Wait a second, man. If you’re gonna make your own cutoffs, you really have to commit. Now. Let’s see a little less denim and a little more Daisy Duke, brother. And don’t worry—you’ve definitely got the ass to pull it off. Trust me.
Search
Archive Calendar
| M | T | W | T | F | S | S |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | ||||||
| 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 |
| 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 |
| 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 |
| 30 | 31 | |||||
Archives
Categories
- A Government That Can Force You to Buy Health Insurance Can Make You Do Anything (3)
- a protein wisdom philosophy primer (3)
- academics (25)
- armadillo (8)
- Friday Fiction 100 Word Challenge (51)
- from the protein wisdom conceptual series (136)
- identity politics (33)
- If Republicans Win the Senate in 2014 (1)
- in which celebraties comment on current events (67)
- language / intentionalism (88)
- legal (6)
- My brief conversations with inanimate objects (130)
- NSA / FISA (46)
- One Term to Serve, the 2012 Revival (6)
- Overheard in a Fallujah bunker (27)
- Poems from 196x, Revised by the Ghost of Richard Brauti (27)
- protein wisdom's DNC coverage (30)
- protein wisdom's RNC coverage (29)
- protein wisdom: the movie Lists (20)
- Provocateurism (16)
- real-time empirical observations (51)
- red pills found behind the sofa cushions (42)
- Scenes from my driveway (61)
- Talking back to 80s music (41)
- The Martha Stewart Chronicles (58)
- The protein wisdom interviews (10)
- The protein wisdom original poems (142)
- Uncategorized (20,046)
- Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance, abridged (34)
Recent Comments
- In The Mailbox: 02.28.23 (Afternoon Edition) : The Other McCain on Hey, longtime pw readers…
- In The Mailbox: 12.23.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll truly IS a sad, embittered psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
- In The Mailbox: 07.18.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
Noy you don’t.
The scissors are lying to you again. Trust me.
My scissors are honest and pure.
Hmmmm.
You know I took your advice, but for some reason I keep hearing screams every time I bend over to tie my shoelaces.
Must be my hearing.
Fine. Have it your way.
But I’m tellin’ ya, if you cut ‘em up that high, you’re gonna give a whole new meaning to the phrase modified hang-out…
Pay no attention to the mirror Jeff.. I just watched VH1 Style, and they say that hanging one testicle out is going to be the hot look this summer.. The ‘crotch around your knees & ass crack showin’ look is so over… But careful.. one testicle hangin is stylish.. two is just obscene.. Three would be edgy if you can pull it off..
Your scissors are lying whores, Jeff. Everybody knows it.
Even you know it, deep down inside in your secret heart where you store all the dark thoughts that must never escape…like your unholy lust for Anne Murray.
Anne Murray?.. ANNE MURRAY?… I just finished standing up telling people you weren’t a liberal up north and you gotta thing for Anne Murray… That old eastern canadian … Anne Murray?
These are dark days…. Damn … I need a drink….
Better lower the legs on those cuttoffs about 8” if ya want a shot at her… .. cough.. .choke.. ..
Are those the same scissors who sing “tramps like us, baby we were born to run”?
Turing = ill, as in Thinking about shorts, scissors, and testicles makes me faintly ill.
No, there’s nothing Anne likes more than a firm young boy in cutoffs that are tight enough to show the lines of his ass, loose enough for her probing finger to get some testicular action.
tw: “sound”, as in “the next sound you hear will be the sanity inspector losing his lunch”.
Robert: LOL … tell him not to forget the flour, there’s a few more wrinkles there then he’s used to.
Now I gotta go lose my lunch dammit…
Give it up, Anne is on Rosie O’Donnell’s side of the fence if you know what I mean.
Not that there is anything wrong with that …
Does anyone know which brand of adhesive tape is appropriate for use on testicles?
Are you sure you want to leave the boys hanging in the breeze like that? Sounds like a risky scheme to me…good luck.
Does anyone know which brand of adhesive tape is appropriate for use on testicles?
Not duct tape, I can tell you that. Not unless you’re shaved. Ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch.
That’s what you call a MacGyver wax.
For the ultimate in S & M experience, coat testicle with wintergreen then duct tape and only remove while in the shower.
That would be beyond Ouch!
Please let’s not relive the testicle debacle from the summer of 2002.
On the front page of the Rocky Mountain News (I think; it might have been the Post) there was a picture of a man who was homeless from one of the 17 billion fires Colorado experienced that summer. This particular gentleman was clad only in a pair of cut-off shorts and was standing Captain Morgan like on a fallen log or some such object. The cameraman was kind enough to take the picture from a proper enough angle to include what the paper’s management described as a “flesh-colored shadow.”
Please, Jeff. No more flesh colored shadows.
Turing word friends – as in, there is no way we can be friends if you show me your flesh colored shadow.
Why do I have the feeling I’ve just stumbled into Lyddie England’s blog ? There’s no freakin’ way any one of ya’s gettin’ near my nibnargs with any duct tape, let alone a pair of scissors.
I’ll just keep my pants long, thanks.