towel party, using the excuse its “off the record”. Yeh. Ok. So just when did they decide Holder would be the sacrificial liar among the clan.

    – I don’t think Issa will even notice. Bumblefuck and Hildebeast are still out there.

  31. happyfeet says:

    working for the government is gayer than staying late at the weenie roast outside putin’s tent at the boy scout jamboree

  32. mondamay says:

    SBP says May 29, 2013 at 8:19 pm

    Me: So, are you and your “partner” expecting yet?

    Gay Coworker: …

    Me: Oh, I’m sorry. Our insurance provides excellent fertility diagnostics!

    Gay Coworker: (walks off in disgust)

    Me: (checks off “say something gay supportive for this month” box on clipboard)

  33. mondamay says:

    Only sort of off-topic:

    Would directing them to this link be considered supportive?

    It is known as the happiness chemical, but could serotonin also influence sexual preference? It certainly seems to in mice.

    Serotonin is normally associated with mood – particularly feelings of well-being. But when Yi Rao of Peking University in Beijing, China, and his colleagues genetically engineered female mice so that they could no longer make or respond to serotonin, it appeared to affect their sexuality.

    Although they would still mate with males if no other females were present, given the choice, the rodents preferred sniffing and mounting females.

  34. Alec Leamas says:

    I pledge allegiance to the Fag
    of the United States of America
    and to the Bloody Rectum for which it stands,
    one Nation under Cock, indubitable,
    with Liberty and Justice for the right sort.

  35. LBascom says:

    In Holders America, the man letting squeaky farts is suspect.

  36. newrouter says:

    baracky be a butt fucker. ask michelle.

  37. BigBangHunter says:

    – Speaking of Shrillary, apparently her and her Lefturd minions are taking the “off the radar” approach, hoping MIA out of sight out of mind will get her through the storm. Not a peep from the media these days is deafening.

  38. geoffb says:

    And by “safe,” they of course mean a place where people can’t be all “judgey”. That we save for the teabaggers and the religious kooks.

    Here come the “judgey.”

  39. happyfeet says:

    i think they’re wrong

    you can be plenty affirmative by not saying anything verbally

    you try it – just go to work tomorrow and pat the gay people on the head and maybe scritch them behind their ears a little

    you will have friends for life

  40. BigBangHunter says:

    – If its just the same to you, and even if it isn’t happyfool, I’d just as soon not touch those ears. Who knows where they’ve been.

  41. happyfeet says:

    ok so just do the pat pat on the head

    it all good

  42. Gulermo says:

    “you will have friends for life”

    No. No you won’t. They hate andenvy you. They also blame you for their every failure in their miserable lives.

  43. Gulermo says:

    “it all good”

    I’ve been down this road a time or two. P*ss your sunshine on some one else’s leg.

  44. happyfeet says:

    your life would make a good series on the cw

    someday when I get a writer’s gig there I’ll remember your story and pitch a show called Gulermo’s Creek about this earnest young man what in spite of his best efforts – scritching behind the ears and all – is hated and envied and blamed for every failure in the miserable lives of others

    but then he gets bited by a vampire and everything what was dark in his world fades away, which is ironic cause of course he is banished from the day by the cruel yet wondrous sanguinary curse what has wrought such enormous changes on his life

    but that doesn’t mean he gets to take a pause from training for the olympics in some kind of activity where you take your clothes off a lot to where the camera pans up and also down

    but it’s his father’s elusive approval what he aspires to more than anything

  45. Gulermo says:

    Lie and obfuscate.

    Not surprised.

  46. Gulermo says:

    “scritching behind the ears and all – is hated and envied and blamed for every failure in the miserable lives of others”

    Do you deny that homosexuals exhibit these behaviors?

  47. BigBangHunter says:

    – Best advice you’ll get all week happyfool – keep your day job.

  48. happyfeet says:

    i will i promise

  49. Gulermo says:

    Into each life some rain must fall.

  50. BigBangHunter says:

    – In happy’s case he seems to be a regular Mr.Pxyztplx. For those that don’t catch the pop-culture reference, that’s the little impish dude that walked around with his own personal raincloud over his head that gave the original DC comics Superman fits.

    – In other news…..

    – The Ulster Report is featuring an article by the so-called Republican WH insider in which he says a lot without saying much of anything except giving an account of a Congressional/WH meet where Holders demise was agreed too. Sounds a little to obvious in light of everything else in the past few days. Apparently when Bumblefuck did his “affirmation of support” for Holder that was the dog whistle signal to shove him out the door. But wait, theres more.

    – Malkin, whom I won’t link for obvious reasons, has a post on Sebelius titled Obamacare “Navigators”: Another Sebelius Snitch Brigade?” mentions that this version of the Bumblefuck Conservatives attack machine could well be ACORN redux. YMMV.

    – So when we get done with DoJ and Holder, who btw may well have met with Waffle ears on the night of the attack, and so is up to his ass in that debackle as well, we’ll just be getting started. DoJ personel just below Holder are lawyering up, which is never a good sign for the rats.

    – It’s going to be a long summer.

  51. BigBangHunter says:

    – Oh, one other note. All this gathering of personal data is most likely being funneled right back to the DNC. Maybe at some point we’ll be lucky enough to see dome disgruntled worker bee in that org go rogue and start singing.

    – Speaking of singing, at some point as all this shit rolls downhill, Hillary better take the lead if she has any reputation left to save. If Holder is any indication of the WH intended tactics at damage control she’ll be next if she doesn’t. Of course if shes complicit then I guess it won’t matter. Best case senario, her and Bumblefuck get into a pissing contest that takes the whole shiteree down.

  52. Wm T Sherman says:

    Hillary reportedly is coming out as gay in her forthcoming autobiography. Being female is no longer sufficiently compelling — she has resolved to qualify as a twofer in the victimhood spoils system.

  53. Obama said he still wants to work with Republicans willing to compromise

    He keeps using that word. I do not think it means what he thinks it means.

  54. Alec Leamas says:

    Cromwell: Now, Sir Thomas, you stand on your silence.

    Sir Thomas More: I do.

    Cromwell: But, gentlemen of the jury, there are many kinds of silence. Consider first the silence of a man who is dead. Let us suppose we go into the room where he is laid out, and we listen: what do we hear? Silence. What does it betoken, this silence? Nothing; this is silence pure and simple. But let us take another case. Suppose I were to take a dagger from my sleeve and make to kill the prisoner with it; and my lordships there, instead of crying out for me to stop, maintained their silence. That would betoken! It would betoken a willingness that I should do it, and under the law, they will be guilty with me. So silence can, according to the circumstances, speak! Let us consider now the circumstances of the prisoner’s silence. The oath was put to loyal subjects up and down the country, and they all declared His Grace’s title to be just and good. But when it came to the prisoner, he refused! He calls this silence. Yet is there a man in this court – is there a man in this country! – who does not know Sir Thomas More’s opinion of this title?

    Crowd in court gallery: No!

    Cromwell: Yet how can this be? Because this silence betokened, nay, this silence was, not silence at all, but most eloquent denial!

    Sir Thomas More: Not so. Not so, Master Secretary. The maxim is “Qui tacet consentire”: the maxim of the law is “Silence gives consent”. If therefore you wish to construe what my silence betokened, you must construe that I consented, not that I denied.

    Cromwell: Is that in fact what the world construes from it? Do you pretend that is what you wish the world to construe from it?

    Sir Thomas More: The world must construe according to its wits; this court must construe according to the law.

    . . . and then the axeman chopped off his head.

  55. Alec Leamas says:

    Hillary reportedly is coming out as gay in her forthcoming autobiography.

    Has any previous presidential aspirant’s autobiography began with the words “Dear Penthouse Forum . . . ?”

  56. greg46107 says:

    This is all very interesting. When I was in the lifestyle back in the late 60s and through the 70s, we just wanted to be left alone. I always saw myself as pretty much like anyone else, except for this one little thing. To that end, I held down a regular job, mowed my lawn when it needed it, enjoyed a good wine with dinner, voted, paid my bills on time, took in a good movie every now and then, and generally lived life as best I could. Where things are today was a minor undercurrent many of us were aware of, but wanted nothing to do with at the time.

    I’ve been out of the lifestyle since the early 80s, married to a wonderful woman for 25+ years (though that was never the “goal” and has never been a benchmark of my healing), and have watched over the years as militant dynamics have shifted to the forefront. Where as once we wanted to be left to ourselves, the issue eventually became articulated as one of socio-political acceptance.

    I can only say that all the social and political accommodations ever made available would never help me deal with the familial, physiological and environmental issues that formed in me the belief system that led me to make the choices I made concerning where I would find my value, security and identity.

  57. Physics Geek says:

    “Don’t judge or remain silent,” the brochure read. “Silence will be interpreted as disapproval.”

    I dunno. Would fuck you be interpreted as disapproval? Because that would be my first, second and well, every single response to this piece of horseshit.

  58. Pablo says:

    Point of order: Was this sent by the DOJ itself, or by this ridiculous DOJ Pride outfit?

    If it’s the latter, I’d file a complaint that they need to keep their sex lives out of my workplace. Then I’d start White Men of DOJ and start emailing everyone about my issues.

  59. mondamay says:

    BigBangHunter says May 30, 2013 at 12:55 am
    Malkin, whom I won’t link for obvious reasons,

    It wasn’t obvious to some of us. I have since educated myself (Jeff’s big September post explaining the whole thing).

    What’s scary is that even *I* noticed something was up from the reduced number of links to PW in Malkin’s “Buzzworthy” section. I’m guessing that the issue must have spread to include many more than Jeff, because by the time I left, several familiar sites had disappeared from the rotation, and fully half the links consistently were for a site named for identity politics (I abhor “isms” and “ality”, so I have never visited the blog, nor will I mention it by name here).

    Even after leaving, I still went back to check and see if any PW links showed up (It’s like a sore tooth; you have to push at it with your tongue). I don’t have to do it anymore: Buzzworthy is gone, and it is now just a link to posts on Twitchy.

    In meager defense of Malkin, I will say that PW was a pretty regular fixture in the Buzzworthy side-bar on her site during most of the time I was reading/participating there. The links dried up completely sometime after the election if I recall correctly.

  60. JHoward says:

    And the winner of the Phrase Most Distant from the Establican’s Minds category goes to … Religion of State!

    [applause]

  61. Ernst Schreiber says:

    You might have linked the post in question, for those of us too lazy to go find it for ourselves.

    He said, mock accusatorialy.

  62. mondamay says:

    Sorry.

  63. JHoward says:

    I’d start White Men of DOJ and start emailing everyone about my issues.

    LOL. [Immediately snaps face back to stern, politically-correct demeanor.]

    Yesterday, during a self-pay episode with a local for-profit medical corporation, a minion disdainfully interrogated me as to how I could conform to — as I took it — her Wednesday PMS. Just because she could. Even private medicine is rapidly conforming to the new us-dispensary / you-marginally-qualified-dependent paradigm.

    I don’t have a problem with PMS. I have a problem kneeling before paid service providers.

    I bring this up because the insanity in both cases is so Jupiter-sized as to escape all rational notice by a good third of this sorry little failshit nation, as I believe the phrase goes.

  64. Car in says:

    “I love my dead, gay son”.

  65. Ernst Schreiber says:

    OT, apropos of everything and nothing, here’s the problem with the GOP in a nutshell:

    “Her political troubles made her one of the few members of Congress who would be more difficult for her party to defend than an open seat would be. That is, Republicans would rather run a fresh candidate without Bachmann’s baggage than try to defend her suburban Twin Cities district. In 2012, Mitt Romney took 56.5 percent of the vote in Bachmann’s district; Bachmann eked out a win over Democrat Jim Graves by just 1.2 percentage points, or about 4,300 votes. Bachmann may have been the loudest member of the class of 2006, the one who inspired the most heated arguments. But she will hardly be the most consequential; her enduring legacy may be the lessons she taught in how to lose friends and become completely uninfluential.[*] With her exit, Democrats lose a potent fundraising tool. Republicans lose a headache they would just as soon do without.[**]” [emphasis added]

    * In the corridors of power and circles of influence that swirl around the toxic whirlpool that is our nation’s capitol, maybe; but then, for Wilson as with the rest of the political class, those are the only kinds of friends and influence worth having.

    **I suspect a lot of Republicans in and around Washington agree with this. She embarrasses them in the eyes of their ruling class colleagues on the Left. And that’s what’s wrong with the GOP.

    (via Jim Geraghty’s Morning Jolt of yesterday)

  66. Slartibartfast says:

    My reply would be “none of your fucking business”. Ditto if they were asking if I was straight.

    Interesting what’s deemed interesting, from day to day. Romney’s wealth: interesting. Penny Pritzker’s wealth: not interesting.

  67. Curmudgeon says:

    The Rule of Law is over. We have begun the Rule of The Anus.

  68. scooter says:

    “I wonder how he’d feel about a son with a limp wrist with a pulse.”

    I LOVE that movie.

  69. Car in says:

    And I feared no one would get the reference.

    so silly.

  70. Physics Geek says:

    Damn, scooter beat me to it. Stupid job and its demands on my time.

  71. Curmudgeon says:

    “I wonder how he’d feel about a son with a limp wrist with a pulse.”

    I LOVE that movie.

    In an era of otherwise lame teenpix, that one was a gem, a young Christian Slater impersonating Jack Nicholson notwithstanding.

  72. Gulermo says:

    “as to escape all rational notice by a good third of this sorry little failshit nation, ”

    They are aware of the insanity. They think they will be exempt from said insanity, by virtue of their belief in and support of said insanity. If the past is any indication of the progression of the process, those true believers have a problem waiting. Pol Pot’s regime could not be reached for comment.

  73. dicentra says:

    (though that was never the “goal” and has never been a benchmark of my healing),

    What were you healing from?

    I’m under the impression that same-sex attraction can originate in various ways, including but not limited to sexual abuse.

    If you don’t want to reveal extra-personal details, that’s cool, too. I was just wondering whether you considered yourself to be “born that way” or if it was a series of unfortunate events.

  74. leigh says:

    “I love my dead, gay son”.

    I just watched that movie a few months ago. One of my favs.

  75. Squid says:

    I like that they picked “affirm” as their verb of choice. For most people, to “affirm” means to declare or assert, thus making it sound like every member of the DOJ is expected to come out as gay. Indeed, a quick lookup of the dictionary definition of “affirm” shows that the “support and uphold” sense is the 4th one listed, after all the ones dealing with assertion or confirmation.

    One wonders why they didn’t go with “verbally support” or “verbally endorse” or “verbally promote” homosexuality. Why on Earth would they have chosen a verb that lent itself so well to ambiguity and potential misunderstanding…?

  76. greg46107 says:

    (you don’t want to reveal extra-personal details, that’s cool, too. I was just wondering whether you considered yourself to be “born that way” or if it was a series of unfortunate events.)

    http://hopeandnewlife.typepad.com/mere_healing/2010/09/my-story.html

  77. Ernst Schreiber says:

    Because it’s legalese Squid.

    (Also, my Oxford American dictionary widget has your 4th definition as it’s 2nd, so….)

  78. Squid says:

    You’re relying on what some Oxford don believes our words mean on this side of the pond?

    I thought I knew you, man.

  79. Curmudgeon says:

    Thanks, Greg, for a very thoughtful link.

  80. 11B40 says:

    Greetings:

    So, will DoJ be installing “glory holes”.

  81. mojo says:

    An example of an “unacceptable” affirmation:

    “My boss is a flaming fairy, and THAT’S OK!”

  82. LBascom says:

    Greg, beautiful testimony. Thanks.

  83. Gulermo says:

    “My boss is a flaming fairy, and THAT’S OK!”

    I’m a lumberjack and I’m okay
    I sleep all night and I work all day
    He’s a lumberjack and he’s okay
    He sleeps all night and he works all day

    I cut down trees, I eat my lunch
    I go to the lavat’ry
    On Wednesdays I go shopping
    And have buttered scones for tea
    He cuts down trees…
    He’s a lumberjack…

    I cut down trees, I skip and jump
    I like to press wild flow’rs
    I put on women’s clothing
    And hang around in bars
    He cuts down trees…
    He’s a lumberjack…

    I cut down trees, I wear high heels
    Suspendies and a bra
    I wish I’d been a girlie
    Just like my dear papa
    He cuts down trees…
    He’s a lumberjack…

  84. Pablo says:

    Wow. That’s some major league sharing, Greg. Props for attaining the insight required to do it.

  85. geoffb says:

    Penny Pritzker’s wealth: not interesting.

    And her 76 visits with the President while eclipsed by Schulman’s 118 has her beating Holder and Hillary.

  86. JHoward says:

    A remarkable retelling of a remarkable effort, Greg. Such is the purpose of the Examined Life. My respect to you, sir.

  87. mondamay says:

    leigh says May 30, 2013 at 9:18 am
    I just watched that movie a few months ago. One of my favs.

    Wife and I watched it a few weeks ago (for the first time). It was free to stream for Amazon Prime members, and she loves Winona Ryder.

  88. cranky-d says:

    I had to look it up to see you are talking about “Heathers.” That was a fun movie.

  89. leigh says:

    That movie is a scream. I’ve watched it many times. This last was with my kids who hadn’t seen it they loved it, too. Although, we did all gripe about Christian Slater’s really bad Nicholson imitation.

    “Veronica, my afterlife is so-o boring!”

  90. Curmudgeon says:

    “And if I have to sing ‘Kum-Bay-Yah’ one more time…”

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